10 MO EARLY EARLY wakings helllllp!!!!

[jennie marie]

My DS is 10 ˝ months old and we are just doing the final stages of teaching him to sleep.  I have done it very gradually.  He got to 8 months old feeding to sleep then I discovered the BW book and introduced many of the techniques and weaned him off feeding to sleep – he was waking 1-2 hourly and I was at breaking point!!!  Didn’t quite take all props away though and replaced the feeding/boob with rocking on our arms but as he was sleeping so much better we thought we could continue to so this??!!

He now sleeps 10 hours straight which is a HUGE improvement and I was so happy with that, we didn’t change anything else but I knew in the back of my mind that it wasn’t quite enough!  Now he is getting too big to hold in my arms and too squirmy! And we are still having some sleep problems – nothing like it used to be that is why it has taken me another 2 months to do something about it!!!

He wakes VERY early – anywhere from 4.15-5.30AM!!!  Generally it is 5am/occasionally 5.30am and 2/3 times a week 4 something??!!  So I need to deal with early wakings.
Also his day naps are very very short – 30 mins – 40 mins and some days 1 ˝ hours if I am very lucky.  Sometimes he doesn’t even go to sleep for the afternoon sleep.
These are the 2 things I need to work on AND his routine and that is where I am CONFUSED .

SO I am in the process of doing the final step in teaching him settle himself, started with PU/PD on the weekend with my DH doing all the day sleeps and me at night.  It has been going OK lots of crying but he is getting it and still sleeping 10 hours or so straight.  I am happy with our progress there – it has only been 2 days so I am giving it a good week before I analyse it too much, but I am so unsure as to what to do with his routine, as I know this plays a huge role.  Can someone please help.
He used to wake up happy and rearing to go at 5am so we just accepted that this was his wake up time but lately he wakes up tired and grumpy and it is so hard to get him back to sleep and he is so used to us getting him up.  What to do?
Here is his ROUGH routine:  I will do on a 5am wake as that is fairly usual??!!
5am wake
5.30 BF
6.30 Breakfast - solids
8ish Sleep for 30-40 mins
9.30 Bf and MTea-solids snack
11.30 lunch – solids
1ish sleep – 40 mins if we are lucky
3 ATea –solids snack
5.15 dinner – solids
5.45 bath and bed time routine
6.15 bottle top up 60mls then BF
6.30 SLEEP

ALL these times are ‘ish’ and never the same 2 days running (except dinner/bath.bed and that is working perfectly)
I just get so confused as he wakes different times every day and so early – do I feed and carry on with breakfast at that ungodly hour or do I from now on decide on a strict schedule and stick to it religiously for a week or so to get him in the pattern – i.e. up at 6 and if he wakes earlier do PU/PD and so on for the day?  So hard to stick to EASY as his sleeps are so unpredictable.
A 6am wake up would be IDEAL!!!  It has got to the point where we are very happy with 5am!!!
Arghhhhhhhh sorry but I just can’t work it out and it is frustrating me.  I’m still catching up on 9 months of no sleep!!!  Am more tired than ever.
So appreciate anyone out there that could help!!!!
Thanks – tired and confused mum.

[debo620]

Hi there, a few things that helped us with early wakings were:

1. leave him in his crib as long as possible
2. breastfeed him a little later every day, until it is more at 6/6:30


I think the pm nap is too late considering the am nap is early and short, and then the pm nap is short from overtired. there is a long srecth from 1:40 until 6:30 bedtime on a 40min nap which can also cause the early wakes.

at 10months, a 40min am nap works well for many, and then longer nap at 1pm, so I actually would push the am nap out a bit

try
wake 5
nap 9-9:40
nap asleep by 1pm-hopefully he'll sleep til 2:30 or so
bed 6:30ish

[jennie marie]

thanks so much for your time and help
I do leave him for as long as possible in the morning and he only plays by himself for about 10 mins.  That is on the days where he wakes happy - not many!  Otherwise it's pretty fast and furious screaming.  Have tried feeidng him and putting back to sleep but that doesn't work either.  I will try stretching out the BF though - what do I do with him in the mean time - quiet play/dim lighting etc in his room or take him out and up for the day when he wakes then BF 6ish?

I do like your idea of stretching out the morning nap but he gets really tired again by about 6.30-7am (which tells me that he should of slept another hour??) we tried putting him down again at this time but then he had 3 naps that day and they were all off schedule and caused havoc at bed times/feeding times.  Would he not be overtired at 9am and hard to get to sleep?  I have never done it so should give it a try - willing to try anything!

[debo620]

well I think the idea would be to do things gradually,

1. so pick not out of crib til 5:30 and you can go in reassure and leave. if he is happy and playing, great, if he is crying then go back in etc. Does he have a lovey? that aways helped over here. and then you can move on to 5:45 etc. do you think he is waking because of hunger? is he bf well before bed, eating solids?
and then delay the first bf in much the same way, just delay by 10 min every few day

he probably will get OT by 9am, definately don't offer a nap at 7am, just move the am nap forward to 8:15, 8:30..... etc. move it forward every few days,

[jennie marie]

thanks - yeah I like gradually
OK will try not getting out of crib until 5.30 - there will be alot of crying - do i go in and resettle like a sleep time or resettle and play and wait till he's happy, then leave? - usually if i leave the room just for the toilet he screams the house down.

I don't think he is waking hungry - he has a good solids dinner and a bottle top up then a breastfeed just before sleep.  I am sure he can go without the BF until 6am.  I think he is waking out of habit and also out of no skills to self settle when still tired which I am right now working on so maybe it will all right itself once we have done the self settling for a while.

So do you suggest I start my EASY day routine at 6am?  and stick to the feed times and do my best with the sleep times gradually moving the morning sleep till later and get the afternoon started by 1pm?  would that about sum it up - I tend to confuse things more than necessary!!!

[debo620]

yes, I think that sums it up. you are working towards a 6am start and as such your feed times and naps sort of work from that 6am goal.

no you don't play at 5:30am, you leave the lights off, resettle when necessary and leave.
if you think he is still tired and lacks the skills to go back to sleep, then I would do exactly what you do at other sleep times. then at the desired wake time (hopefully closer to 6am) you make a big deal of it with lights, opening blinds, lots of "good morning" etc.

[jennie marie]

thats brilliant - thanks so much for taking the time to help me.  will give all that a go over the next week and stay consistent - i think that is the key isn't it?    will let you know how I get on.

PS I love your LO's name Noah - it was the next one of our choices!!

[debo620]

Thanks!
Good Luck!