E.A.S.Y. makes my life only harder?!

[Larissa london]

Have been on EASY for 7 days and gets harder and harder to get a 6.5 w.o. to go to nap after 3pm. His napping time is shrinking and my patting time has gone from recommended 20 min to now endless. My "Y" time is basically now all shushing and patting, hardly go outdoors trying to keep to the routine, and sit in darkened room isolating all stimulators.   
It seems just that now i have replaced one props with others that are not working. PLease help with advice.
thanks in advance,
First time mom
Routing standard 3h starting at 7AM with two NW at midnight (midnight and 3:30 for feed) and clusterfeeding at 18:30 and 20:00.

[RachelC]

Hi and welcome to the boards!

Can you give more detail to your routine?  How long is each E, A and S?

[*Mona*]

hi

how old is your baby? newborn or slightly older?
like Rachel has said, can you give more detail on his routine?

[Larissa london]

Hi, thanks for replying and sorry to be a moaner.
Routine:
E 7am to 7:30
A 7:30 to 8 (including 5-10 min windi-down times every set)
S 8:00 (about an hour of REM and last half an hour deep)
E 10am to 10:30
A 10:30
S 11 (same as above)
E 13:00
A 13:30
S  14:00 (that is when it starts falling asleep/getting awake/ constant shushing, or patting, or rocking)
E 16:00
A 16:30
S 17:00 (catnap - tried 40 min but sleeps no longer than 20 in last three days)
E 18:00 or 18:30
Bath 18:30 or 19:00
E 19:00 or 19:30
Sleep after an hour of rocking, shushing and patting at 20:30 or 21:00
FIrst NW is at 0:30 to feed
Second at 3:30
Used to be 2 am and 4am but i started moving it slowly to introduce DF

My son is 6.5 weeks old and we have been on the routine for 7 days. Thanks again for your help, wise ones!

[*Mona*]

hi Larissa

sorry for getting back to you so late.

actually I think his routine looks really goon considered he's 7 weeks old and you've just started.
2 NWs is perfectly normal at his age.
a bit tough afternoons/evenings are somewhat a norm too. IT WILL GET EASIER, trust me. it is hard at the beginning but all your hard work will finally lead you to your goals- independent sleep, steady routine.

try maybe putting him down 15 or so minutes later in the afternoon. might help. and 20 minute catnap is ok too- looks like he just doesn't need more.

if you try to get him to sleep and he doesn't want to- just try to step back a bit, let him lie in his crib or walk him around your house in your arms with no shush/pat etc. sometimes it is can be so frustrating when your baby doesn't sleep or nap when you want him to BUT it's him who knows best when he's tired enough to go down easily so SLOW down a bit

you ARE doing great.

hth
Monika

[Shellha]

Hi Monika

Congrats on your LO, you must be very proud! I had MAJOR problems with my LO around this age and felt like I was forever patting a shhing (usually with him screaming). I now wish that I had tried to be a bit less strict with myself (and him) so that we were both less stressed.

Can I suggest that in the afternopon, when you are supposed to be getting him to cat nap, that you go for a walk, or out in the car (I notice you are in London so that 20min cat nap could turn into an 1.5hr drive with traffic). I remember reading in the BW books that the afternoon nap is a freebie - eg not cot based, so get out and enjoy the sunshine, while it lasts.

Your routine does look good, and 2 NWs is awesome at this stage of your DSs life.

I can look back now and say with confidence that it really does get better. As I said we had a terrible time with my DS but he now sleeps independently, is a very happy child, goes down to sleep without a peep and adapts to different sleeping environments well.

Hang in there, throw the book away for a few days if you feel you need to, and when you are ready come back to it cause the ideas behind the routine are very good.

You are doing a great job - your DS is very lucky to have a Mummy that only wants the best for him

Shell

[stridey]

Hi there, Larissa, I totally agree with Shell and Monika. Wow, you are doing such an awesome job and getting right in there from the beginning. You will have it 'sussed' in no time at all. We found with our DD that from about 3 weeks till she was about 10 weeks that she slept very little during 3pm - 7pm, maybe for 2 X 30mins and wanted to feed every 2 hours instead of her usual 2.5 - 3hrs. I was so confused and stressed and really felt like I must have been doing something wrong until my wise dad came along and said 'well I guess your DD just doesn't want to sleep during those hours'. Don't you hate that when the men are so practical and straight forward!!!!! and I stopped stressing about it. Instead of spending the time shush, shushing and pat, patting I got her up and we had some great chats and fun and feed every two hours and if I read her signs and caught them I popped her off to bed.

I think it is nice when someone else comes along and makes a decision, husbands, mums dads whomever, as it seems like we are making them all day long. Sometimes, I think, as women we over analysis things. I know I do within an inch and I am abit of a 'control freak'. I found it really hard to deviate from the routine but sometimes the book just needs to be 'chucked out the window' and confidence in yourself and your LO will come quicker than you believe, especially as you are so tuned into your LO’s needs so early on.

Our DD has always been a pretty good sleeper during the rest of the day and at night.....and 2NW is great at your stage, so don't worry about it. She is now sleeping through what we call the 'witching hours' and it is bliss. I know it's not always what you want to hear when you are in this situation but things will get better and seriously you are doing soooooo well. With such a great start things will only improve and as I read on another thread.....E.A.S.Y. will beginning to work for you rather than you working for E.A.S.Y.

Take care and try to get out in that English Sunshine!!!!! I lived in the U.K. for 4 years the sunshine can be short lived.

Cheers
Kiwi from NZ