Author Topic: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2  (Read 281313 times)

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Offline amynaturally

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #30 on: November 28, 2008, 20:48:10 pm »
Hi All
I have 21 month twin boys, 3 year old son and am due no. 4 in 9 weeks (yes I am mad).  The twins have been great sleepers during the day and our day used to start at 5.30 with daddy going to work.  This was fine as I like the evenings to myself and they were all in bed by 6.15 after sleeping a good 3 hours during day!
HOWEVER!!!! we are now waking at 4.30am every morning.  I have reduced day time naps and pushed bedtime to about 7pm and still no joy.  The person it effects most (apart from me) is my eldest son.  He no longer gets an afternoon nap as twins not asleep for long enough and he is ready to drop!
I guess I want to know if anyone can fill me in on wake to sleep?  My friend reckons I should wake them at 4 ish which I am happy to do but what do I do when awake?  how long do I keep them awake for? etc.
Thanks in advance
Amy

Offline emmayorkshire

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #31 on: November 29, 2008, 09:20:41 am »
When I've used Wake to Sleep I have gone into DS room 1 hour before his usual wake up and just stirred him enough so he opens his eyes (rub his tummy, stroke his forehead etc). He usually has a little moan at being disturbed, the turns over and goes back to sleep. You're not meant to fully wake them, pick them up etc. I am in and out of my son's room in 30 seconds, don't put the light on even. Do 3 days in a row, then see what happens on 4th night. If the cycle is not broken do another 3 days in a row (some people do 6 days in a row at this point- not sure which is right?) HTH
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Offline amynaturally

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #32 on: November 29, 2008, 19:27:17 pm »
Thanks for your reply.  Charlie woke at 2.30am this morning and I gave him a drink.  Tadhg woke at half 5 which I can live with for a while but my eldest, cillian, woke at 5 and got into my bed (which is unusual) and whispered / muttered / sang for half an hour!!!!  However, Charlie didnt wake till 6.15 which was great!
Will give it a try tonight.

Amy

Offline newmama12

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #33 on: January 15, 2009, 19:09:07 pm »
DD (21 months) is an early riser. Usually around 6am! I am having a hard time getting her daily schedule to work out. If you lo is an early riser:

what time to they nap?
how long is nap?
what time do they go to bed?

She's also takes a somewhat short nap (usually no longer than 1.5 hours). I'm curious to see what other early waking toddlers schedules are like so I can see if we're on the right track.  TIA!
~Cyndie
Mom to my Spirited DD (5) and Textbook DS (23 months) :)

Offline newmom11

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #34 on: January 20, 2009, 21:41:00 pm »
here is our typical schedule.  keep in mind my little guy is doing less and less sleep at night (still trying to work on extending his night sleep, but haven't had success in a month now...boo!), but anyway, here is our day:

awake 6:15 or 6:30
play in crib until 7
nap at 1:30, usually falls asleep by 1:45
sleeps until 3:45, wake by 4 if not already awake
in crib for the night at 8:45, usually asleep at the latest by 9pm

ps...my little guy is only 18 months and has always needed less sleep than the average kid. 

Offline katakow2

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #35 on: January 26, 2009, 01:15:40 am »
I think we belong here :(
HUGS to everyone else dealing with these way too early wake-ups!

Over the course of 6 months, DS has gradually been waking earlier and earlier.  It was always
7 am-ish and now it's between 4:30-5 am!  Here's our current schedule:

4:45 am- wake (I try to get him back to sleep, usually I can get about 15 more minutes out of him and then I just try to keep him quiet in his crib until 6 am when I bf)
9-9:35 am- AM catnap
1:30-2:30 pm- PM nap
7 pm- bedtime

Like many of you, I've tried it ALL- early & late bedtimes, early & late naps, longer & shorter A times, giving him (usually forcing him!) more & less sleep, starting the transition to 1 nap, more & less food, eliminating certain foods (maybe it's an allergy, grasping at straws here!)...  Obviously, I like my sleep :)

Here's to hoping that one of us will figure something out that works!  Sara :)




Offline tiny

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #36 on: January 28, 2009, 21:39:44 pm »
Hi,
Haven't been on here for ages but just happened to read this thread....

My gorgeous girly has always been an early waker (5:15 - 6:00) but the routine we have now seems to working for her and she has been sleeping later.


6:45 - 7:00ish wake up, we give her some milk and her dummy to have in bed (sometimes she goes back to sleep - heaven!)

7:30 - 8ish - come and chill in bed with mummy!

12:30 - 1ish (but definitely no earlier!)nap time (definitely don't let her sleep for longer than 1.5hrs)

5:30 - 6:00ish dinner

Bathtime, quiet games then bedtime routine and.....

8:00pm bed

The whole day used to be earlier and she would consistently wake up early, but once i shifted everything later and restricted her naps she started to catch up in the morn rather than in the middle of the day. I have to stick to this pretty much-no early naps, no long naps, no early bed time otherwise it's back to 5:30am.

Hope this is a bit of help xxx :)


Offline katakow2

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #37 on: January 29, 2009, 00:43:22 am »
tiny-
How old is your DD?
I think we're going to have to do something similar with DS.
Thanks for posting!  Sara :)



Offline kgrossman

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #38 on: February 01, 2009, 20:23:02 pm »
I am so happy to have found this support group, I feel that I am at the end of my rope.  I would really appreciate advice on what's worked for others.  Here's our situation...

My 18mo dd is a terrible sleeper and has been from the start.  Her issue is not being able to self soothe and put herself back to sleep once she's gotten the barebones minimum for survival.  For whatever reason, she wakes up (screaming) before she has gotten the sleep needed to make her rested and happy.  Then she is fussy and tired throughout the day.  She crashes for nap and bed b/c she's exhausted.  It's cyclical--up early then crash and burn.  I should say besides the early wake-ups, she does sleep through the night.

We visited Dr. Ferber (yes, the real guy).  He was helpful in explaining kids only need so much sleep and it's about reorganizing their sleep--so keep them awake until appropriate times and they will sleep longer.  Easier said then done, and for months we devoted our lives to keeping her awake.  At times she would fall asleep mid-air with us holding her upright b/c she was so tired.  Then she wouldn't sleep that long.  It started to improve and though naps were bad she would .  She does crash and burn.  It started to improve around 1yr and we went from 8-6/6:30.  I used to complain about 6.  Now I'd pay for it.

But for four weeks now it went from bad to horrible.  She wakes between 4:45-5:30 and screams.   Even with a bedtime as late as 8:30.  Sometimes we let her scream for 10-20 min and she goes back down for 45m-1h.   But often she does not go back to sleep.  Her naps are all across the board (1h-2 1/2h).  She's tired and looks it.  She cannot self soothe and get herself back to sleep once her survival sleep has been achieved. 

I want to reach out to other moms for advice as I find we're often better equipped and more understanding than the Drs.  Thx much.

Offline katakow2

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #39 on: February 02, 2009, 14:08:20 pm »
kgrossman-

So sorry to hear about your lo's sleep struggles, but we've all been there so you're definitely in the right place.  Huge HUGS to you!  It is just horrible seeing your baby soooo tired, but not willing to sleep as much as you know they need to!

I can try to offer some advice based on what I've tried and learned, but would need some other info. first on your dd's routine, how she currently goes to sleep, any other issues going on right now (teething, SA, allergies???),..
I'm sure that we can at least figure out something to TRY.  Isn't it all trial and error anyway?!

Also, I was thinking that you might have more luck/get more advice if you started a new post on the Toddler Sleep board.  Sara :)



Offline EloysH

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #40 on: February 26, 2009, 09:49:26 am »
Hey All,

Well EW's are back for us and I am desperate for some sleep. Please can someone look at what we're doing and offer some common sense, I just can't think logically anymore. I have a post on the toddler board too. I am waiting for some advice...

J is nearly 16 months and we've had EW's of average 5:30am for about 3 weeks  (I know that long compared to you guys!).  They started when molar 1, came up, and now it's through and molar 2 has come through too.  I do feel he is still "teething" we only have one corner of molar two and every second day or so he is very very clingly and irritable. We have not yet had a run of good days.  But we are stuck with EW's I think its a habital waking thing too.  LO is sooo tired and I can't fix it!

His routine
6-6:30am Wake   (now its 5:30am)
11:00am nap for 1.5 - 2 hours  (now hes tired by 10-10:30am and only naps 1.5 hours)
7pm bed

so he's losing an hour sleep every night due to EW.  Sometimes he catches up the sleep during his nap and has an extra long one of say 3 hours.
I am back at work and just can't concentrate past 3pm in the afternoon, I hit the wall. 
I have tried early bedtime -- he won't sleep longer than 11 hours at night so it just perpetuate the EW. He won't be resettled in the morning, he wakes right up so quickly.

Once we had EW's for about 2 months when he was alot younger and the only way we got rid of them was with a time change, when daylight savings came in. So really we didn't fix it ourselves.   I am interested to see what Tiny did ....  do you think we need to treat this as a daylight savings change and move everything forward? But how, we can barely keep him up till his usal bedtime let alone extend it.

Tiny:  how old is your LO?  Please please i hope the same age as mine!  I really really hope I can get that same miracle to work for us.  Can you tell us more?  I have so many questions that I would love to ask.  My LO defo uses nap time to catch up sleep, the npa length varies, however not the bedtime or the waketime.

ggrossman: ((hugs)) 

I think these are your key points:   

Quote: "My 18mo dd is a terrible sleeper and has been from the start.  Her issue is not being able to self soothe and put herself back to sleep once she's gotten the barebones minimum for survival. "

--- Does she need some general sleep training like PU/PD, to teach her to get to sleep herself?.. If you do this first then the night sleep and day sleep may resolve itself.

Quote: "For whatever reason, she wakes up (screaming) before she has gotten the sleep needed to make her rested and happy.  Then she is fussy and tired throughout the day.  She crashes for nap and bed b/c she's exhausted.  It's cyclical--up early then crash and burn.  I should say besides the early wake-ups, she does sleep through the night."

----- I think that this is the classic behaviour for an overtired LO. They are so OT that they can't have restful sleep anymore, and it doesn't resolve itself until they catch up their sleep.  So when they are in this state, you need make your priority for them to catch up sleep... sometimes it's not possible until some sleep training is implemented like PU/PD.


Sara:   The only thing I can think is it time for one nap? How old is LO??




 



Offline EloysH

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #41 on: February 26, 2009, 10:37:45 am »
Tiny: I posted too much, I hope you see my questions in post below.

Offline katakow2

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #42 on: February 26, 2009, 19:21:00 pm »
Eloise-
My lo is 13 months and I think you're right about 1 nap...  He's just so young still and so easily OT (and not so easily recovered from OT!), so I've been saving the final switch as last resort.  Thinking about doing a 30 min catnap in place of one of the naps somewhat soon here...

As for your lo, this is certainly not a long-term solution, but I would do some AP just to catch him up.  Maybe a car or stroller ride just before dinner to help him make it to bedtime?  Also, in our case, it helps to hold off that (AM) nap as long as possible so that he can't use it to catch up on night sleep.

kgrossman- I agree with Eloise..  how is it going for you?



Offline EloysH

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #43 on: February 27, 2009, 00:09:41 am »
Hi Sara,

Afternoon naps don't happen, we've really been trying for them. We can only get him down about 5:30pm which is soo late.  I am thinking of ethier putting him down at 5:30 for 45 mins then 8pm bedtime, or just pushing his whole schedule out half hour and see what happens.  I think the first idea is better as it allows him to catch up on more sleep.

I like Tiny's idea about not letting them catch up sleep in the day time nap. It seems logical, but in practice I am not sure.

Offline EloysH

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Re: Support and Chat thread for parents of Early Waking Toddlers #2
« Reply #44 on: February 28, 2009, 00:28:48 am »
YAY!!  We tried something new yesterday and it worked!   

So after a bit more research and hearing from people about what worked, I decided to push the whole routine half hour later.  Yesterday npa time was half hour later and bedtime 15 mins later. He had an unusually short nap - 1 hour.  Anyway he woke at 6:30am today yay!!!   We will sticvk with this for a while and see where it takes us....

There is hope!