tantrum yells and WI/WO

[brightside]

Jo: thank you so much for you support

Rinajack: I think you are right that we have to LISTEN. We need to do what we feel is right in our gut for our LOs, regardless of the 'rules'.

I totally appreciate that there will be mixed advice because everyone's LO is different and most people are just telling what works for them. I gratefully receive the different strategies and pick what I think will work for us. Having said that I think I'm just going to do what I FEEL is right and stop trying to tweak this and that and getting anal about times and routines and x amount of hours sleep and props and everything else that has made me so obsessive and paranoid about everything.

[JoC]

Me too!
Never been so paranoid in all my life!
I am having sleep issues at the moment know how you are feeling.
Jox

[Katet]

Cath, I totally understand where you are at... I read your post before I took ds#1 to hospital with an asthma attack & so I have had time to think of a response... but Rinajack has said it all... wi/wo is not a method in tracey's books, it is one in an interview & it is basically for toddlers that "play" while parents try to do GW or pd. when you "time" the amount of time you leave you stop doing one of Tracey's golden rules "listen" & respond to their need... a child who takes over an hour to extend a sleep isn't about them being tired it is about them "feeling" they have slept & confusion... I've tried to extend naps & all it did was cause me upset.
I too many times (even with my 2nd) have become obsessed with tweeking routines... now all I do is "know" how much sleep he gets on average in 24hours & if he wakes at 7, has a 1.5 hour nap, he needs bed before 7.15pm... if he naps wakes early & naps less then earlier... he works best on 13.25hours sleep & so we roll with that... in the 2-1 nap switch we had many 5pm bedtimes & even now approaching 21mo, we actually still have 2naps on odd occasions as I have to fit mt 3yo needs too.

[rinajack]

I agree definitely about routine tweaking.  I dont' do it at all.  I do stress over gross changes like 2-1 switch, and awful sleep at daycare, but at home, 15 mins here or there, or even 1/2 hr, to my DD makes absolutely no difference, so we just roll with it.

I do not have set nap times, I only go by cues.  If nothing else, I am much more relaxed about how our day is going, and this probably rubs off on DD too.

It is hard to choose what you think will work for you.  And it may even take some experimentation, but with everything, you will need to try it at least a week I think.  And if you listen, you will soon know if it is effective for you or not.

[brightside]

Thank you for your replies. I feel better now and have decided to just go with the flow and go back to following my gut.

Kate: I hope your DS is ok after his asthma attack-scary.