what to do when he goes off track

[nicolas]

Hi all,
I am new EASY mom, we started about a week and a half ago, and have had some excellent EASY days, and some not so excellent.
My 11 week old and I had to relearn how to do things.  He was a total snacker, (ate on demand at random times throughout the day, we put him to sleep by bfing, and his long afternoon nap of 2-3 hours was beside me in the bed.  Sh-patting works great for us, although sometimes it takes a long time, especially if he is overtired.  

This is where I get confused.  I know it is ok to have a EASAE schedule, but it seems like we get off so easily and then I don't know what to do next.  His naps used to be long (when he was sleeping on the breast and up against my body) and now they are 45 minutes average.  He also has a hard time eating for longer than 10 or 15 minutes.  This ends up affecting the timing of things.

IF YOU ARE OFF TRACK, HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO NEXT?  I know the objective is to raise a happy baby who can depend on a structured predictable routine, but does that mean the main structureis to do one after the other, even if the length of sleep, eat, or activity is shorter than recommended?  Or is the base of the routine to keep feedings 3 hours apart?  

Today, Nicolas awoke from his nap after 15 minutes and was very awake.  The result was that his nap was thrown off, then when he was unconsolable I fed him, and an hour later, he passed out on my shoulder. So not only was our bf times off, but his nap as well.  So when he woke, I wasn't really sure if it was E or A time.  WHEN HE GOES OFF TRACK, DO I JUST TRY AND FOLLOW HIS CUES AND DO MY BEST TO START A NEW CYCLE OF EAS?  

It is such a frustrating feeling when you really want to meet your baby's needs, but you aren't sure what they are at the given moment.  I really want to maintain EAS from day to day, but it seems like we have had more days that go wrong than days that go right, so I end up feeling confused (and sometimes exhausted.)

If anyone has any suggestions, or similar stories, I would love to hear them.

sincerely wanting EASY to be easier, Liana

[Meggie]

I am sorry things are so hard.  I don't know that I will have any good advise, but it will be easier for everyone to answer if you could post your routine (or what you are trying to do).  There are many things that can throw off EASY, from the wrong feeding intervals, overtiredness and growth spurts.  Could you LO be having a growth spurt?  If he is, then you need to roll with the punches a bit until it is over.  He will be feeding more often and it will throw off your "routine" but when it is over then he will go back easily to it.  If you feeding times or sleep times are off, your routine will help us to determine that.
(((Hugs))) The first 3 months are the hardest on EASY, then things start falling into place for most LOs.

[nicolas]

Thanks for the quick reply Meghan!

Today was soo off that it is not worth posting, as one off thing kept leading us further off track.  Tomorrow, I will do my best to keep a decently regular day adn then I'll post our times. 
P.S.  I read through a few apges of teh 45 minute support thread, but I wasn't able to get an idea of what you do about feeding times when they take short naps.  Should I just put some more A time in before and after his naps?

[rebecaq]

Hi Liana,

Big {{{HUGS}}}

Your ds is acutally doing pretty well for an 11 week old, and one who had tons of accidental parenting at that.  It's only been on EASY for a week and a half. Most times it can take up to 21 days for the routine to really settle in.  Don't be too hard on yourself.

For when things don't go as planned, try your best to stick to the part of the routine you are in. If he wakes 15 minutes after putting him down then Tracy suggests you do shh/pst for the remainder of the nap time.  Even if he doesn't actually drift off. This sounds like a death sentence  and I won't kid you it will take a lot of time, energy and patience, BUT it does pay off and help both of you to stick with the routine.
If you're trying to break the boob=sleep association then I strongly recommend to only offer the breast only when he's truly hungry. Not in the need to suckle or doze off.


I think it's great your stopping by the naps boards to get help!  Remember to mention that you just started EASY, that will help the nap mods to help you better.

- Beca