Shhh Pat doesn't work?

[BabyJonasBG]

I have a question... what do you do when shhh pat doesn't put your LO back to sleep?

I have a spirited baby, 3 months old. if he wakes to the point of crying, shhh pat doesn't work. he only gets more upset and starting rolling over on his tummy and grunting and crying and there is no going back to sleep at that point. if I get to him before he is crying then it works sometimes but if i am sleeping and don't hear him until he cries then this is what happens.

Am I doing something wrong? I haven't tried PUPD because he is still to little i think.

Thanks!

[ElsMom]

Hi there! I've got a spirited one, too - it's loads of fun, but exhausting, I know! My DD (now 15 months) didn't like traditional shh pat either, but I randomly discovered that she liked being patted kind of in an upward direction on her bottom so her body kind of moved up and down on the mattress (she started rolling over at 6 weeks and became a tummy sleeper). If she was already crying, though, I had to pick her up to calm her down, and then I could put her down and pat her bottom until she dozed off (I got in a terrible AP habit of patting her all the way back to sleep and don't recommend it, but it's great for getting them drowsy).

What do you do when shh pat doesn't work? I think it's ok to pick him up, as long as he doesn't have to be in your arms to fall asleep. If you pick him up and calm him, then will he go back down on his own? Do you offer breast or bottle when he wakes at night? How often is he waking for you?

[BabyJonasBG]

I am just now starting BW and am ashamed now to admit that I would put him on my chest and sleep with him! It was out of sheer exhaustion!

He sleeps well from 7:30 to 1 am or so and then jerks himself awake every hour after that. He takes a bottle about 2 am. Left to his own devices, he'd be up at 5:30 am (and sometimes he is) but I put him on my chest and pat his back to get him to sleep until 6:30am.
He is a light sleeper, the slightest noise wakes him, just like his dad.

A couple nights ago I tried just giving him a paci and not picking him up and it worked but I ended up standing there holding a paci most of the night, so that won't work. It's just a prop right now, he's not big enough to put it back in his mouth on his own.

I am reading the BW book now, and am getting him on the 3 hour routine. But I gotta admit, I wish it was ESAY because he loves to fall asleep on the bottle and he sleeps so much better that way. Yesterday, he fell asleep on his 1pm bottle and I laid him in the floor figuring with all the noise he'd be up in a second. he slept 2 hours and didn't care about noise at all!! Plus he winds down during a feeding and it is so hard to wind him down sometimes.

PS - Starting a few weeks ago, when he began finding and using his hands, he started going nuts when I would swaddle his arms in. He'd cry and try to wiggle them out. So I swaddle him from armpits down or most of the time not at all.

[helenfinnandben]

Hiya - have you seent eh thread on 4m old spirited baby (mine!) - your lo sounds very like mine in a lot of ways so you may pick some tips up there! Hope we can both get some decent nights' sleep soon!

[deb]

Shh/pat didn't work here either. I decided to stop spending hour after hour day after day on it and get back to my life (and Josie's too, as I was neglecting her trying to get Nat to sleep! ).

I broke down and used the Baby Bjorn or sling if nothing else worked, or just held her to sleep while J and I read books or played quietly together. I also shamelessly took the kids on errands so Nat would nap in the car and I could put her in bed when we got home. Time passed and while Nat still (at 3YO) wants us with her to fall asleep at night, the rest of the time she's become quite an independent child (who this past weekend painted her own fingernails and toenails AND cleaned up herself! ), so in the long run I'd say it's worth it for us. Each family needs to make its own decision, but I found that by working with my kid and who she was/is, it saved me broken hopes and dreams of putting down an "Angle baby that I just didn't have! (And I mean that with love and admiration for who she is, BTW.

I did get good at working out when she was asleep enough to take out of a carrier and put in bed for times when I needed my body free (shower, laundry, mowing lawn, sanity, that kind of thing).