4 month old starting to have sleep problems

[seramommy]

Hi Everyone.

My name is Jody and I have two beautiful baby girls, Sera 2 and Rose 4 months. I had many many issues with getting Sera to nap and sleep. She is still not a good sleeper and doesn't require much sleep. She has not been napping since, oh geese, maybe 9 months??? Very hard on Mommy and she hasn't gotten any better with age. But she is a happy and healthy child so she just doesn't need as much sleep as the average child.

My problem now is my four month old Rose. I did have her sleeping in a swing downstairs for naps. And she did great with it, would go two to three hours at a time while she was a newborn. But now that she has hit 4 months she is only cat napping anywhere I put her to sleep. She won't sleep in the swing now unless she is already asleep when I put her in it. She is doing what Sera did and trying to fall asleep only after eating. I had her on a very good schedule from when she was 1 month to maybe 2 and half months old. But we got out of it doing things like going to playdates and just trying to get back to our 'normal routine' pre-Rose. We were pretty much going crazy in the house all day everyday.

I need some suggestions on how to get her to sleep in her crib for naps. And some support. Every time Rose starts this tired scream all the anxiety and frustration of Sera refusing to sleep comes right back. It would take me three hours to get Sera to sleep for 30 minutes. It eventually just wasn't worth my sanity to try and get her to sleep. I actually just fell into my old habit of nursing to sleep. If anyone also has ideas on what to do with a clingy two year old while getting Rose to nap that would be a big help too.

Thank you all so much!
Jody

[rob1lu2]

Hi Jody!

Welcome!

Can you tell me which Baby Whisperer books you have read? Also what temperment is Rose? And what EASY is she one? Also if you post your schedule, we can take a look at it and see if it needs any tweaks.

Thanks,
Lu

[seramommy]

I have read both books (I wish I had read them both before Sera was born!!!!) and they are currently both out on loan to other friends. I need to get them back and reread through them again. Rose is mostly an Angel baby, when she gets the sleep she needs she always wakes up happy and will play by herself for longer periods of time and not be fussy. When she doesn't sleep long enough she will wake up crying and is more clingy and just fussy.

I did have Rose on the 3 hour schedule easy, she went right on it, I even had to wake her to eat during the day. She was doing really good at night and going almost 6-7 hours without waking to eat. But her schedule is so messed up now that she is nursing almost all night long it seems (we co-sleep so I just pop her on and pass out again). I think she is ready to be put on the four hour EASY, she should not be eating every two hours like she is now.

I know one big change that needs to happen is moving the crib into our room and getting her to sleep in it. I will start with naps first. My main problem is what do I do with my two year old? She is very clingy. I don't want her in the room with me because that will distract Rose and probably wake her up. But if I am gone from Sera too long she will scream for me or just freak out. (yes, we have issues! I blame her father... he has the same problems as a young child.)

Right now Rose is waking anywhere from 7-8:30 in the morning. I am normally out of bed at 7 and my husband will get up when Sera wakes up and hears her on the monitor. If Rose was on the 3 hour EASY I know she would be eating again at 10. But she normally wants to eat at 9 and then 11 and then 1 and 3 and 5 and 7 and 9 and 11 and on and on! I know I am feeding her too much but she is constantly trying to get on the boob. She spit up frequently and then right after doing so wants to eat again.

[rob1lu2]

Right off the bat I would say tht it sounds like she needs to be on a 4 hour EASY for her age. Even newborns don't *really* need to eat 2hours a day, let alone a 4 month old.

I would also say that if she is feeding that much, it's possible that she wants to suck. Does she take a pacifier?

As for Sera, I suggest a special basket of toys that come out only when you have to manage Rose. Is that possible? Get her some toys/coloring books/regular books/dolls/dress up whatever, that she has helped select that you KNOW she likes, and pull it out when you are helping Rose.

Let me know what you think,
Lu

[seramommy]

My babies are very anti-paci once they get the boob. I tried giving her one last night and it just wans't doing it for her. Sera was the same way, could never get her to take one no matter how hard we tried. Rose was taking one fine when she was on formula and bottle feeding after birth, but when I switched her over to exclusively breastfeeding she decided she didn't want them anymore. It generally only works her up more if you try to give her a pacifier.

I figured out why she is wanting to eat so much, she was comfort nursing. She has a horrible diaper rash and I think this is part of our issue, she is very uncomfortable right now and wants what makes her feel better: Mommy holding her and suckling. I am not going to attempt anything until this rash goes away. It is frustrating but I have had to give her tylenol twice today (she is sleeping right now but hasn't slept for more than and hour and a half since being up at 7am.)she is in such pain. I feel bad for her, I have been airing her out for most of the day it feels like and as soon as the diaper gets back on it seems that it makes it worse all over again very quickly.

I think that I am going to try puting up the gate to Sera's room and letting her play in there while I put Rose down for naps. I need to go through her toys and put more in her room to get them out from underfoot downstairs so that will probably work best for us. I can't keep her in the same room as me because she will want the attention and wake Rose up again. (case in point: Sera just woke up my sleeping baby by yelling in a cardboard tube in her face. NOT a good wake up call for anyone. I am ready to kill her when she does stuff like that. I know she doesn't mean it but it is so frustrating when you just put your child down not ten minutes ago and she is overtired.)

Thanks for the suggestions. I am going to work out our diapering issues first and then I will be back to get her sleep isues all figured out.

[rob1lu2]

Is she maybe allergic to the diapers? Are you using cloth or disposables? Some babies are allergic to disposables.

So frustrating about the older sib. I know it can be tough for them, when the new baby comes and takes the attention. HUGS.

Let us know how it goes,
Lu