Author Topic: what do I do?  (Read 1008 times)

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Offline ali11

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what do I do?
« on: May 16, 2006, 23:12:35 pm »
I'm sorry if this is the wrong board but I've got so many issues I'm not sure where to start.

I seem to have accidentally parented my beautiful 5 month old baby into every bad habit going and I really need some help to get back on track.  I'm feeling lost and quite useless at the moment.

He cannot go to sleep without a nipple in his mouth.  He can't nap for longer than 15 minutes unless I'm holding him, in which case he can sleep for about 90 mins. He wakes up every two hours for a feed at night and he won't sleep in his cot and cries until I bring him into bed with us.  I'm going back to work in six weeks and I'm scared rigid that no one else will be able to cope with him and he will suffer as a result....

It all fell apart after he got ill (he had itchy eczema on his scalp and would cry with discomfort for ages and not sleep) and then we went on holiday for 2 weeks and his routine just disintegrated.  Up until that point, I was following a 3 (ish) hour EASY starting at around 8 am in the morning.  However, he would always cluster feed in the evening starting at around 7pm after his bath and so wouldn't fall asleep properly until 10 pm.  Occassionally he would sleep from 11 pm to 5 am, but he usually woke up once or twice for food and went straight back to sleep.

There are so many difficulties I don't know where to start, and I would welcome any and all advice.  I love him very much and want to do the best by him and I feel as though I am failing him even though he is a happy baby.

Thank you for your time in advance.

Offline Richelle

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Re: what do I do?
« Reply #1 on: May 17, 2006, 14:05:29 pm »

Hi,

First, you are not a failure!  HUGS to you, I know it can be so stressful but hopefully we can help.

The first thing you need to do is teach him to go to sleep independently.  There are a few techniques to employ to help him learn to fall asleep.  Do have either of Tracy's books?  If so you know about pat/shhh and PUPD, if not there are PUPD boards on this site. 

Once your LO learns to fall asleep on his own eveything else will fall into place.  You may consider starting with either naps or night wakings.  I would start with naps as you are awake and it is easier to remain objective when not half asleep.  Start with developing a 'wind down' ritual that you will carry out before ALL naps.  The key is consistency and to have a PLAN and stick to it. 

You can do it, let us know if you have the books, or need help formulating a PLAN. 

Richelle
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Offline ali11

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Re: what do I do?
« Reply #2 on: May 17, 2006, 17:46:13 pm »
Thanks for your suggestions.  I do have the books and was doing quite well with him on EASY before the downhill slide.  It's just that I feel so overwhelmed by all the habits, I didn't know where, or how,  to start again. 

I'll start off as you recommended with his naps.  He's a screamer when he doesn't get his own way, so I may invest in a pair of earplugs first.....! 



Offline Richelle

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Re: what do I do?
« Reply #3 on: May 17, 2006, 18:55:07 pm »

Good Idea!  Also have you checked out the Getting Back on Track meesage boards?  They may have some great advice also!
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Offline Jaime

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Re: what do I do?
« Reply #4 on: May 17, 2006, 23:54:09 pm »
just wanted to mention quickly - here's a link with lots of information about stopping the nursing to sleep - scroll down a bit for the specifics, but it's all good info!  :D

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=52857.0
Jaime
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