What if they don't eat what you serve?

[rob1lu2]

My 11 month old (I can officially say that today) has previously been a fantastic eater, but not the last few days. She is turning her nose at things she used to previously love. I'm not sure what to do. Do I "force" her to eat. Do I offer her a tried and true - even though she may only want to eat that for three or four meals (or days ) in a row? Do I serve her what we are having and if she doesn't want it, don't make her eat it, but don't offer her something else?

What do you do?

Lu

[mari]

If you force them to eat, chances are that they won't.

Offer things that they like along witht things that they are not sure about so that they will definitely eat something.  If they refuse something, don't give it for a while and try to intorduce it again a little later.  try not to make too much of a deal about it, easier said than done I know, but they do go through phases and sometimes they eat like a horse, other times like sparrows.  They change due to growth spurts and I think that the weather has an affect on mine too.

[Samuel's mum]

I didn't/ don't force - ever. Have on occasion encouraged and bribed. But I do respect that at the end of the day it is down to him.
Someone once told me (was it here?) that you provide the food but only they can do the eating. A version of 'you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink'! I think it is important to respect that. My earliest memories are being forced to have '3 more mouthfuls', let alone the people forced to clean their plate (teaching people to override their full instincts sets off warning bells for me -not saying you'd do that).
Usually I have at least 2 or 3 things on the plate. If one is 'risky' or new then I try and make the other ones 'safer'. If everything is refused it goes away and we have a bath (rare now - the complete refusal, not the bath!!). I don't make a big fuss. Some of it might get offered again after a bath or he can have a piece of fruit.
I wouldn't provide an alternative meal.

[daybyday]

Looking at your DD's age....I picked offer something else, as in "include something" else...I would still keep offering what she's turning her nose up to, but try a variety.....

(Now if she was my DS's age, it would be a tough, that's your choice, eat it kind of thing    He's notorius for taking two bites and wanting to go play and come back for more later. That is not my kind of family dinner, so he has to make a sincere effort at his meal...my dd on the other hand, if she shakes her head no, I immediately remove the plate. She's done! although that's very rare!  )

[jess, lukeys_mom]

Hi 
It is REALLY normal for her to start rejecting foods that she previously liked around this age.

I think what you do, first and foremost, is try not to worry about it too much - at least on the outside - so that the mealtime is not stressful. For you or her  Whatever you do I would not force her to eat anything. Even if a meal goes by where she has hardly put anything into her mouth - she will not starve herself!

Are there any particular foods that she will eat without a problem? If I were you I would offer at least one of these foods at every meal. If there is only one food she will eat, then repeat that one if you have to. And then in addition to the current favorites, introduce a new food or one that you think she might eat in addition to that. Be non-chalant about it and if she doesn't eat it, just put it aside. I wouldn't keep trying over and over again, just a couple of times and if she won't eat it then say "OK" and put the bowl aside. Hold off on giving that particular food again for a bit and try other ones.

What method of feeding have you been doing? Purees? Does she get finger foods her meals? Whatever you are doing you may want to try mixing it up a little bit, giving her a chance to do something new. For example, maybe mash up a banana or avocado and put a little on a spoon, and then lay the spoon on her tray and see if she is interested in taking it.

Hopefully it will just be a few days or a week and she will start eating "normally" again! HTH x

[jess, lukeys_mom]

oops posted at the same time as these! 

[irish3680]

I do the exact same thing as Samuel's Mom. Ella has been eating the same meals as DH and I since about 10 months. Usually for breakfast and lunch I will offer some type of choice so she has some control over the meal. Dinner is non-negotiable and everyone eats what I cook, no alternatives. However, if she isn't hungry or doesn't want to eat that's her choice and I don't push or force her and don't make a big deal about it. Luckily she really isn't a picky eater and has a good appetite. But on the rare night that she refuses dinner, I wrap it up put it in the fridge and offer it just before bed if she is hungry. She does like to dip certain foods in fat free dressing, ketchup, or other sauce so if she asks for that I will allow that to be added to the meal. She will go in cycles of loving certain foods and then not wanting to eat them and I  think that's normal. I just keep offering them and eventually she goes back to eating them. They always keep things interesting, don't they? 

[rob1lu2]

Yes, they love it!

We've been doing BLW since they were about 7 months old. Sylvie (the one who's refusing) is/was a champ eater. It would take her a long time to finish, but finish she would. Ever single bite on her tray and more if you kept offering. We used to call her The Tapeworm.

But just in the last few days, she turns away from almost eveything except her dearest loves - toast, bread, crackers, pasta, blueberries, cheese. I want to offer a variety and I want her to eat some veggies - which is what I mean by forcing them. I guess I mean more like, offering it on the spoon - which she will then take and feed herself with. And while she waves one spoon around, maybe put a dab on her lips to remind her that she likes ... fill in the blank. I do keep giving her what she likes - I want her to eat anything at the end of the day!

She's also been having some EWings, I think more due to too much daytime sleep and a desire to go from 2-1 nap. But b/c she hasn't been eating as much as usual, my DH is adamant that she's starving, and so wants to give her a bottle. So we tend to have a little fight about it at 5:15 in the morning - which I hate. I don't want to feed her - don't think she needs it. Of course she will drink the bottle if offered, but that's a different story.

Anyway...

Hope other people vote!
Lu

[SiestaNoMore]

I voted "You Get What You Get" as my DS is 2 years old.
He usually gets a variety of a couple things for each meal. But if he barely eats, I just try to ensure his next snack is a bit more substantial rather than whipping up another meal right than that he'd like better.

[Sarah - Enfys' Mum]

I put you get what you get, but in reality I always give Enfys 2 or 3 things in each meal and she usually eats 1 or 2 of them.  Like today at lunch she had rice crackers with hummus, lentil soup, and an apple.  She wolfed down the rice cakes and chewed on the apple for a long time but wouldn't take any soup off the spoon.  Another day she might like to have something on a spoon.  But this morning she didn't want any breakfast so she had nothing. 

[lilmonkey]

At this age, I would offer something else but only for breakfast and lunch.  Dinner is a different story as dd gets her congee (similar to porridge) with meat and she tends to finish that off quite well.  There were times when she just refused to eat so I let her drink chicken soup in a cup as a snack.