10 month standing in crib training

[Pearceuccs]

We are back to BF to sleep because of standing in the crib. When we did the fading technique 2 months ago he never stopped whining/crying in his bed when he would put himself to sleep. We were never able to leave the room as the technique suggested. He was never content in his crib like some LO who just babble to themselves. I felt so bad for him having to go to bed sad. And now with the standing in the crib I don't know how'll we will retrain.  Plus we don't trust him to not fall and bonk his head because he's unstable in his crib   

[jessmum46]

Hi, these developmental leaps can play havoc with sleep can't they! It's very normal but very annoying but hopefully we can get you through it.

Could you please post your routine for us?  And could you describe the fading technique a bit more (is it like gradual withdrawal?) - where did you get to with it, how was he falling asleep before the standing started?  Was he going down awake and whining to himself in his own bed with you in the room, or were you more actively involved?  When you say whining/crying was it hard crying like he really needed you or was it more of a 'letting off steam'/moaning?

My LO was sleeping independently when the standing phase began but with her we just did walk in, lie her down, walk out again.  Then waited for her to cry for us, and repeated.  Lots of times!!  If he was previously settling on his own in bed but just with you in the room, there's no reason at all you can't do the same - just wait until he stands and cries, lie him back down, then return to your place in the room.  I would try not to go back to BF to sleep - that is undoing a whole lot of hard work and will be much harder to get out of as he gets older. 

A lot of people worry about LOs banging their heads in their crib but honestly there's not a whole lot of damage they can do to themselves and it doesn't happen as often as you would think.  Yes there might be the odd minor bump but that's part of learning to stand and develop and you can't be there all the time to stop it.  At some point he has to do it himself  

[Pearceuccs]

Im struggling with the routine a bit.

530-600 wake up on own
A 3 hr
S 1 hr
A 315
S 1 hr
A 315
S NW & EW

I tried pushing out the morning A time but still got 1 hour naps so I reverted to my earlier schedule but we do seem to be doing worse. If I get back on track with his independent sleep then he will find is best times I think and help me figure out his A time.

The gradual with drawl was the sleep lady shuffle. Where we would pat if he started to cry and a lot of shushing as we slowly made it farther away from the crib. We only were able to ever only get to his recliner. If we tried to leave he cried too hard. So we always just stayed in the room. At night was harder and it took more sushing and patting. I guess I was just sad that he never went to bed happy. Though it was the best sleep he ever got. At naps it was better just whining or a quick shush in the beginning mostly. Nighttime we felt like we needed to pat a lot.

He's also very unstable in the bed. Probably because he's in a sleep sack. But I'm reluctant to get rid of it. But I agree we should probably just do it. When he first started standing I tried laying him down but it seemed futile. Never ending laying him down.

[jessmum46]

Hi there again   His A times are really quite short for 10 months.  Although babies are all different, and some need more sleep than others, I would expect 3h-3h15 for babies of around 7 months old as an average, and possibly heading for 3.5-4h or so by 10 months.  https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=84884.0  I would give his A times a good push and see if that helps with settling quicker.  UT babies are awful!! 

[Pearceuccs]

Well I did the training again.. independent sleep using the shuffle methods. He's slept through the night the past 3 nights!! It really is the key. Had to remind him that he can do it on his own. We are still in the rubbing the back phase. It was hard to get outta that habit the last time. If he keeps sleeping good maybe we don't HAVE TO break the habit. If all needs Is a little back rubbing and sleeps all night, I'll take it.

Yesterday
Wu at 615
A 3hr15
S 2 hours!!
A 330
S 1 hour (till 415pm)
A 3hr45 ( tried to get him to go to bed at 7.. didn't fall asleep till 8
Sttn 10 hr 30 min ( seems to be his normal now unfortunately) minus him up from 515-530 but went back to sleep on own and it might have been because of me shutting his door

Today
Late wake up at 7 (usually it's 6... prob because of late BT
A 3hr50 (longer AT today because he had a hard time falling asleep and took an hour and finally feel asleep closer to 3hr50 AT- I tried putting him in his crib closer to 3hours and obviously to short even though it worked yesterday)
S 1hr20 (woke up at an hour and went back to sleep for another 20)
A 3 hr (short AT  because it was already 315pm and I was worried about BT)
S 38 min (I woke to persevere BT)
A 3
S BT 7pm
We will see how the night goes tonight

Seems like I should never let him sleep past 4pm.

Thanks!

[jessmum46]

That's great!  I hope the better sleep continues for you

[Pearceuccs]

Today went like:

3 NW total
Awake @  545 (goal of after 6am) (10 hours of sleep)
AT 5 hr
Slept 2hr30 min
Awake 5 hours
Asleep at 630pm

We did the push to 1 nap because I had to APOP big time for the second catnap and we were trying hard to get him to fall asleep independently and it would take an hour at bedtime for him to fall asleep. This is like day 5 of 1 nap. The first day was nap of 3.5 hr! Followed by crappy 1 hr naps each day for the last 3 days  and then yesterday and today were over 2 hours. Still having lots of NW. Yesterday he went to sleep after 6 hr AT (in bed after 5.5). So today we tried after 5 and went to sleep very quickly and the first time ever that he didn't cry and went to bed by himself alone. We've been holding his hand usually and trying to gradually withdraw. He is 13 months. He's getting his 11th tooth at the moment. Constantly teething this one!! So I know that's not helping. During the NW we put our hand through the railings to hold hand or pat him and he goes back to sleep. Wakes up very angry.  We end up feeding him if it is 3am or after since he's more awake. His nap he goes to sleep now with no crying or interventions after sleep training a while of gradual withdrawal. So crazy how naps and bedtime are different. Any advice on the NW?

Update: woke up this am @530 (11 hrs is pretty much his max... and usually more like 10.5) with one NW at 3am. I tried to put to bed alittle early (did seem to help not have the early bedtime NW like yesterday) but then I get an earlier wu so I need to stick to 7pm bedtime I suppose?

[jessmum46]

It may be if he is not much of a 12h night sleeper (my DD was but DS very rarely) then you will need to stick with a BT that gives you a reasonable WU and throw in some 2 nap days if you are getting an accumulation of tiredness x