where is the light?

[Penut's Mom]

Hi - I have a 6.5 month old dd and last night was one of the hardest nights we've had.

She is on a 4 hour easy with the exception of short naps. Last week it looked like she was sorting herself out there by extending them all on her own. (I knew I shouldn't have celebrated so much    ... then this week we were back the 30-45 min marker. She is bf and solids were introduced 1 week shy of 6 months with no apparent issues.

Milestones... she is rolling over from front to back with ease. She can sit up independently.

Teeth... I think they are going up and down. She chews on her hands a lot and if she is doing this before bed/nap then we give teething tabs.

PU/PD - I am a big whimp and have not been able to be consistent with this. I have had success with holding her till she is super sleepy then laying her in the crib. The past few days as soon as I lay her down she cries and flails her arms and legs.

On Friday I went out for dinner with a friend and dh got to 'play' parent. She apparently cried for 3 hours with him trying everything. She was not consolable at all unless he left her room and then she stopped crying and thought they were going to play.

yesterdays routine was out of whack and looked like...
7E
7:45 A
8:10 solids cereal and fruit
8:25 low key A
9- S
9:40 awake. tried to extend the nap with no luck.
10:20 car ride - heading out to a friends for brunch. thought she would fall asleep in the car but no.
11 E - too much comotion... did not seem to eat a lot.
12 solids
12:45 more milk and nap
1:30 awake and spent some chill time out in the shade with daddy
2:30 another car ride and still no sleep.
3 E
3:30 low key A
4 Cat nap
4:20 low key A
5:00 solids  - just 1 tbsp of veg and 1/2 tbsp of fruit
5:30 milk
bath
6:00 top up and bed by 6:30 (usual bedtime is 7:30)

She woke at 9. Tried to get back to sleep (flailing arms and legs whenever laid down in the crib - don't forget screaming). After 45 min I gave her some milk and she went to sleep no problems after that.
She woke at 11 and I was successful at getting her back to sleep with a quick hug and giving her the soother.
She woke at 12:15 and she wouldn't even take the soother. She just screamed and kicker her legs. At 12:50 I ended up giving her some milk.
She woke at 1:47 and at around 3:30 I gave her some milk. She slept till 7.

Normally I will give her a df at 10 and then she wakes once more in the night. Sometimes at 1:30, 2:30 OR 5.

I know she is overtired (me too). I just need to know how I can get her to catch up on her sleep.

Sorry so long. Thanks for 'listening'.

[Colin Macs Mom]

PU/PD - I am a big whimp and have not been able to be consistent with this. I have had success with holding her till she is super sleepy then laying her in the crib. The past few days as soon as I lay her down she cries and flails her arms and legs.

This is definitely part of your problem. If you're going to do PU/PD you absolutely must be consistent, and commit to it. If not, it will backfire big time. You also don't want to be holding her until she's really sleepy and then putting her down. For her to achieve true independent sleep, she needs to go down as awake as possible and be able to fall asleep on her own. It doesn't sound like she's able to do that yet. You also don't want to be feeding her back to sleep all night long either. At 6.5 months she surely doesn't need to eat all night.

How similar is the routine that you posted to a normal routine?

[Penut's Mom]

I guess I should clarify we haven't done pu/pd a lot. We tried it once and after 2 hours and no success we resorted back to hold and place in crib.

I should also clarify the we... truly it is me only. My dh does not get up with her and this past Friday was his second attempt at getting her to sleep w/o me. he used to help when she was a newborn but for the past 6months she has only known me.

To be honest I am chicken to do pu/pd. I don't know how to get beyond it. I know it needs to be done though so.... how do I start. DO I start now... when she seems to be experiencing some SA or do I wait till she is back to trusting me more?

Our routine is typically ...
7E
7:45 A
8:15 Solids
8:30 A
9 Sleep
9:50 wake - attempt to extend
10:10 low key A unless nap extended
11 E
11:30 A
12 Lunch
12:30 A - head to pool/walk in stroller/floor time
1 - 1:30 nap (length of nap is anywhere from 40-1.5)
3 E
3:30 A
4 dinner
4:30 depending on 1pm nap... she may go for a cat nap here or at 5.
5:30 milk - bm
6 bath
6:30 top up and in bed for 7

df at 10.
she wakes one more time throughout the night - varied times.

Another thing I should mention... for the past 2-3 weeks she has been a jumping bean before bed and naps. She will literally lean against me and bounce like a little jumping bean or lay in my arms and try to jump.

Thanks...

[Colin Macs Mom]

I guess I should clarify we haven't done pu/pd a lot. We tried it once and after 2 hours and no success we resorted back to hold and place in crib.

It will take a lot more than two hours to see success, so if you decide you can and want to go the PU/PD route, know that it's a committment and will take some time before you see the results.

I should also clarify the we... truly it is me only. My dh does not get up with her and this past Friday was his second attempt at getting her to sleep w/o me. he used to help when she was a newborn but for the past 6months she has only known me.

I see - are you ok with this arrangement?

To be honest I am chicken to do pu/pd. I don't know how to get beyond it. I know it needs to be done though so.... how do I start. DO I start now... when she seems to be experiencing some SA or do I wait till she is back to trusting me more?

She's too young yet for SA, but what do you mean about her trustung you more?

If you have specific questions about PU/PD, you definitely want to check out the PU/PD forum. There's a lot of how-to stuff there as well as support.

Our routine is typically ...
7E
7:45 A
8:15 Solids
8:30 A
9 Sleep
9:50 wake - attempt to extend
10:10 low key A unless nap extended
11 E
11:30 A
12 Lunch
12:30 A - head to pool/walk in stroller/floor time
1 - 1:30 nap (length of nap is anywhere from 40-1.5)
3 E
3:30 A
4 dinner
4:30 depending on 1pm nap... she may go for a cat nap here or at 5.
5:30 milk - bm
6 bath
6:30 top up and in bed for 7

df at 10.
she wakes one more time throughout the night - varied times.

Is it possible that she's hungry during the night? How much does she take at each feed during the day?

Another thing I should mention... for the past 2-3 weeks she has been a jumping bean before bed and naps. She will literally lean against me and bounce like a little jumping bean or lay in my arms and try to jump.

My DS did that around that age as well. It seems to be part of the mobility stuff, like pre-pulling up and pre-crawling. Learning to use their limbs you know?

[Penut's Mom]

HI -

Yes I know you are right that it will take more than 2 hours. I think after last night dh 'gets' it and is going to be more on board for helping with the sleep training.

I know that he would like to help but feels helpless w/o the ability to feed her.

The reason I was thinking SA - is from me going out on Friday and this sleep craziness occurring thereafter. Trust... just me leaving and not being there. Thinking she is freaking out when I goto lay her in the crib... just need to remind her that I will be there for her.

I will check out the pu/pd forum and see what I can absorb.

I did not mention that she is a puker/ happy chucker and we are due to see a pediatrition. She does not seem bothered by it and does not get sick at night. I am going to hold off with pu/pd till we see the ped - not sure if that is just me making another excuse thought... I'll have to think on that a little 

As to the hunger question... she eats well during each feed. she generally empties both breasts. One hour after each daytime feed (7 -8, 11-12, 3-4) she eats solids. She is only eating 2-3 tbs of cereal and fruit, chicken, fruit and veggies and then veggies and fruit.

I'm not too sure where I could offer her more milk. I could go into her room at 9 and then again at 11... but I was trying to move away from 11... we got up to 10? Where would you suggest I add more? or should I up the solids?

I was guessing the jumping bean stuff was movement related. I've been trying to giver her as much floor time as possible.

She has mighty rosy cheeks right now... wondering if there is a little tooth trying to poke out???

Oh I would love an instruction manual. 

 

[Colin Macs Mom]

I know that he would like to help but feels helpless w/o the ability to feed her.

Actually, quite often Daddies have a much easier time resettling or handling the sleep training because LO doesn't associate Dad with food.   Particularly if LO is breastfed.

The reason I was thinking SA - is from me going out on Friday and this sleep craziness occurring thereafter. Trust... just me leaving and not being there. Thinking she is freaking out when I goto lay her in the crib... just need to remind her that I will be there for her.

Don't worry, it's definitely not SA if that gives you any comfort.

I did not mention that she is a puker/ happy chucker and we are due to see a pediatrition. She does not seem bothered by it and does not get sick at night. I am going to hold off with pu/pd till we see the ped - not sure if that is just me making another excuse thought... I'll have to think on that a little 

Ahhh yes, definitely something to discuss with the ped. Have you elevated one end of her mattress? She may be getting a little heartburn at night from laying flat, even if she's a happy spitter.

As to the hunger question... she eats well during each feed. she generally empties both breasts. One hour after each daytime feed (7 -8, 11-12, 3-4) she eats solids. She is only eating 2-3 tbs of cereal and fruit, chicken, fruit and veggies and then veggies and fruit.

I'm not too sure where I could offer her more milk. I could go into her room at 9 and then again at 11... but I was trying to move away from 11... we got up to 10? Where would you suggest I add more? or should I up the solids?

In that case I wouldn't make any changes. Intake sounds about right for her age.

I was guessing the jumping bean stuff was movement related. I've been trying to giver her as much floor time as possible.

Perfect

She has mighty rosy cheeks right now... wondering if there is a little tooth trying to poke out???

 

Maybe - can you feel anything in her mouth?

[Penut's Mom]

Hi - well last night was better than the night before and that is a relief for me. She only woke 3 times and it did not take long to get her back to sleep and only had to  feed 2x . It is strange though that she woke at 8:45pm... she keeps getting earlier and earlier. Yet she didn't cat nap so I moved her bedtime up. I also could not resettle her with out a bf. She did not fall asleep on the breast. She pulled herself off and tried to cuddle into me. I put her into the crib and she fussed for a bit but fell asleep.

How do you manage that? By moving her bedtime up to 6:30 instead of 7-7:30 that resulted in a 8:45pm wake up and a 6am start to the day versus 7? My dh let her play in bed till 6:30 thinking she might resettle but alas no.

She was able to resettle herself at 1am. I was so excited it was hard to go back to sleep. Yet she woke again 1 hour later and instead of her calling for me with he blah blah she went straight to full blown crying.

I have given my dh the task of reading up on pu/pd and I think we are going to give it a go. It is critical that she learns to sleep on her own. We are going to try this Thursday... I'll  take the first 2 days and then he is here on the weekend for the next two.

We used to have her bed on an incline - due to a cold. She kept rolling into the sides of her crib and my dh reduced the incline as soon as her congestion was gone. I'll try to put another book under there tonight to see if there is a difference.

I'm convinced about the teeth. It just seems like the drool and the amount of fist chewing has increased. We gave her a teething stick with the gel on it and she went to town on it. Perhaps the pain reduction was the reason for an easier bedtime transition.

Anyway... thank you for your help. I'm sure I'll be back with Thursday coming... but I will use the pu/pd forum.

Many thanks, T