Help! 9 Month Old Waking Again to Feed

[nada]

Hello! I am desperate. For the last few weeks, my nine month old, who had been sleeping through the night pretty consistently since 6 months old, is now waking to feed. She generally wakes between 10-11 and around 4, but sometimes at other times as well. Usually I nurse her and she will go back to sleep, but if I don't nurse her or if my husband goes in she is VERY VERY upset and impossible to settle. I don't understand as she is an amazingly good eater of solid foods, but she nurses only very briefly during the day. She nurses very well in the morning and okay at bedtime, but the rest of the time it's only for a couple of minutes!
Here's her schedule:
6-7 Wakes up sometime in this hour, usually around 6:30
Nurse (longest nursing session, around 20 minutes if she hasn't eaten during the night), breakfast of yogurt, fruit puree and cereal
9 a.m. Nap. This tends to be the best nap, and on a good day it can be an hour and 15 minutes or an hour and a half
10:30-11 Eat. Nurse then solid foods. Eats alot - up to 10 oz of solids.
12-1 Second nap, depending on when she woke up from first and how tired she is.
Eat: Nurse then solids. Again, she usually eats a lot.
3-4: Variable third nap, if her first two weren't good.
Eat: Nurse, then solids at dinnertime, around 5:30. She eats A LOT at dinner, sometimes as much as 20 ounces of food!
7: Bedtime, after bathing, nursing, book, etc.

She is also kind of difficult to settle. She insists on standing in her crib, and I keep having to lay her down. Sometimes I leave the room and keep coming back in to check on her if she isn't crying or if she is just fussing a little, and then when she finally seems ready I stay in the room with her and put my hand on her until she sleeps. She uses a pacifier but is not overly fond of it and sometimes falls asleep without it.

She is very active and wants to stand all the time, even in the bathtub! She is also teething, of course. Please help. I know I've been practicing accidental parenting by feeding her in the night, but I am so tired and I desperately want to get back to sleep. I also don't want her to wake her two year old sister in the next room.

[LaurieJ]

My DD just turned 9 months and has been having issues with nw's too...many things sound similar to yours.  I posted on here about it as well and have gotten some great advice that I've been working on...http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=132582.0. 

It sounds like your DD is filling up on solids during the day and is probably not hungry to nurse due to that.  What I've read that others have suggested is to cut back on the solids so she would be more apt to nurse longer since she wouldn't be so full from the solids.  She definitely needs to get the majority of her nutrition from nursing rather than solids at this age (at least until she is 12 months). 

The nursing at night could also be due to the 9 month growth spurt, but if it's still happening then maybe she went through the 9 month growth spurt and got used to nursing at night so she's continuing to.  I've read that some babies need to nurse once in the night until a later age than others, but I don't know if that is the case when they were sttn well before that.  My DD sttn from about 7 months until a few weeks ago (a little before she turned 9 months) and we've been working on the nw as well as needing night feeds since then.  She, just like your DD, is eating 2 times a night now which I am trying to at least cut down to one.  My DD didn't gain a lot of weight between her 6 month and 9 month appt. so she just might need one night feed right now.  She is very active and is burning a lot of calories during the day so I'm trying to get more calories (especially from nursing) in during the day.

Another thing that is really important is to not let her fall all the way asleep when you nurse her at night otherwise she is just using this as her prop and will have to have that in order to get back to sleep.  She needs to realize when the feed is done and that she is going back in her crib.  Does she take a full feed at both of her night feeds or does she just seem to nurse for the comfort to get back to sleep?  I am also using the walk in/walk out strategy (I posted the link below) during the night for the night wakings as well as for putting to bed for naps or bed time...that might be really helpful especially if she is just using nursing as a prop at night and not acutally needing the feed.  BUT, it is harder I'm sure when you have a 2 year old that you don't want to wake up.  My DD does really well with the walk in/walk out and doesn't cry long at all because you don't leave them to cry (which is the point - you're not leaving them to just cry...you go RIGHT back in RIGHT when they start crying so that they don't feel abandoned and they know that you are there and you help them settle just not all the way to sleep...that's what they learn how to do). 

The nw can also be due to separation anxiety.  I've been using the walk in/walk out strategy which has been helping a lot to help settle her and have her fall back asleep without me having my hand on her the whole time until she falls asleep (because then if they fall asleep with your hand on them they expect it to be there when they wake up)...http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=62612.0.  My DD is doing the keep standing up thing too and what I've read is to let them stand up all the way and then you put them from standing to laying down without picking them up to hold them and say something like, "It's time to go night night," and then do what it says in the link for the walk in/walk out with staying with them until they are calm and then saying something again like, "Night night," and then walking out (then coming right back in when they start crying and going through the process again).  This has been working really well with my DD and is taking less and less time for her to settle herself and drift back off to sleep on her own (without my hand being on her).  It helps her see that I am actually walking out of the room so she doesn't expect me to be there when she wakes up.  But she also feels safe and calm because I stay with her until she is at that point but then I walk out so she can get herself to sleep without needing me as a prop. 

Well, I know you'll get great advice on here...you can also (if you haven't already) look through the other posts some because there are a few others with 9 month olds having issues with nw similar to ours and there is a lot of great advice on those. 

There is so much going on at the 9 month age all at once!! 

[nada]

I am so sorry I didn't thank you for your input sooner. I did find your post after I had already posted my own, and it was so helpful, as was the information above. THANK YOU! The whole house has been sick so I've just been laying low, but I'm going to try your ideas! Best of luck to you wiht your little one. My Eva was born 5 days after your baby!

[LaurieJ]

That's ok!!  We're still working on things here...my DD is definitely cutting her top 2 teeth now. Still having issues with nw's that I'm trying to figure out!!!  Arrgh!

That's neat that our LOs were born so close in time!   I love the name Eva!! 

I hope your fam starts feeling better!!!