What am I doing wrong?

[sedwards5]

Hello!
I've been doing BW (for the most part) since my 1st dd was 2 months old but I always seem to stumble at this age....I have a 5 yr dd, 3 yr ds, and a 10 week dd.

Our trouble seems to be naps. She weighed 7lbs 6oz at birth and now weighs 14lbs 5oz.
Our typical day is this...
7:30ish wake/feed. Breast feeding
activity-usually just talking to her or having her sit in the bouncy seat checking things out.
Around 8:30 she will start to show signs that she needs a change of scenery/nap.

(**I don't have a consistent wind down time b/c I'm having trouble catching her before she gets excited)

Right now I will go in her dark room (with a noise machine on) and hold her (she's usually crying) I will hold her until she is calm, then lay her down.  We're doing a 1/2 swaddle.  Sometimes she will go to sleep then others I have to pick her up a few times. 
She will drift off and wake up at 45 minutes (like clockwork).  From what I have read, she is overstimulated/overtired.  Am I keeping her up too long?  This morning she yawned after 40 minutes, is that when I need to go to her room?

So when she wakes up after 45 minutes she's either wide awake or just mad.  I've tried to put her back down before but it seemed impossible (keep in mind I have 2 others running around like mad).

So we get up then I feed her at the 3 hour mark and the whole thing starts again.
This goes on all day until 7:00ish pm.  We bathe/put on pj's then I nurse her.  I burp her and usually lay her down awake.  She will sleep anywhere from 5-9hrs at this time.  Dream feeds don't work well with her, when we did dream feeds she would wake every 3 hours after that.

Any suggestions on my nap time wind down?  How do I extend her naps?  And I take my other 2 to preschool 2 days/wk, is it still possible to be on a routine when we have to run around a lot? 

[Jocasta]

Hugs honey - I'm by no means an expert and just tend to go with the flow with my los.  We've been hit occasionally with the 45 minute nap monster but (touch wood), we've been fairly lucky.  I have found that putting my DD down earlier in the mornings for her first nap used to really extend that first nap - someone on here once told me that it's a continuation of their bedtime sleep if you get them down early enough.  I think it's definitely worth a try.

Hopefully some far more experinced bw's will come along and offer something far more constructive.

Hugs honey and I'm sending tons of good nap vibes your way 

[*Nicola*]

I think you are right, it sounds like she is overstimulated/overtired by the time you are getting her down for her nap.

When you see her yawn this will be her cue to let you know that she is tired and is ready for her nap.   I would take her to her room then and begin the wind down routine.  I think your routine of going to her room, noise machine on and swaddling is fine  just make sure that you are consistent with it as she will become familiar with it then and know what to expect.

I think Jo's advice to get the first nap on time is great.  If they have a good night time sleep, a good feed and then another good nap then it sets them up well for the coming day.  Remember that as babies get overtired it becomes more difficult to settle them for naps and consequently they don't sleep as deeply/as long and the overtired cycle continues.

I will post you some links on using EASY when you have some other LO's to take to school etc.  There are some good tips etc there. 

HTH 

ETA: LINKS

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=98472.0 ... EASY with preschool run

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=101591.0 .... School age children and babies

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=65942.0 ... SLOW ... looking at baby's cues

[sedwards5]

Thanks for your help!  This morning, I tried to get her to bed after I saw the first yawn.  Okay, in my head it was right after but now I'm remembering, Grandma just had to snuggle her one more time, which probably turned into 10 minutes.  Tomorrow, I'm attacking it head on! 
Wish me luck!

[*Nicola*]

This morning, I tried to get her to bed after I saw the first yawn.  Okay, in my head it was right after but now I'm remembering, Grandma just had to snuggle her one more time, which probably turned into 10 minutes. 

    Oh, I remember that!! 

Loads of luck 

[petherbridge]

Hi there, I could have written your post!!! My lo is 5 weeks and can only stay awake sometimes enough time to literally feed her and nappy change!!! (honestly). Sometimes she has slept for a good 3 hours, wakes hungry and is yawning STRAIGHT after the feed!! Are you like me in that you feel as though it's cruel to put them straight back? I feel as though i'm shutting her away! However, i'm learning to just go with it. She just needs more sleep than some and if i don't put her down on cue she then ends up berserk and the whole day is off!! Just one thing i would ask/say, if anyone has any tips. She really does need to go down within half hour of intial waking. The thing is i have a 5yr old to take to school so mon to fri i have to put her in the pram and she usually wakes up the minute the pram stops!!! If i try to put her in cot she kicks off.
My advice is to put your lo down as soon as she's ready regardless of how long been awake.

Good luck, Sarah

[*Nicola*]

My DD has always needed TONNES of sleep.  Even now at 4.5 years old she still sleeps at least 12 hours at night and would nap 2 hours per day if I let her!

Until we started whispering at 8 weeks, she seemed to be constantly sleeping (on me or on breast) or was constantly crying because she was overtired 

BW really helped me to understand her, and read her cues, following her lead    I found the schedule and the sleeps a bit restrictive initially as she always seemed to be sleeping, and would only sleep well in her own cot but over time, as her Activity time stretched out it worked out perfectly  . 

It is difficult in the early stages ... BUT enjoy the time when you are feeding, cuddling etc and also enjoy the You time    It's a blessing 

[petherbridge]

Hi, I've just been reading some links that Nicola posted (big thanks). One suggested what seems a great idea for school runs in the morning.. (not sure about when i have to pick him up). The idea is to kind of do a dream feed around 6-6.30am. then put lo straight back in cot which will (hopefully) provide time to get the other/s ready for school and breakfast. Then transfer to pram at last minute for school run. Hopefully then, by the time back from school run it's time to feed again anyway. Sounds perfect in theory. i'm certainly going to try it in the morning. (keep everything crossed for me!). I really have found if she doesn't sleep well in the morning then my WHOLE day is horrendous. At least when we get home feed would be due and we are at home for next sleep.

Thanks again Nicola for the link. Sarah x

[*Nicola*]

Very welcome 

Keep us posted on how things go.  I am already dreading trying the schedule clashes with a 4.5 year old and a newborn, so it would be great to see how things go, what works/doesn't work etc and just share some ideas. 

I'm going to resurrect those threads, come and join me and post your successes