seriously frustrated with GW

[holdenlouis]

He woke about 10:30 and I went in told him it was ok and he fell back to sleep without a fuss. Thn he slept till 7:30 this morning. I hope this happens again today.

[Peek-a-boo]

I hope so too.   

[holdenlouis]

Yesterday for nap I did wi/wo for an hr. and he slept for 1.5 hrs. But when he woke up he had a runny nose. I felt horrible. So last night I wo once then stayed in the room. I didn't have to keep my hand on him so maybe I should do the gw till this cold clears up. He woke at 1:30 and went back to sleep without a fuss then an early am wake at 5:30. DH just stayed up with him. Today he is coughing and a runny nose so I shouldn't  do the wi/wo while he is sick. But I will try not to do any ap like the hand on him to sleep. Does that sound ok. Or should I try wi/wo for a few times? So confused and feel bad for the poor little guy. He's never had a cold this bad before.

[Peek-a-boo]

Lisa--that seems like a reasonable plan--GW with no hand in the crib until he's healthy, then wi/wo.  Hope he feels better soon.   

[holdenlouis]

Well 2 nights ago I tried to stay in the room but he was throwing a tantrum in the crib so I told him I was going to go and he cried. I went back in 2 or 3 times and he fell asleep on his own. Last night I did the same thing because he wanted my hand on him. It took 3 times last night for him to fall asleep also. Then he woke at 2 and it took 1.5 hrs to go back to sleep. But he did on his own with not a lot of crying. He still has this cold and I know I'm not suppose to sleep train while sick but it seems to be better than him throwing a tantrum while I'm in there. Last night he stopped crying and played for a few minutes then started crying again. Do I start the count when he starts crying again? And how do you think we are doing?

[MDHmommy]

Hi Lisa,
Hang in there. So, you're staying with him for a while and then leaving to do Wi/Wo?
Is there a reason why you're not just picking one or the other? I know it's hard, but you might have more success if you picked one method rather than trying to combine the two.

If you stay and then leave he might feel confused...If you talk about what you're going to do i.e. Holden, first we;ll read this book, then mommy will sing you xxx fav song tuck you in and it's sleep time  and then actually follow through and do it, I think you'll have more speedy results, with a less frustrated LO!

As far as the cold goes - you are the best person to evaluate that - if he's acting fine and not fussy during the day, feeling ok, etc. you can probably go ahead and do it. But if he's really uncomfortable - wait a couple more days.

But whatever you do - make a decision and stick with it. That's the best thing you can do for LO, now and later too! 

[Peek-a-boo]

We alwasy kept sleep traininng through teething, colds, etc.     It it was something bigger (like a tummy bug with vomit) we would have taken a break, but I honestly found for my DS that it was too confusing to stop. 

[holdenlouis]

Well nap was a disaster I feel so ty! I yelled at him and made matters worse. I did the whole gearing up to w/o and he wouldn't stop crying and it just escalated to pure hysteria. I ended up sitting outside his door. I am not standing next to bed and staying in there a long time. I feel like I am going to lose control. This is sending me back into depression. I called my therapist today. I'm sorry to blurtall this out. I just am feeling so lost and hopeless right now. I feel like such a bad mom.  I read all the books and I am still lost

[debo620]

Oh Lisa, hang in there---it will get better. Give yourself a break, you really are doing great. You are not a bad mom. Although I do understand how frustrated you are. I am too these days. Yelled at Noah yesterday, boy does that feel terrible. Things will get better and its okay to have an off day. We are only human. Massive HUGS!

[MDHmommy]

Hugs Lisa - I've been there too....I hear you!

Maybe you should take a break from it for a while, just kinda step back and think about what you really need to accomplish and why. And keep in mind too - there's no *right* way to do any of this stuff, just the way that will work for your LO...obviously what you're doing now isn't working for either of you if you're both so upset   

[holdenlouis]

Thanks for the kind words. I was going to give it a break but I felt if I did we would 2 steps back. So the past 2 nights Holden has fallen to sleep on his own with only wi/wo for about 4-5 times. The naps are different. He screams and cries and it took  him an hr. to fall asleep. I actually had to go pee(sorry) and so I washed my hands and the water made him calm down so I left it running. When I shut it off he wimpered so I turned it back on and he fell asleep. But then he only slept for 45 min. I know he was probably over tired because he woke at 6 am and we went shopping and were late for nap time. Sorry had to stop writing dinner, bath, and bedtime are done Whew! Bed time went really well Only 1 time of wi/wo.  Why is nap time so much more difficult than bedtime? The only thing different between the2 are family aroundtosay nite-nite and a bottle. Everything else is the same.

[Peek-a-boo]

I'm so glad night is going well! 

Hmmmm . . . a few ideas; these are all things you're probably already doing, but just in case:

--Do you use any sort of white noise?  Like a fan facing the wall perhaps?  If he found the water soothing, perhaps white noise would help?

--Is his room thoroughly darkened?  I found this key for my DS.  Any light through the window and he's too stimulated to nap.

--Have you tried moving around the start time for his nap?  My little guy can handle more A time after his nap than before, so I found an earlier nap time more effective.  My little guy is younger than yours so may be quite different.

Keep at it.   

[holdenlouis]

Thanks for the ideas. He does have a ceiling fan he likes and I turned it on but not enough. I think I could make it darker in there. Today he woke at 6 am so I think 5hr 15min- 5.5 wake time is good especially since yesterdays nap was so short. He did sleep all night though. Got somerunning around to do today so I hope I make it back home for nap. thanks!

[holdenlouis]

Hi just checking in. Well we didn't make  it back yesterday for nap but he had a 30 nap in the car in the am and 40 in the pm on the way home. Bedtime was good and I did wi/wo only 1 time. Today I became a Godmomma to our sweet nephew Jack and we were out all day. I took Holden for a ride and he slept 45 min. Bedtime went very well even missing bath time and I did not have to wi/wo at all. Now we will have tackle the naps. Thanks everyone for your encouragement and your advice. Will keep you posted.

[Peek-a-boo]

Thanks for letting us know how it's going.