Separation Anxiety

[sofiasmommy]

Hi All!

I did read the post in the FAQ about how to handle separation anxiety.....I will try the walk in/walk out for our next nap, BUT my problem I forsee is that she screams as soon as I take my hand off of her and turn around. My LO has been great at just being put into her crib and then going to sleep, sometime with just a couple minutes of crying to shut the world out! She has stopped the screaming for going to bed, but not for naps! I am convinced it is separation anxiety, so I am not sure how to handle it. She has never been good wit pu/pd....I scratch her back and she will calm down, but I don't want it to become a prop, so I try to stop it before she falls asleep, used to work, but now she starts to scream!!

ANY HELP OUT THERE?? She already is not the best napper, but we had made so much progress and now it seems to be all out the door!!

TIA!!!!
KATI

[Jaime]

hi,

i would continue to do as you have been - soothe her (scratching her back) until she stops crying, and then probably just turn around.  sounds like you won't be able to walk away just yet. 

like is says in the FAQ, this will take a long time the first couple days, but if you can hang in there, it will get better.

HTH 

[Johno & Aurelias Mum]

I agree with Jaime, its never a quick solution with SA.  What's she like during the day.  You really need to work on it then too so that she gets used to the whole being separate issue when she's not tired and needing sleep.

[sofiasmommy]

Thanks to both of you for the advice!

The during the day naps is where we have the most problems. Going to bed, she has actually stopped the excessive crying, but she is just refusing naps!!! If I let her sleep in my arms she would, but as soon as I put her down, even if she is asleep she wakes up screaming!! However, we're working on it! Lots of back scratching and mommy gently pushing her head back to the mattress. Poor girl! She is tired, but ohhhhhh soooooo stubborn!!

THANKS AGAIN!

[Michaela's Mom]

I know exactly how you feel. I'm also having problems with SA at the moment. DD will go down for naps, but wakes soon afterwards, lifts herself up and if she can't see anyone, starts crying - the moment someone walks in, she's all smiles again. At night, she wakes up,  lifts herself up to a sitting position so she can look around, sees me right next to her and then goes back to sleep. She will also roll over in bed (yes, she sleeps with me ... naughty mommy  ), reach for me, cling onto me for dear life and then go back to sleep.

I actually thought she was getting better because she has never cried when i leave for work, however, i had to eat my words this morning when she started crying when i left for work - i was heartbroken and it took everything i had not to rush back, grab her and cuddle her - i carried on walking, got in my car and drove away - i thought i would just die, leaving her there crying for me.   

Anyway, like everything with babies, i know this is just a phase she's going through and i can only reassure her that i'll be back and that everything will be ok whilst i'm gone.

Sharon

[sofiasmommy]

Glad my LO is not the only one, thanks Sharon! Also, if it makes you feel any better, she won't ever remember that you left her to go to work when she gets older, she'll only remember how happy she always was when she was with you when you got back! HTH!