how long should i wait to get back on track?

[lin7604]

We just had a 2 week vacation in meixo and ds did exceptionally well.  He napped and slept great in his play pen every day ( i was very worried about it) but we got home on wed am and he freaks evertime we put him down for a nap or bedtime now?  I do know he is sick ( diaherra) and did get 2 new molars on vacation adn i think his last one is trying to come through too, so all of this could be affecting him.  So how long do you think i should wait till i nip it in the butt???  He screams hysterically when he is put down right now and i have to rub his forehead to get him to sleep, but even last night he woke up many times i just brought him to bed with me and he still woke up crying many times, i def don't want him to think of getting in the habit of coming to bed with me or me rubbing his forehead.  BUt i just don't want it to become a habit to have to break after he is feeling better.  what do you think?

[Layla]

Well I would probably see a doctor to get some meds to help out with the illness. I think its ok to sleep train when they are teething as long as you give them some meds to cover the pain side of things but it s alittle different when they are sick.

So I guess I would wait until the illness is over & done with. Still I don't think you need to bring him into your bed... any way you could try to comfort him in his cot?

Does he have a stomach bug?

[lilmonkey]

Definitely agree about not bringing him into your bed.  It is a habit you don't want to start.  I'd stay with him in his room if you cannot leave until he is asleep.  It is much easier to break this habit with wi/wo or gw once everything is back to normal.

[lin7604]

yes it is a tummy bug, he has had diaherra for a few days now.  again last night i gave him tylenol before bed and orajel and 3 hrs later he was frantic.  he would't sooth at all.  i would waklk in and rub his forhead and he would calm down but everytime i would try to leave he would freak.  after 2 hrs of this i gave in and brought him to bed with me so i could get some sleep, as it was 2am. he woke up only once breafly at 6am and then slept till 8 am with is late for him.  ahh i just don't know what to do cause my hubby also agrees that we can't let it be habit but what else can you do when hes hysterical for so long??

[Layla]

Perhaps stay with him until he is asleep rather than walking out (again rather than taking him into your bed) & then you can work on moving towards the door (so do the gradual withdrawal). Maybe get a mattress in his room so you can get some sleep as well so when he wakes at night you can comfort him & shh him

[lin7604]

but he won't stay calm unless i'm touching him, i have to rub his head or hold him.    Today for nap i even thought i would let im cry a bit so he knows that we are home now adn this has to stop.  After 10 mins of hysteria i came in rubbed him for a few min and then when he was real caplm i left.  As soon as i turned my back he freaked!  So i let it go 15 min this time and then went in and rubbed him, he fell asleep quickly but then again i was rubbing his head.  a habit he will get used to very quickly.
who would of known that iw ould be going through this at home after mexico, i was positive this was what i was going to experience IN mexico!!!  You would think being in his own bed would be comforting?

[andibig]

Aww bless him.Hope he feels better soon.

I remember when Sasha had a really awful tummy bug and I ended up sleeping in her room and a couple of occassions I put her in bed with me.The way I see it when she is  ill I donn't mind doing some AP (accidental parenting) if she needs it.The bug really unsettled her as she was getting stomach cramps and pooping twice in the night .
when she was better I then did some sleep training to get her back on track.
HTH

[Petra-Kate]

I agree about not taking him to bed with you - that is a much harder habit to break than rubbing his forehead.  If he is sick with a tummy bug he probably is very uncomfortable lying down.  I know I often feel worse laying down when I have a stomach bug and end up sleeping propped up. 

Has the tummy bug cleared up?  If not and he has diarrhea still, I would very much consider taking him to the doctor.  Dehydration becomes a big concern in a little one with diarrhea.  Even if you are pushing fluids at home, after several days it can get to the point that you need more than water or juice can provide because of electrolyte depletion. 

In the meantime and until he is better, I would consider comforting him in his cot until he feels better.  I like the idea of putting a mattress in his room so you can sleep too.

I hope he feels better soon.

[lin7604]

well so far no diaherra today and he ate krispies for breakfast and consumme soup with rice at lunch so i do see he is feeling better.  Nap was a challange too and i'm dreading the next nap with in the hour.

[Petra-Kate]

I am glad he is starting to feel better.

Once he is all the way better you can do sleep training with wi/wo or gw.  I preferred gw because it was easier on my emotionally. But that is just me. 

[lin7604]

thanks, well he didn't have his 2nd nap as it was going to be too late so we did a earlier bedtime and i was terrible as well!  As soon as i turned around he got hysterical, so i let it go for 15 min.  Went in and lied him back down and just stood there, no touching.  He was fine with it and fought his sleep as he would keep checking to see if i was still there as he was falling asleep.  it took6 min before i could walk out, not bad but i don't get why he is freaking like this for sleep???

[lilmonkey]

Don't worry.  It will get better as he recovers.  DD is agreat sleeper but everytime she is sick or going through a milestone or suffering from SA, she still requires one of us to help her go to sleep.  I think that is is fine to remain with your lo to offer reassurance while he is going through this.  Once he is better, you can to wi/wo or gw.  Just think remember that when babies are in this state they are not themselves and offering to be there for them doesn't mean that all your hard work before has gone to waste.  Even now at over 3 yo, we have an extra pillow and blanket in dd's room just in case she needs one of us to stay with her. 

[lin7604]

thanks everyone!  Last night was terrible!  He had no diaherra at all yesterday and nothing so far today and it's almost lunch time so i think it's over now.  Last night we did the early bedtime as i had mentioned he again woke at midnight ( same time everynight in the past 3 days?)  We did the rub thing, didn't work, i just stood there, once he was asleep or i though he was i would go to leave and he would wake and freak.  We let him cry for 15 min and then go in, we would be in there from 15-30 min and nothing.  SO finally after 2 HRS of doing this we were both very tired and frustrated with him adn decided to let him CIO.  I have never done this before, but i have never been so frustrated with him like that before either.  I couldn't deal with it anymore   SO he cried for 45-60 min the last 15 were on and off and then he finally fell asleep.  I think he really wanted to come to bed with us but we agree with all of you that it a really bad habit to get into so we didn't do it.  He then slept from 3ish till 7:15 woke up crying again also which he never used to do.  SO for nap we decided to do CIO againa dn see what happens, well with in 20 min he was asleep so maybe we just have to be firm on him and it will sink back in quickly??? i just don't know, i hate to hear him cry like that.

[Layla]

Well I don't think CIO is the way to go... he was sick, he is teething, you traveled & it takes time for them to get back into their routine. Also inconsistency plays a big role here & if you rib his forehead/head & then take him into bed & then try something else, etc... he doesn't really know what's going on!

Personally I would stop the CIO & do wi/wo method for naps & nightwakings. He will cry but at least he is not left alone to deal with it!

You hate to hear him cry so please stop letting him cry himself to sleep & work with him to re-teach him how to self-sooth!

Layla

[lin7604]

easy to say though .  we tried that last night, rubbing his forhead for over 2 hrs, we even tried to rock, which usually works but once you tried to get up out of the chair he would freak all over again.  i just hear so many saw talk him to be if that feels secure for him and hepls him sleep, then others say no bed at all.  i'm confused what to do?