Total sleep time for a 2 yo

[Missy Lou]

my LO is 23 months.  She just started day care monday (it's friday).  they say she naps although i have never asked how long.  i dont' know why. 

before this week, she slept 12.5 hours at night and a 2 hour nap.  i know that is on the high side.  this week she has been gradually waking up earlier and earlier.  Now she sleeps about 12 hours at night.

she's up from 6-noon.  naptime until 2.  up until 6 p.m.  should i push back bedtime?  i'm scared to try because she still has meltdowns at bedtime if OT. 

i know that it could be time to revise her routine, but i'm not sure. 

any suggestions?
TIA

[andibig]

Ok stupid question time but i assume you'd like a later wake up .

You could try adding just 15 mins and give it 3-4 days to see if it makes any difference.

Or possibly ask daycare how long she is napping.It could be the fatc she has just started daycare that has thrown her sleep off a little.

[Missy Lou]

Ok - so here's the summary of the past week and a half at day care. 

she used to sleep 12 or 12.5 hours at night.  starting the second night after beginning daycare, LO started to wake up 15 minutes earlier.  until friday morning, she woke at 5:45 - about 11.5 hours after bed.  saturday morning was 6.  saturday she had a 2 hour nap and woke at 6:30 sunday morning.  same nap time sunday and same wake time monday.

starting this week, she's been getting up at 6:15 earlier than this past weekend.  Plus she acts so OT when I pick her up. 

she has been sleeping really badly at night also.  whines and moans a lot.  but usually settles herself.  it's not often (even before day care) that DH or I need to settled her.  maybe a night or two a month where we go in and shush and lay her back down.  that's it unless she's sick then she needs a quick cuddle.

last night, she woke at midnight.  she kept tossing and turning and whining and then crying.  DH cuddled for a minute and put her in the crib.  she started crying within seconds.  this happened for about 45 minutes.  i finally laid on the floor in her room.  she would be quiet for about 15 minutes and then start crying again.  i really think she was sleepy but was too OT to sleep.  her trying to sleep last until after 3 a.m.  we brought her to bed with us where she slept until 6:15.

day care says she sleeps but now they're saying well she mostly "rests" but does sleep a little.  her teacher wasn't there this morning at drop off for me to know what "a little" means. 

i am so regretting day care.  her sleep is awful and she's getting bullied by the bigger kids (teacher is watching out for her though), doesn't play with the other kids and has started crying tears when i leave.

i need suggestions from moms who have put LOs in day care.  should i take her out and put her back with MIL even though MIL wasn't the best situation either? 
TIA

[Colin Macs Mom]

M, what was the deal with MIL?

It does take a while for a LO to adjust to daycare, most say a month. But you know Addison best, do you think she just needs more time? Or deep down do you feel like it's not the place for her?

[Missy Lou]

MIL is manic depressive and won't take any medication and has thyroid cancer.  so when she has a doc appt, we have no one to watch addie.  plus my nephew who is 3 doesn't talk but does hit, spit, kick, scream, etc.  i didn't want addie around him.  because of nephew's behavior addie can't go outside at all during the day during the week or color or play with blocks or cars because nephew runs away when outside and throws toys at addie and niece and eats/breaks the crayons.
I don't know, jess.  i'm not sure which is best for her.  we've paid for january so i guess i'll see what's going on in another few weeks.  i'm just not sure whether the day care will really tell me how she's doing because they want her to be doing fine so she'll stay.  and since addie doesn't talk really, she can't tell me anything.

[Colin Macs Mom]

Oh my    I wouldn't want her with MIL either. Personally, I would give it a little bit more time and see if it improves. When Colin first started daycare he was 13.5 months and just shattered when I got there to pick him up. He would go to bed shortly after we got home. But he did adjust quickly - it didn't help that he was smack in the middle of the 2 - 1 nap transition so I'm not sure how much of it had to do with that rather than the daycare.

[andibig]

Aww  bless little Addie .

I have a strong feeling that her sleep at the moment is related to daycare and her feeling very unsettled.
I'd be tempted to give daycare more time and hopefully once she is more settled will feel more confident at daycare and join in with the other kids.
Are you able to puch bedtime earlier to compensate for her sleep at daycare??

[Missy Lou]

it's hard to make her regular bedtime.  bedtime has been 6 or 6:15.  we don't get home until 5:15.  i really can't get home earlier because i'm already leaving work a lot earlier than i should.  in that hour we need to eat and take a bath.  eating isn't going well because she is so blazing tired.  we've been doing bath only every other night. 

[Colin Macs Mom]

So then what time does she wake in the morning?

[Missy Lou]

used to be (pre day care) 6:30 or 6:45.  for the past week somewhere around 6:15. 

[Colin Macs Mom]

So she's sleeping 12 hours at night then? 

[Missy Lou]

more or less.  before day care, she slept 12 hours at night with a 2 hour  nap.  that's actually what started this thread.  i didn't know whether part of this sleep problem is that she's needing less sleep.  i wouldn't mind a later bedtime.  i've been putting her down early because she seems so OT.  my biggest worry is that she's going all day with such little naptime sleep. 

[Colin Macs Mom]

Yeah, I would assume she's OT too, but I'd expect her to be waking even earlier then.     

[Missy Lou]

i'm so confused, jess.  i pushed bedtime back to 6:30.  day care said she napped from 12:20 until 1:50.  So that was about 4.5 hours after nap.  she was fine until i put her in the crib.  then she did that awful cry where she doesn't make noise and tears are running down.  she screamed and cried for almost 15 minutes. 

she wasn't fussing at me to get her.  so i can't tell if she's OT or not tired enough. 

[Colin Macs Mom]

Is she a shy LO? Maybe the daycare thing is really challenging her and she's just unsettled.