I really need some help here ... seriously considering giving up BFing

[lisi's mum]

Nicola...
is this your first cycle since Callie was born? AF is notorious for throwing a spanner in the works both taste and supply wise, particularly the first time she shows up again. Could this be the answer?

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

Good luck with that

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

Nicola...
is this your first cycle since Callie was born? AF is notorious for throwing a spanner in the works both taste and supply wise, particularly the first time she shows up again. Could this be the answer?

AF?

[*Nicola*]

Nicola...
is this your first cycle since Callie was born? AF is notorious for throwing a spanner in the works both taste and supply wise, particularly the first time she shows up again. Could this be the answer?

AF?

AF = aunt flo = periods  I'm a former diehard TTCer 

Katie, nope 2nd time    First time was at 12 weeks when we had the 'original' crying at the breast/refusing feeds stuff.  Also 3  month growth spurt time and it all seemed to go to pot.   Then everything was fine until about 16 weeks, when it was 4 month growth spurt time and we had more crying.  No AF then thou. Then I got directed to the reflux forum, there they suspected reflux, got gaviscon from doc which seemed to do the trick.  Now we have AF again and return of crying/refusing feeds. 

*ETA* Just been doing bedtime feed and thinking about this.  At 16 weeks I was positive the crying was related to AF as I thought she was going to pay a visit, had the pains, the AF-y feeling but she never showed.  However, I am wondering if my body was gearing up for something that just didn't happen that month but milk was affected anyway.  It would make sense as the crying bouts have been 12, 16 and 20 weeks ... so 4 weekly.  Hmm

So confusing! Very difficult not knowing what is going on.  She is hungry, rooting but just will not latch on.  Usually chews/sucks her fingers instead.  Today I tucked both hands away and she latched on not bad but kept popping off trying to get hands    not sure what this indicates.  Teeth, reflux, AF?  I've given meds, teething liquid that Angela suggested so we'll just have to see what happens now.  On a positive note, it is stretching out feeds. LOL Be careful what you wish for and all that 

This evening she latched on like a champ, then pulled off after a while crying.  Wouldn't relatch but was rooting like mad.  I gave her gaviscon from the syringe which she usually spits out but she gulped it back so she is obviously hungry.  Tried the bottle  and she tried so hard for about 10 mins to take it but just couldn't work it out    Constantly taking it into her mouth, crying if I took it away.  Eventually bathed her and she took both sides from me at bedtime without a fuss.  Beats me. 

Thanks so much everyone for helping me through this 

Katie, your girls little button noses are adorable!! And identical!! 

[lisi's mum]

Katie, your girls little button noses are adorable!! And identical!! 

Dh to thank for that one, unfortunately the adult version is rather large, and in his words looks like a potato 

What about trying a different approach, Nicola? I was with a couple friends yesterday who have a 12 week old and a 9 week old. Neither bother put their LOs down for naps, they just pass out as and where, both have astonishing oversupply - between the 3 of us we did a pretty good impression of the Trafalgar square fountains. They however see their feeds as being fine though their kids are thrashing, gulping, chocking - they're gaining weight, what's the problem? So there I was stressing that I couldn't really put dd down for naps properly, having to defend swaddling, quiet etc etc, trying to make nice peaceful feeds and finding all these things that were going "wrong" with Norah's routine. Yesterday there was not an awful lot I could have done about it, so maybe it would have been better if I'd taken a leaf from their books and just seen everything as being fine.

Maybe as long as Callie's gaining ok assume she's fine and will get there. Obviously this is absolutely no long term solution  (let's not talk about how the 2 year olds of both of these friends still sleep not just in their parent's bed but one actually on top of her mother, and the other one feeds every 2 hours through the night - they're Lisi's age  ), but you've thought of almost all the logical reasons as to why things are difficult right now and still not hit the nail on the head. Maybe seeing what happens if you treat everything as being hunky dory, and let her get on with it, offering support, but not letting "poor baby" feeling get in the way?

I'm being incoherent, I know - sleep deprivation hasn't been outweighed by caffeine yet  but it was just my thoughts for yesterday. On that note, off to get Norah who's napped for a whole (you guessed it) 45 minutes

[*Nicola*]

Katie,

You know ... I was just saying to DP that I should maybe just trust her to take enough food and not worry about the rest.   

[Purplecattypants]

Did the Anbesol help any Nic?

[*Nicola*]

not one bit!! 

i am sure it is either AF or reflux related.  going to try bottle again today and see how that goes.  im hoping if i pesent it often enough she will get the hang of it!

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

not one bit!! 

i am sure it is either AF or reflux related.  going to try bottle again today and see how that goes.  im hoping if i pesent it often enough she will get the hang of it!

its worth a try

[Purplecattypants]

Oh pooh, sorry to hear that...it was worth a go though I guess! Hope you have some luck with the bottle...lots of "take that bottle Callie" vibes 

[*Nicola*]

Thanks guys! 

I am trying SO hard to be positive, do lots of relaxation breathing (hypnobirthing stylee  ) and not let it get to me, reminding myself it will pass etc etc ... just very difficult!

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

 

[rinajack]

I know all about it Nicola.

Hugh went from sleeping through, and now months later we are at 3-4 night feeds, his nights are awful, reflux related, how often we feed during the day seems to have no impact.

Be patient, it can't last forever - promise me, it can't last forever

[*Nicola*]

LOL Rina (((((hugs))))) my lovely 

[*Nicola*]

Well ... just been for weigh in.  She's dropped a fair bit on the charts and HV wants us to start on solids now.

she didn't have any insights on the screaming at feeds but was a bit concerned about her lack of weight gain. 

Feeling rather down now.