Am I running out of milk?

[Aly Mac]

Just not sure on this one?  wether I'm running out, or my girl is wanting that much milk, again!

I bf Lil once a day only, first thing in the morning. and she goes from 10mins each side to a good half hour all up, on and off.  I have been limiting her to 10 each side, so we are not there for an hour  but lately she is asking for more when I take her off.  I give her some cows milk and she takes some of that.  But she's quite upset when I tell her it's all gone.  Not for long, but you know, it makes me feel bad.  She has started to hit my breasts part way through, which in the past meant she wasn't getting as much as she wants. If my milk was going, wouldn't she get cranky and stop nursing??? Instead of keeping on sucking???

any advice would be appreciated!  oh, and yes, there is milk there, hence my confusion.

[lyndsy_p]

Aleesa, your milk could be lessening, or maybe the letdown isn't as intense as before...that's what mine did after about 3 weeks of morning nursing only.

[Aly Mac]

Thanks Lynds.  Is that when you ended up just giving her a sippy instead?  I'm a bit confused as she still wants to nurse, just not sure if she is just liking to nurse, or actually wanting and getting any milk.

[lyndsy_p]

Yes, we actually went to a bottle for a few days, then switched to a sippy. She was fine with it and never "asked" for the boobie.

If you remember she all but refused the boobie one morning (bottle of milk instead), so we tried the next morning just to be sure. She sucked a few minutes, but was unhappy. Gave her the bottle and she took more. The 3rd day we went straight to the bottle (and then the sippy) and haven't looked back since. <sigh>

[Aly Mac]

Thanks Lynds - the thing is she's not refusing it, she's wanting it more and more..... will see how it goes, and may have to go to the milk.... <sigh's> from me too 

[lisi's mum]

Aly, is she teething or otherwise out of sorts? Lisi always went big time to boobies at any time she had something wrong either emotionally or physically. You've been bf-ing longer than I ever did and surely know way better than me, but have you tried switch feeding every time she pulls off? It's one way of getting to milk quicker. I think Lisi must have become dizzy the amount of times I switched sides, but it did help her, she used to paw me like a kitten when she couldn't get milk quick enough.

[Aly Mac]

Hi Katie,

well she was a little off on monday, and it's cold here now, so I thought maybe she was just getting cuddly LOL.  Not teething that I can gather, but SA big time at the moment. Never thought about the two related (don't know why, when I did previously...)  She doesn't actually pull off. I have to take her off after 10 or so minutes,and immediately she points to my boobs and asks more.  she's slapping the boob about 3/4 into her 10 each side, but just keeps going.... I thought if it was the letdown being slow she would complain, not keep going.  I think she's just in love with my boobs!

I'll see how tomorrow goes and let you know what happens.

thanks for your advice. anyone else has any experience, happy to hear!

[Aly Mac]

Ok, update on today.  I did the 10mins each side this morning.  when I took her off the 2nd breast, she asked more and when I said it was all gone she complained, but we got up and I distracted her enough, so ok.  But she woke from her nap early and upset, and cried for nearly half an hour on and off afterwards.  Towards the end she was pulling at my shirt and asking milk?  I said there was none there til morning and got her some cows milk but that got her really upset - hands over her facing crying (so sad, and I felt so bad....).  I managed to calm her down (with a kids show on tv - what have i come too...?) and then gave her  lunch and she was fine.  Until later that afternoon, it happened again - same scenario - was on my lap and decided she wanted milk.  same before bed.  It got to the point where I couldn't have her on my lap without her wanting my milk......

does anyone know what is happening here? and the best way to handle it, while not feeding her?  she seems ok otherwise - it's rainy and cold here - maybe the weather LOL?

[lisi's mum]

It really could be sep anx as it doesn't sound hunger related. I have several friends of a more AP leaning who notice their toddlers going in phases as to how often they ask for milk, and it's usually emotionally based - one said it seemed that the more their LO was turning out to the big world, she'd need to then have a phase of reassurance and refinding her safe place, ie mummy and milk.
 

[Aly Mac]

thanks katie (sorry to pm you and the other mods...just not sure what to do for her).  she has had bad SA for a few days.  we went out Sat afternoon without her, and I did some chores yesterday for a couple of hours.  I don't leave her with other people much, except dh, so it could be that added in..... it's just so sad when she put her hands over her face and cried...... I dont' want to go backwards and feed her, as I think it would get worse, and don't want her pulling at me all the time......

thanks again...

[lisi's mum]

sorry, I'm battling with Norah and her 20 minute power naps as I write...

how to handle it without feeding her? I can only really say the obvious things - distraction, wearing a dress or some other thing so that she can't help herself so easily, hugs, stories and other reassuring one on one activities  so she can get all the cuddles and reassurance she needs without actually having milk.

What is your gut reaction as to what's up? 

[Aly Mac]

Well SA makes sense, but it's never manifested itself like this before.  The other theory (LOL) is that because I"m limiting her morning bf, she wants it more. does that make sense.  maybe limiting the morning is not the way to go...but if not, she would seriously be there an hour....

[lisi's mum]

That makes sense, but kind of a manifestation of the same thing - there's no way that she needs to be there for an hour for nutrition, but closeness. If it's at a point where you're no longer happy with the situation, or doing it her way do you think it may be time to stop all together?

Another thought on alternatives to feeding, I know somebody who's LO loves a cuddle with her hands on her mummy's breasts, though isn't feeding anymore. It seems to work for them...

[deckchariot]

oh Aly....big hugs to you!  I'm wondering too if it's not SA - you're such a comfort to her, and the boobs are sort of comfort personified.  I would think if it was a supply issue that she'd be protesting while on the breast, not just when it's taken away.  Katie's suggestions look good to me, I'm not really sure I have any new ideas.....I'll take a peak at some bfing lit that I have and see if I can come up with anything......

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

Hi, just wanted to send some hugs. I've never fed for that long so i really don't have any advice, sorry. But it looks to me like its just a comfort thing too and what Katie has suggested sounds like it might be worth a try.

Does she ask for milk?

Kate x