Night wakings and early mornings - what to address first!

[JaneyB]

Hi everyone,
I have read lots of encouraging things on this website, but need a little more directed help.  I have a beautiful 1 year old, who has no problem in going to bed (at around 7pm), and settling herslef off to sleep.  However she still wakes for a feed anytime from about 1am to 4am.  She has also recently started waking up at 5am, and cries and cries until I go to her and she is awake for the day and ready to play.  However she is so tired then by about 8am she is ready for a nap.  I was about to start tackling the night feeding issue and start to dilute her feeds until hopefully she lost interest and stopped waking up for them,  But should i tackle the early wakings first?  Its all a bit of a mess at the moment, and I am not sure what is habit, whether she is hungry, etc..  She is walking now and will stand up in her cot and bang on it and cry until I come when she wakes.  She used to be able to play on her own and would only cry after about an hour, but not recently, she cries when she wakes and won't stop until she is taken out of her room.
Any suggestions on what I tackle first??
Thank you!

[Colin Macs Mom]

Have you looked over the sticky "How I stopped the night feeds with a 9  mo old?" That could really help you with weaning that night feed. As far as which to work on first... which bothers you more? Do you feel like the night feed might be disturbing her sleep and causing the early waking?

[JaneyB]

Hi Colin Mac's Mum,
I had started on that schedule a little while ago, but when Megan got sick and went off her food and was just drinking milk I stopped doing it thinking she might still 'need' that night feed.  But you are right, the night feeds bother me the most as she is now 1 and has always needed at least one, so last night when she woke at midnight (early by her standards) I gave her 5oz of milk in 7 of water, and she drank the whole bottle.  She then woke at 4,45, crying and wanting to get up but was clearly tired, so I pu/pd and stayed when she settled and kept creeping out of the room as she was nodding off.  Of course she woke up each time and cried again.  After an hour of this I heard her tummy grumbling so I gave her a bottle and after that she went straight off to sleep.  Only for 30 minutes, but I feel ok with it all.  I am going to persevere with the diluted bottles, following the same approach as the '9 month old' post, and if I can get her to stay in bed then great.  I am worried though that she really is hungry in the night but if she has a good breakfast, morning snack, lunch, afternoon bottle, tea, bottle and bed, she can't be can she?  She is not a large baby - I would say average size - and hasn't got a large appetite.

Its so difficult to know what the 'right' thing is to do!!!!!

[Colin Macs Mom]

Boy do I ever know what you mean about how hard it is to know the right thing to do!! 

Some los need a night feed longer than others and that's fine - the issue is determining whether that feed is NEEDED or not. If you hear her tummy growling then clearly she does need it and you should absolutely give it. At one year old though I would suspect that she's so used to that feed that she doesn't take enough during the day and therefore needs that night feed. When you start the weaning, you should see an increase in the daytime intake.

[JaneyB]

Hi Colin Mac's Mum
Just to update, things seem to be going along ok.  I seem to have 'solved' the early mornings, more by luck than judgement.  By not having such a big feed in the middle of the night, she is not needing to go to the loo, which I think was half the problem with the early wakings as she ALWAYS needed a nappy change, and then that was it, she was up for the day.  I have been doing to diluted feeds for 6 nights, and am down to 3 oz in 7 from tonight.  She is still waking for it, but not taking much and turning over and going to sleep quite quickly afterwards.  At least she is staying in bed until around 6.30am!  She is also taking more of her afternoon feed, and has an entire bottle when she first wakes up.
I daren't say it in case I break the spell, but I feel like I am getting somewhere!
Not sure where to go when I reach just water and she is still waking up, but I will leave that for another posting if it happens!!!!!
I will let you know how I get on with the last few days of the diluted feeds!
Take care and thanks for the words of encouragement!
Jane

[Colin Macs Mom]

Wonderful, I am glad that you are seeing improvement! 

[JaneyB]

Hi Colin Mac's Mum,
The night wakings have come to an end!  Hurray!  The diluted feeds worked.  It took 15 days and had to go down to water in the end but with each day she grew less interested in the feed and was awake for less and less time and would take a few gulps, and then turn over and go to sleep (I fed her in her cot as getting her out would wake her up more). Diluting the feeds was a much more gentle way of withdrawing the night feed and she never got distressed at all by it, which I suppose goes to show that it was more of a habit than out of hunger.  She now has a full feed when she wakes up.
Ok so onto my second problem, now the night feeds are resolved, how about the early mornings - lovely spirited little Megan won't sleep past about 5am!  She is ready to get up for the day, but then needs a nap by about 8am.  Its ok on days she doesn't go to nursery, but when she does I am trying to juggle the timings so she has a nap before she goes.  She goes to bed at 7pm and has done for months and months, and its impossible to keep her up after this time.  She has a blackout blind on her window so its not the summer mornings that are doing it.  The question is, if this is her normal getting up time then fine, I will just have to go to bed earlier, but if its something I can change, have you any suggestions?
Many thanks for all your advice and support so far,
Jane

[Colin Macs Mom]

Hi Jane,

So glad to hear that the diluted feeds were a success for you! Great news!!    For those early wakes though, you have a couple of choices. If she wakes at the same time or close each day, you could try wake to sleep. Or - I never personally tried this, but some people swear that if you put the lo to bed a touch earlier than normal, they'll sleep later. When she wakes, what is she doing? Is she hungry?