Morning nap problems

[erika]

Hi,

I've been reading all these posts and just knowing all of you are out there makes everything seem do-able!

Anyway, I have a 3 week-old dd (and a 14 mo ds) who I think is probably an angel baby (might be too soon to tell?) but we are having HUGE problems with her morning nap. I put her on EASY the moment we got home from the hospital and have always put her down in the crib for her naps using shush/pat. This is her schedule:

7:30 wake up (usually on her own) and bottle
8:45/9:00 Nap

10:30 Bottle
11:45 Nap

1:30 Bottle
2:45/3 Nap

4:30 Bottle

Catnaps in bouncy chair while we eat dinner

7:00 Bottle
7:30 Bath and wind-down
8 Bottle and bed

Wakes up on her own at 11, 2 and 5 (usually every three hours on the dot!)

We really worked on this schedule to make it jive with my son's day. For instance, I can't feed Sophia while I'm feeding my son.

The two issues we have are what to do when she wakes up at 5:30 (or even 6am) wanting to eat. Sometimes I can give her a pacifier and sit by her and she'll last about 45 minutes, but she's so young that I feel I should feed her. But then it messes up her breakfast feed at 7:30. Anyway, she seems to be waking on her own at 7am, so that might be a better wake-up time for her. It's also difficult to put her down for her first nap with my son around, because he's hard to keep occupied and inevitably gets into trouble. I can resolve that (keeping him in a contained area with toys or something), but I don't know that he would last the 40 minutes or more it usually takes. I know from doing this with my son that it takes a big time commitment, but even if I sit by her and pat and shush she still wakes constantly. I'll think she's asleep, and then 10-15 minutes later she's up again, crying. Finally we've arrived at her next feeding time, and then she's exhausted. Her next two naps are easy and we have to wake her to eat. She's also fantastic at night, just waking to eat and then going back to sleep. Although when she woke up at 5:30am today it took a bit of shushing and patting to get her back to sleep until 7am, when she'd had it. Any ideas why her morning nap is so tricky? With my son it was the easiest nap of the day! I wish I had more time for a wind-down before her nap, but it's hard with a 14 month-old around who likes to climb things. Any advice and suggestions would be so appreciated!

[avery's momma]

my lo couldn't handle much A time at all i think ... someone on this website told me 40mns from wake to back in bed.. it really helped little avery for me to keep that time frame for her.. or better yet, keep a close eye on her sleepy cues- which may be tricky with the 14mo ds! it really made a big difference in her naps if i got her down immediately after her first yawn (or earlier if i noticed some other sleepy sign) good luck!

[erika]

Thank you so much for all your advice! I don't know why I couldn't figure this out myself, but I guess I was getting too wrapped up in getting my son his breakfast, and I was just waiting for the nanny to come at 9am before I put her down. This morning I put her down at 8am, one hour after she woke up, and she was asleep by 8:30 but even before that never cried or fussed, just lay there with her eyes wide open.

So now my question is when were you able to just plop your baby down in her crib and leave her to fall asleep on her own? It was just a year ago that I did this with my son but I can't remember. I remember days where I'd spend 45 minutes or so shushing and patting, and then magically one day it all fell into place and he fell asleep on his own, but I really can't remember when that was. And I'm nervous to try it because if I leave her before she's fully asleep, she might wake up and fuss and then never be able to get back to sleep. Obviously she's still so little now.

Just having our first successful morning nap makes my day!! Isn't it ridiculous how that kind of thing can change our moods so much?? But it gives me renewed motivation to be patient. Thanks again!

[avery's momma]

so glad your lo had a good nap today! it really does put me in the best mood when she sleeps well!!

i started early with avery putting her down for naps while she was still awake, and i had not read bw at that point, so i was not aware of pat-shh techniques, and to be honest with you.. she started putting herself to sleep right away.. people kept telling me that not all babies were like that.. and that the next one might not be so easy, but in my opinion, it is much easier to start now (teaching them to fall asleep) than when they are older. in the middle of the night, when she would wake for a feed, i was in the habit of letting her fall asleep on my chest before putting her down, and a friend with older kids advised me to go ahead and put her down awake. she said that she had rocked her son to sleep for like 3 months, and it took 3 solid weeks of crying to get him out of the habit and that it would take about 3 nights at my lo's age to break the habit (i think she was about 3 weeks old) ... i started that night and she was right.. after 3 nights or so of a little crying (not hard crying) she figured it out!!

the best piece of advice i can give you is to watch your lo's sleepy signs. that was (and still is) the biggest factor in her learning to fall asleep on her own. if i am too late, it is much harder for her to fall asleep on her own, but if i get her down while she is drowsy, it makes it much easier for her to learn how to fall asleep in that and future naptimes.

i recommend dr. weisbluth's book, healthy sleep habits, happy child.. it has lots of great info in there esp about sleepy signs..

hope today is going great for you!!

[erika]

Thank you for your responses!

Actually, she had a great morning nap was great, but then the second nap fell apart and she woke up early and couldn't go back to sleep--it almost seems like one of her naps is going to be off. Today was worse, since my mother-in-law left and it was our first morning on our own so it was a real struggle to get dd to sleep while ds was playing. He was surprisingly quiet, but he'd escape into the living room and I'd hear a crash and run out of the bedroom to make sure he was okay. And then of course Sophie would wake up.... That happened repeatedly. Or my son would screech and she'd jolt awake. I finally got her to sleep, but only for 30 minutes because she was hungry, having woken at 6am, when I fed her and put her back to sleep and then of course when she woke for good at 7:15 or so (her internal clock tells her that's her wake-up time) she only ate 1 1/2 ounces. So I think I should have just given her a tiny bit of milk just to tide her over until 7am. Otherwise it starts a vicious cycle of not napping because of hunger, and then being too tired to really eat enough and falling asleep too soon and then waking early again! I'm going to blockade the hallway tomorrow though so that my son can't get out and into trouble. I guess this will all take time...