Author Topic: Hi I'm new here and I have a toddler who won't sleep on her own!!  (Read 988 times)

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Offline jvcq1212

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Hi everyone!! I'm a proud parent of a 23 month old toddler and I'm in need of some help! My mom came across the Baby Whisperer book last week and I've had the time to read some of it. Now I know it's recommended to read the book from the beginning to end but my sleep is starting to get deprived. haha. So, I went straight to the toddler section and haven't been able to read too much. So, I'm here in hope that maybe someone could help OR just to vent ;D. So, here's my story:
My dd was breastfed until she was 17mths old. She has slept in our bed since birth. I know it was a mistake but she is my one and only child AND I was afraid of not being able to hear her in her own room. U see my BF's lil girl, who was 2mths older than my dd, died of sids. It was too much of a reality for me, since we'd hope they would grow up to be friends like we were. I know it scared my DH as well, so we both agreed for our lil girl to stay with us in our bed. It didn't bother us any. Now I did read in the book that change is a big thing for children. Well, last July my dh and I moved up here to the Illinois from Texas and we lived with my sis. Then in Feb. we moved into our own apartment. In May we had to make an ER trip back to Texas and then my mom, who was living with us for a few months, moved out of our apartment in June. Thinking back, these are BIG changes. Not just for us but our DD. probably bigger. The point, u ask? lol, is that she's now taking to falling asleep in my arms by rocking and then when we lay down she INSISTS on sleeping on top of me. She's never done this before. Not even as an infant. But now she just has to be on top of me. Whether it's clinging on like a monkey, or her laying her head on me. Her body laying horizontal to me. ANYTHING. Now, before this started last month she was doing good about falling asleep on her own. In our bed or hers. which we bought in June, her bed. She would nap in it during the day and sometimes fall asleep in it at night. She'd wake up some time during the night and yes, we did take her in our bed but now it's constant. I don't know if it was because her Grandma left or what but it's been a mystery. If it helps any, her room is now what use to be her grandma's room. The problem now is that we aren't getting enough sleep. My Dh and I. My dd, isn't sleeping well either. She's tossing and turning as well. I'm not liking sleeping on my back every nite. And I'm at a lost. Someone please help.  ??? It has been eventful I will give u that but there has to be some thing we can do?? Thank you all for listening!!
Veronica

Offline ¤ Efka ¤

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Re: Hi I'm new here and I have a toddler who won't sleep on her own!!
« Reply #1 on: August 04, 2007, 03:38:03 am »
Does she fall asleep in her own bed?
What does she do when you just lie next to her?
Have you considered sleeping for couple nights in he room?

Ill move your post to toddler sleep
~Efka~


Offline Layla

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Re: Hi I'm new here and I have a toddler who won't sleep on her own!!
« Reply #2 on: August 04, 2007, 07:21:59 am »
Hi there & welcome :).

I just wanted to clarify... is co-sleeping something you don't want to do anymore? Are you trying to work towards her sleeping in her bed for naps & bedtime?

How did you get her sleeping in her bed a while ago? There are a few ways to teach her to sleep on her own. I would probably do the Gradual Withdrawal since she is so dependant on you at the moment & used to co-sleeping.

Here's the link: - https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=63896.0

You could either get a mattress & camp out in her room or use a chair & move yourself towards the door

Layla



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Offline jvcq1212

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Re: Hi I'm new here and I have a toddler who won't sleep on her own!!
« Reply #3 on: August 04, 2007, 14:21:56 pm »
I'm sorry. Okay, Yes I want to not co-sleep anymore. Neither my dh and I are getting "restful" sleep. and it's because she is a bed hogger. ha ha. My DH would put her to sleep in her own room. I would either go to our bedroom or be in the living room and he'd put her to sleep. Crying or no crying. that was at nite and during the day, she would sometimes drift off on her own, with some music, or a movie. Depending on how tired she was. Now she won't sleep in the room naptime or not. I tried sleeping in her room so she can sleep on her own bed, but she just comes down and falls asleep next to me because i refused to let her sleep on top of me. I did it once because i need to get a mattress in there. the floor was oh so uncomfy. ;D But that is where we are at. Daddy would put her to sleep but for now he's not feeling well. So, I can't ask him to do it. I can't distinguish between "separation anxiety" or just plain being "spoiled"? Another problem that may be contributing to this is her eating habits, they aren't the best right now. She's refusing to eat all the old things she use to like and now we are in transition of trying to find out what she'll eat now. How nice it would have been if they came with a manual huh? lol. P.s. I've been a SAHM since she was born so I know she's use to me being with her always.
« Last Edit: August 04, 2007, 14:23:54 pm by jvcq1212 »

Offline mari

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Re: Hi I'm new here and I have a toddler who won't sleep on her own!!
« Reply #4 on: August 04, 2007, 20:22:36 pm »
Firstly, with the eating, could it just be a phase?  Alex is a nightmare with food sometimes, but I jst keep putting the foods on her plate, along with foods that I know that she will like and she will eat them eventually.

Secondly, whether it is SA or just spoiled, the main thing is she isn't used to her own bed so she will probably need a little Gradual withdrawal.  Have a look at this link.

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=80750.0

I would go for the GW method for a while until she is used to her bed and then WIWO when she is more settled.  Keeping her in her bed will probably be difficult but keep laying her there and reassuring her that yo are near.  Stick with it, be consistent and you will get your bed to yourselves eventually.