Am sick of seeing a "5" on the clock!

[Melsy]

Am really just wanting to vent.  DS is a VERY active 3 year old and being pregnant and tired and emotional isn't helping.    I just wish we could have a sleep-in every now and again.  Every morning when I hear him wake-up and I roll over and look at the clock and it says 5:...whatever, I just want to cry. 

Yesterday (saturday) DH and I tried to wear him out during the day in the hopes that maybe he isn't getting enough exercise during the week with me (cause frankly, I can't be bothered some days!)  and hope that maybe we could get a sunday morning lie-in.     Nope!  He went for a swim in our pool in the morning, went with DH for an hour long walk (he walks too, not in the pram) and when they got back, another swim.  We also threw the footy around while waiting for dinner to cook.  I don't think we could have fit in any more physical activity if we tried!  I also cooked spag bog (his favourite) as I knew he would eat this so he wouldn't be going to bed without dinner (which he occasionally does  picky eater, don't get me started!)  He also had some yoghurt for dessert and a milk drink before bed.  He was in bed at 6.45pm. 

Granted, we are lucky, we never have had night wakings.  Very fortunate there.  Even during big bed transition and switching to no naps, we never had NW.  So I guess I better count my blessings there.  And I put some matchbox cars in his bed for when he wakes and this keeps him amused for 15mins or so.  Then he starts "SHOUTING LOUDLY" for us to come and get him up.  I managed to not get up till 6.30am.  DH stayed in bed till I eventually went and got mad at him till 8.20am!!     Grrrrr.....

I am just so tired by the end of the day, plus I usually wake a few times at night either uncomfortable or need to pee or whatever and then to most days be woken by 5.45am......    I get so jealous when I read posts of people's routines on here and there kids wake at 7 or 7.30am or even 8am!!  I think, "why can't I have that too".    I am sure it is part of who Aidan is, I was a really early waker too when I was young, so maybe it's genetic, however I definately outgrew it and now I really, really, REALLY love my sleep!    Might have to wait till puberty till Aidan outgrows it like I did!     I just worry how I will ever cope once #2 is here and I have to be up to do a dreamfeed, then up in the middle of the night for feeds plus being up at the crack of dawn.     I worry I will have a mental breakdown.     Sorry for whinging, just tired and emotional today.

Melissa

[mum6791]

Hello There

I hate waking up before 6:00 too!  My dd is an early waker as well, although she is only 13 months.  Hopefully venting helped    Have you and dh ever tried to take turns on the weekend?  For eg you get to sleep in on Sat and he on Sun?  If you have this preset then there is no early morning arguments or resentment.  We have always done better if we know the plan before we go to bed then waiting for things to work themselves out in the morning.

Also, have you tried to shift ds schedule?  If you do it slowly, 10 - 15 min every few days maybe his wake up will shift too.  Of course then you have to entertain him later into the evening.

Good luck!

[Shdef]

A later bed time will work at that age, honest! Try and gradually move it forward to 7.30-8 pm and try and keep the light in his room off in the morning until 6.30, or 7 am. It WILL eventually work out. If bed time is 6.45 he SHOULD be waking at 5.45, 11 hours is typical at that age...

HUGS!

[ryan's mum]

I was thinking a later bedtime too . Ryan's bedtime at that age was 7.30 pm but he was napping , once he quit (i quit ) the nap , bedtime got shifted to 7pm and he mostly wakes at 7-7.30am now , that was untill the time change , we are slowly getting back to 7am wake now after the 5.30am wakes . I would work on finding a bedtime that works for you ,I know 15 mins can make a difference here on what time Ryan wakes

[taygensmom]

Yep, I was thinking the same thing. Your LO is getting 11 hours of sleep at night, just not at the times that work for you and your family!!! My LO also gets 11 hours, but it is from 8:00 PM to around 7:00 AM. If I started consistently putting him down at 6:45, I think he would start waking very early as well!! I would also work on shifting his whole schedule, not just his bedtime, so that he is sleeping in later. That means shifting all meals, naps, and bedtime (if you only shift bedtime it may not work as well). So you would need to "re-train" him on when his body needs to sleep, gets hungry, etc... Not sure if he naps during the day still or not? A possible schedule would be get up at 7:00 (we don't get our LO up until this time even if he wakes a little earlier. he has learned to play in his crib for a bit!!), breafast at 7:30, lunch at 12:00, afternoon nap at 1:30 or 2:00 (if he still takes one), supper at 6:00, bedtime at 8:00. HTH

[Melsy]

Hi guys,

Thanks for your responses to my vent!!!   

We were doing the early bedtime because we only in the past 3 or 4 months dropped the nap.  So I was advised on here that the early wakings were due to his body being over tired so therefor needing the early bedtime to compensate for the lost nap.    I just don't seem to be able to find a happy medium in between. 

He goes to daycare twice per week and naps there.    Just never at home.  No matter how much sleep he has had at daycare, he will only sleep 10 hours max.  So if he slept for 1/2 hour at day care - 10 hours at night.  2 hour sleep at daycare, still 10 hours at night.  And it is a later bedtime too, usually 8 or 8.30pm - so a 5.30am start to the day.    

On non daycare days when he doesn't want to nap, he is definately tired by 7pm.  Hence the usual 6.45pm bedtime so he has time to drift off by 7pmish.  I guess that makes sense that he is tired by then, as he has been awake since 5.45am/6am!!      I guess I will try and shift him ever so slightly every week until we get a 7.30pm bedtime and (fingers crossed!) a 6.30am wake-up!

I forget who asked (sorry, tired mummy brain!!) but yes, DH and I take turns.  He usually does the weekdays cause he has to be up to go to work and I do the weekends.  It isn't so much the having to get up out of bed part - it's just once I am awake - that's it!  There is NO going back to sleep.     So even if I wanted to roll over and go back to sleep while DH is getting up to him, it isn't possible.  I am a really light sleeper and I need SILENCE to be asleep.    I wish I was able to sleep through anything but alas, nope!  I hate when a storm comes thru at night time - I will be awake for HOURS!!!!   

Thanks again for letting me vent guys!   

Melissa

[lilmonkey]

Oh, sending you lots of sleep vibes!  I can totally understand where you are coming from as dd is pretty much the same.  She basically needs only 11 hrs of sleep and we have our fair share of early wakings.  Sometimes we do find that if one of us just go in and lie down with her, she will sleep an extra 30 min but only after 30 min of rolling about.     Now with the time change, the wake up is even earlier and this is not good at the moment as DH is away on a business trip and I have to be the one to go in and lie with her.  Needless to say that this is not helping me with the total amount of interupted sleep I should be getting as ds still requires 1 feeding in the night.  Hope you get it fix soon.

[Two mummies]

Hugs to you as I totally understand your problem.

Our lo was a habitual 5am waker as well and to be frank the only thing that saved us was daylight savings when 5am became 6am! I have wracked my brain to think of ways to extend her morning sleep, admittedly we weren't consistent in shifting her bedtime as we were just hanging out for daylight savings as the quick fix! We do however think that her early morning awakenings were happening in response to increased daylight in her room first thing in the morning. Maybe some black out blinds will help?

We also find no difference in total night time sleep whether she naps for 45 minutes or 2 hours at daycare!

I guess in 5 months we will have to figure something out when daylight savings ends so I'll keep reading these threads, offering empathy and support and hope that I get some good tips from other parents who's lo's wake to greet the day early.

Hugs again,

Soph

[Melsy]

Thanks Mimi and Soph!   

Soph - we have block out curtains AND blinds on both windows. I went in to his room at 8am to get clothes out for daycare and had to turn the light on it was so dark!!    

Also, in Brisbane, we don't do daylight savings, so no time change for us! 

I guess I will just work on the rule that he only needs 11 hours sleep and try and aim for 7.30pm to 6.30am.     Hopefully we can shift his little internal clock!! 

Hugs to all,

Melissa

[Two mummies]

Maybe we need to start a thread called..."tips to keep early awakers quietly playing in their room until at least 6.00am"

I did remember reading one reply on a thread that suggested using a digital clock in the lo's room and teaching them that when the number says' '6' they can get Mummy up.

Soph

[lilmonkey]

Sophie,  dh tried to teach her that she can only wake him (as he's usually the one the goes to her in the morning) when the little hand points to 6 (he wears a wathc that glows in the dark).  Well, she kept on grabbing for his hand to check for the little hand.  So dh tried the digital clock but dd still insist on checking the little hand.   

[Two mummies]

That's hilarious! Our lo's are so one-track-minded sometimes it's scary and it means we have to watch what we say all the time in case we dig deeper holes for ourselves!!!!

One 'timer control' thing that worked for my brother and I when we were little was the lights on the Christmas tree. My parents set them on a timer so that the lights would only come on once the clocked ticked over to 6.30am. We were warned that any attempt to open presents or wake mum and dad would result in the presents instantly being returned to Santa to be delivered NEXT Christmas. Suffice to say on Christmas mornings there were two very compliant little children sitting next to the Christmas tree just waiting for the clock to hit 6.30am!

Maybe something like that would help lo's to stay in their rooms...kinda double reinforcement...wait until it hits 6.00am and the lights magically come on....

Soph

[Layla]

Mellisa I don't really have any tips on how to keep them quiet once they are up but as a mum of early rises I can totally sympathise. My girls wake around 6am... sometimes as early as 5.30 (next door neighbour goes to work b/n 5.30-6am so he wakes Isabella up when he starts his car & depending on how quickly I get to her she will wake her sister up as well). What I have done though to stop myself from getting totally ed that they are up THAT early is change the clock in the kitchen (which is the only clock I look at) & bring it forward to 7am. That way I pretend that they wake up at 7am instead of 6 . It seems silly to do that but for the longest time I wanted to have them wake at 7am & was quiet jealous too of those that wake at 7/7.30/8 or even 8.30. But with us its quiet pointless to try & change their schedules as hubby gets up b/n 6-6.30 & the neighbour with his car....

I do go to bed though around 9/9.30pm so that way I am totally prepared for the 5.30am onward wake up call

(((HUGS)))

[Katet]

A later bed time will work at that age, honest! Try and gradually move it forward to 7.30-8 pm and try and keep the light in his room off in the morning until 6.30, or 7 am. It WILL eventually work out. If bed time is 6.45 he SHOULD be waking at 5.45, 11 hours is typical at that age...

HUGS!

OH NO IT doesn't if their name is Aiden... trust me to bed 8pm wake 6am, bed 7pm, wake 7am.

Mel... trust me I know where you are coming from, but with L I get the NW (4 last night) with L as well... can't wait for the last tooth to come through, but it's been 5 weeks & still 1/2 through. Plus now a cold... I got 3 days after the change to Daylight savings (but you don't get that in QLD) then back to 5amish & it is then 8 hours before he wants to Nap & then no keeping him up... he only has to sit down & falls asleep. I so understand