how do you define sleeping through the night?

[rinajack]

I read the first page and the last page, but wanted to add just one possible solution.

My DD always woke hungry if milk was her last food before bed - around that age, we switched to milk earlier, then dinner right before bed, and I mean the very last thing before wind down.  I made sure it was veggies AND protien.

It helped.

[Mama2boys]

Hi Lis,

That a bit heartening in some sad way that other mom also have it bad. I am trying to be really strict but its disaster after disaster,,now DS is down with a cold yet again! But I will continue to strive. btw what do you do when he asks for milk/wake sup in the middle of the night. Luckily we don't do the bring into bed routine, so one less thing to worry about....but I surely need to be more consistent.

Hi Rina, thats a good advise, but not sure if I am doing it very different. DS has dinner at 5:30 and milk at 7 and dinner is always carbs and protein and fruit as well. his milk intake is never more than 4oz...but maybe I will try reversing that, but just concerned that he will rely more on milk than solids then...

why don;t they come with a manual???

[mari]

If he wakes for milk in the middle of the night, I wouldn't give any.  That's how it all started with Alex and it was, at it's highest, 4 bottles a night!!! I would use whatever sleep training your little one is used to until they go back to sleep.

[Lissybits]

Same here. When DS has asked for milk in the night I just say "No darling, it's not time for milk now." and then dealt with the tears - of which there were many in the start !!
In the beginning, I offered water - which he drank, but slowly, I've done away with that too. In my opinion, he doesn't NEED to drink water in the night - not in winter anyway. Even the water became a small prop in our house!!
Now, on the rare occassion he asks for water on waking I normally try to put him back to sleep without giving it and only if he wakes again and asks for water would I give it .

I found out the l o n g  hard way that the ONLY way for my DS to sleep through the night is if I was strong and NEVER gave in. As I said before, we are now down to 1 NW per night and I am waiting with bated breath for that to disappear altogether - which I think (hope) will be soon.
I only wish I'd done it sooner - it would have been easier.
I would urge you to try too - it is soo hard in the beginning - I don't know how I got by on so little sleep - but the rewards are so worth it.
You CAN do it and we will support you all the way!!

Good Luck,
Lis
 

[rinajack]

I think the diff for us with solids very last instead of milk is they sit in the tummy longer making baby (toddler) feel fuller

[mari]

I did (and still do) put a sippy cup in bed with Alex.  A good one which doesn't leek when you turn it upside down.  I told here where it was and if she woke and ask for a drink I would say 'you know where your cup is, have a drink then it's time ot go back to sleep'  and she did..........eventually!

[Lissybits]

Mari, do you think you could dig up a link to your old threads for us to read? I think it would be a fab story of encouragement
Lis
x

How's it going Mukta?

[mari]

I'll have a look Lis, but it might be a bit traumatic for me to relive those dark days! 

I'm also not so good at posting links, the copy and paste doesn't work for me?     If I find it, I will point you in the right direction.

[mari]

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=69535.45

ok there it is, if you can't find it from my dodgy link posting then you will find it in Sleeping for Toddler and the last post was on 29th September 2006.

[mari]

See, I don't know where that went! 

It's on page 69 of the Sleeping for Toddlers board and it's about half way down the page called 'Getting Desperate Now'

[Mama2boys]

another hard night ladies. DS now has a full on cold yet again so everything is taking a backseat.
I just feel horrible because i know its my fault and i have got him into this bad habit which means neither he nor we sleep well. How stupid was and am I....I still cant get myself to do the cold turkey and give him water will have to continue the dilution route! That my other problem I seem to be so desperate I am trying everything and nothing and i fear I have made a mess of everything..

Anyways present plan is this, please correct me if its wrong as I am planning to stick to it, have for the last 2 days.

If ds wakes up i try and use pacifier and get him back into bed, if that does not work I offer water...the wakings happen every hr/2hrs. Finally at 4ish I give milk/water mixture i.e. diluted milk...and back to bed, then when he wakes up anytime after 6 i give a full feed.

Now my problems: I know giving him the diluted milk at 4 am is not the best thing and I am probably just reinforcing the problem in some way. But the dilution trick worked to get him rid of the 2am feed. Do you think this will work or no? I just cant get myself to not give the 4am feed the crying drives me crazy and just adds to my stress and his.
Second q - He does not go back to sleep after the 6 am feed, or sleeps only for a short time, so is not getting his 12 hrs night sleep. Hopefully this is not too bad
a desperate me

[Mama2boys]

Mari, Thanks for posting the link, reading your chain made me cry... it was so beautiful to see things get better and your success. Gave me some positive energy. I can tell you I need it rigt now, for more than 1 reason!

[KellyC]

{hugs} Mukta.

I think the dilluted milk at 4am is fine so long as you're sticking to a plan of reducing the ratio of formula:water every couple of nights.  It's not an overnight solution but something which should see results over the next week or so.  I'm afraid he's still going to need you every time he wakes because you're putting the dummy in for him.  Did you try putting lots in his cot (with a night light I suppose) so he can find them himself?  Like Mari I also used to leave a drink of water in Zander's cot for him to help himself to.  I think he needs to learn how to get himself back to sleep without your help - give him access to the things he might need to do this but he's going to have to figure out how to do it himself.  Did you read the walk in / walk out thread?

Kelly x

[Mama2boys]

Hi Kelly,

Thanks for the hug and for repsonding I was hoping someone would repsond and fill me with confidence that my plan is ok. I honesty don't mind waking up to give him the pacifier once or twice but the feed is what was killing me.

yes I have left dummies on his bed and he does put himself back to sleep at times, especially during the daytime naps. Will also start levaing the sippy cup with water for him so if he needs it he knows where to go.
I have read the WIWO and it has worked in the past, DS has always had major sleep issues and touch wood now he falls asleep on his own only with a slight back/bely rub. So I know WI/WO mixed with a bit of PD does work.

Anyways, thanks a ton for writing in tonight.Goodnight and hope tonight is a better night!

Mukta

[mari]

Thanks for helping with the link Jess! 

Wow, didn't I sound in a bad way during September?  I remember how bad it was though, I thought I would kill her some nights    She was a tough little cookie to crack, but I am sure that the thread can be an inspiration I really was desperate, but also I had only read Tracy's books briefly, sort of flicked.  Now I have read through them properly the methods come far easier.

Mikta, you can do it, keep it up you are doing so well and you can get a goodnight sleep if you stick with it and stay consistent.  That's the most important thing.  Goodluck for tonight.