I am so desperate, can someone help me?

[nike]

It's great that she is self-settling during the night.  With a couple of NW's and another EW, I would still stick by nap around 11-11.30 and then bed by 6 or 6.30, Rachael. 

Why not give the early bedtime a go first and hopefully you can prove DH wrong *wink* in regard to a later bedtime = later wake-up.

I meant to ask in my last answer, hth do you manage to get her to stay in her bedroom from 4.30 to 6 a.m.!!!  I hope you're treating the EW as a NW, in effect, and offering no attention, play or anything.  Personally, knowing she NEEDS more sleep I would wait up to 20 minutes (perhaps longer if she's only whingeing) then go in with a torch or put a nightlight on or something - exactly the same routine as if you're attending to her for a NW'ing.  Offer her a drink of water, change her nappy (she might be one of those kids who doesn't like a full, heavy nappy?) and then tell her it's sleepytime still, lay her back down and walk out.  Minimal eye contact, minimal attention.  I would then leave her again for 20 minutes, or however long you can personally stand.  Put a pillow over your head and pop in the earplugs!  Remember that she will be clean, have had a drink and based on past experience should not be hungry til at least 7 a.m. from what you've told us.   Yes there are some kids who can get by on minimal sleep, but seeing as you're posting here as being "desperate", I assume she can't handle it, therefore you do need to reset her bodyclock iykwim.  You might also find those kiddies who do such a short sleep overnight make up for it with a longer nap, which is not the case with Maya. 

I still believe the key lies with an early bedtime.  Please give it a go, if only to prove your DH wong!!

xo

[Vicku]

Just sending some hugs and support from over here. How did today go?

[RACHPEM]

Hi vicku, thanks for thinking of me,  I am at work today so my mil has her, she took a 1hr 20 min nap just after 11.30.  i really dont know what to think now, so many people are telling me she is clearly OT and part of me thinks this but he other half is not sure whether to just go cold turkey and drag bedtime out , thinking she is only ever going to do 10-10,5 at night.
Rachael x

[Vicku]

I understand that must be so so confusing. I think you just have to go with your own instinct in the end on what to try... Also trying the really early bedtime for a few days might be worth it in case it works, it can't really make things THAT much worse, and if that doesn't help then go for the other route of fitting her sleep needs around a decent schedule Anyways I'm thinking of you and hoping things will improve very soon!

[RACHPEM]

Quick update ,asleep at 6.30 woke at 12 ish briefly, woke at 5am ignored her til 6.30.  I think she dropped back off between 5.45 til 6.30 so at least she had a little more sleep.
Rachaelx

[nike]

Rachael, that's fantatic!  Do you realise she slept effectively 12 hours   I realise she woke briefly overnight and then in the morning, but I mean without your intervention.  A huge leap forward towards getting onto a decent schedule. 

Do you think it was the earlier bedtime?  How did she nap yesterday?  Can you keep us updated with wake-up, nap and bedtime, just out of curiosity?

How do you feel?

[RACHPEM]

Hi Nike, she only napped 1hr 20 mins yesterday. And i=of course I will keep you upto date with everything, I kind of have to it helps me feel so much better when I do.  I would be even more lost without this website and all your support,
Thanks again.
Rachaelx

[RACHPEM]

Hi all, Maya slept for 1.5 hrs today, still at 11.30 so again I had her in bed for 6.30.  Should I stay with this for a few days and see what happens? I must admit she did not appear at all tired tonight although she has gone straight to sleep.
Rachael x

[NiknLily]

thats fab Rachel, fyi Lily never seems tired at bedtime but all being well is always asleep within 5/10mins.  I think if they are obviously tired then your heading to OT land.  Def keep it up for a few days and see where wake up goes from there :-)

[Vicku]

FWIW, Lois never seems tired at bed or naptime usually but will go to sleep quickly most of the time. Only if she's had a really short nap cos of being out and about, or mised sleep some other way will she seem obviously tired, so really only when OT or ill.

[nike]

Hi Rachael.  I think you're heading towards a routine...yay

Remember, consistency, consistency, consistency!!  1.5 hours is a great nap for her    Stick with the 6.30 p.m. bedtime.  The fact she's dropping off straight away is a great sign.  It's when they fluff around and take ages to settle that they're either OT or not sleepy enough in an otherwise well-rested child. 

I think I mentioned in another of my posts that my little guy also doesn't appear tired for his nap particularly, although gives clear tired signs of wanting to go to bed at night.  Remember my mother commenting that "he doesn't look tired" but I could just pick him up and put him to bed and he'd roll over and go to sleep.  Seems Maya is like this too, so you need to take control of her sleep times.

Should I stay with this for a few days and see what happens?

ABSOLUTELY!!  I'd say four days at least, but you might have hit upon the magic bed time with 6.30.  Stick with the consistent nap time (11.30ish) and bed time (6.30ish) and I can guarantee you things will improve

[RACHPEM]

Morning all.  Maya slept till 5.30!!!! 11hrs unteruppted sleep yay.  So do I still stick with said times even though 11.30 will make 6hrs A time?
Thanks, I know it is early days but I could not have done this without all your help and support.
Rachae;x

[nike]

FABULOUS

Maybe try 11/11.30, depending on how she's coping.  There's nothing wrong with giving her an earlier lunch and then a nap at this time (hopefully she'll be a bit more rested to be able to take a longer nap) and then please, please, stick with the early bedtime.  When she catches up a bit, she'll move her day forward, wake up later in the morning and then you can start pushing lunch and nap closer to the middle of the day.  I'd tread very slowly for a while, Rachael.  Be consistent.  No more 7.30 p.m. bedtime!!

I'm so thrilled for you

Btw, if she wakes early again, don't be disheartened.  Give the new routine a good chance to work.

[RACHPEM]

Just a little update, Maya took another 1.5 nap infact i think it was just over in bed by 6.30 but prob nearer 6.45 by the time she fell asleep.
Rachael x

[nike]

Another great nap for her   What time did you put her down?  How did she appear compared to previously I mean?

You're doing a great job, but I would try to be really strict about the bedtime now.  If you can manage it, aim to have her actually settled in her cot by 6.30 at the latest.  I think 15 minutes/1/2 an hour can make all the difference in her case.

Here's to you all catching some huge Z's tonight