ARGHH!!! So last night was not much better. From 12 to 4, Iris wasn't exactly up continuously, but she was calling out and crying and either DH or I was with her probably a total of 7 times in that period of time. I even in desperation tried taking her into our bed (I actually am not against cosleeping if it works-- Lilah sometimes comes to our bed if she's sick or having trouble sleeping and it's fine), but she just started trying to play with us (which actually her sister would do to at that age). At that point it was 3:30 in the morning, and I had not slept AT ALL that night (because lo and behold, exhausted as I was, I COULD NOT settle to sleep last night and pretty much just ended up waiting in the dark for Iris to wake up, or spent the time crying because I felt so desperate for sleep yet unable to get it
). When she persisted with trying to play with us, I put her straight back to bed. She cried a minute, then stopped, then fussed, then stopped, then cried another minute-- never really escalating, never going into an all-out cry, so I let her at it. Eventually it settled to her mantra cry and then we both finally fell asleep around 4 in the morning.
Anyway, my wondeful DH has decided that tonight I am to find somewhere else to sleep so I don't hear her crying and stop feeling like I'm on call all night because I simply can't continue to not sleep night after night, and really, I don't think Iris needs to nurse at night anymore. She only nursed once, briefly, at 12 last night and didn't seem particularly starving this morning, so I think I need to just buckle down and night wean now that DH is willing and able to take over.
Sleep training with Iris is very frustrating. What I did last night was essentially what I had to do for naps and bedtime; essentially, letting her fuss, sometimes very loudly, and more than really feels comfortable to me. But because she's so distractible, it seems me being in the room, rubbing her back or doing PU/PD actually just keeps her awake even longer. So I think we'll probably have to do the same for NWings now, too-- sort of WI/PD/pat/WO with a little more restraint about going back in than I really want. Pretty much, if she's not in an all-out cry, if I go in it seems to just make things worse.
So wish us luck tonight. I really hope this helps us get some sleep around here, because I'm about at the end of my rope.