not sleeping well since 3m GS

[SylvieA]

DD has been waking twice per night since she had a GS at 3mo and hasn't stopped yet. Before she had been waking once since she was 4-5 weeks old. I changed her routine to a 3.5hr, and it didn't change a thing. Now I beleive she's having her 4mo GS. She woke every 2-3 hrs last night which made it 3NW and then woke at 7 this morning for the day. Now is it common for it to get better after 4m GS. She is so different from what DS was when it comes to sleep that I have no clue.

[speechie]

Hi and hugs, every LO is so different...
Do you think it's possible your LO is waking out of habit/same times every night, or is your LO taking a full feed when NW happen?

[SylvieA]

Thanks Speechie, I think she is just waking to have a nibble at the breast. She'll nurse for just a few minutes and falls asleep. Her waking times are not always the same time but always between 12-1, 3-4, 6-7. This is a LO that used to have her last feed at 630-7pm and was good till 3-4am then 7-8am. Her additional NW started during her 3m GS. I have no clue how to fix it. I do not believe in letting her cry, even for a minute. Now what would you consider crying. If she's fussing would you let her be, I'm just afraid if I let her, she'll get into a full out cry and wake everyone.

[speechie]

Hi-could you post your schedule including feeding times (approximate, anyway)? Are you doing a dreamfeed? Hopefully if it's a growth spurt it will pass,...
I too rarely let my LO really cry- I just couldn't bear it! Well, he DID cry a lot, but I didn't let him cry alone, if that makes sense.
 I did wind up with a paci addict, and I helped to wean him off it which reduced NWs...Does your LO resettle in the night if your DP/DH goes in?

[SylvieA]

This is what our day somewhat looks like in the last week

630 She wakes, since we had a bad night I bring her to bed, she nurses as we sleep a bit more
730 out of bed & activity time
930 sleep(45min)
1015 wake & feed
12 wind down and sleep. (she falls asleep almost instantly)
1 wakes(45min napper) then I put her in the swing for another hr as she will not fall asleep otherwise (sh/pat never worked for her)
2 wake & feed
4 sleeps 45min-1hr in the swing
5 feed & activity 
6 start bedtime routine
630 top up feed
bed by 7

and then NW begin at 1am but last night her first one was at 1145pm, and woke every 2hrs after. She used to be such a good night sleeper with only one NW and no DF. I found she woke more but I guess it would make no difference now since she does anyways.

So she feeds every 3-4hrs, and is awake for 1.75-2hrs and rarely naps more than 45 mins.

Can the swaddle affect their sleep at this age. I tried 1 arm out yesterday for one of her naps and she only slept for 1/2 hr. I wonder if I should wean her from it. I'll go check out the prop boards.

[bennysmama]

Hi Sylvie,  first of all hugs to you! 

You must be sooo tired.   This sounds very, very similar to what DS did at that age.  IT GETS BETTER!!  (hope I haven't jinxed myself typing that). 

A couple of ideas:

1.  How long is each feed taking?  Has she got to the stage where everything is a distraction?  Just wondering if maybe she's making up food intake at night.  In which case, you could try draping a muslin over her head and your boob while she feeds (sounds odd, looks weird, but works!).  Easiest way is to pop a corner under your bra strap at the shoulder, then drape.

2.  Have you tried playing around with A times a little - extending or decreasing by 15 mins to see what gives a longer nap.  Your morning A time looks like its between 2 and 3 hours which might be a little too long, giving you an OT nap(?).     

4.  an exact 12 hour day - eg up at 7am, down for bed at 7pm

5.  adding in a dreamfeed at no later than 2230. 

It took about two weeks to get DS into a nice pattern of "only" (!) waking at 4am and taking one decent-length nap a day.  That said, last night we had an 0150 waking, so it might be a case of "take my advice, I'm not using it"....

HTH
Em   

     

[yaya]

Hello!
So how old is you LO now?
How does she go to sleep?
How do you deal with NWs?
Is she BF FF or or solids?

Thanks, will see if anything jumps out at me X

[SylvieA]

Thanks Em

During the day the feeds are between 15-20 mins. She's always been a quick nurser. At night though she only nurses for maybe 5 mins. She doesn't seem hungry. I tried all A time length possible, and in the morning when I nurse in bed she falls asleep after about 15min, so her uninterupted A time is never more than 2hrs.

Yaya, DD is 16weeks tomorrow. And as far as sleep, I swaddles, cuddle a bit, then put to bed and she falls aslee on her own. I've tried the paci but she doesn't like it much, so 90% of the time she falls asleep without, but sometimes if she is a bit to tired I'll let her suckle the breast to calm her and then falls asleep in her bed. And for NW, I don't let her cry or whine and go to her almost instanly because I don't want her waking DH and DS. I tried picking her up and patting he back, but doesn't work everytime, if that doesn't work I nurse her, then she falls asleep. We haven't  started solids and don't plan on doing so for another few months. I'm just wondering though if it would help to add a bit of cereal, my thought is it would make things worst. She is a very good nurser and has always been. What I can't understand is how could she be doing 8-9hrs stretch and suddenly stop. I know she has the ability to do so and that's what frustrates me. From 4-5weeks old, she only had one NW and no DF. I've been trying to tweak her routine for the past month and nothing changes anything. She is still in our room, but we only have 2 bedrooms, so I can't put her into the other room until she sleeps descent so she doesn't wake DS.

[bennysmama]

Hmm...a couple more ideas:

So your DD nurses a little bit to get off to sleep if she is too tired and nurses only 5 mins during NWs. Maybe your DD has started to rely on it a little and the nursing has become a prop?

I know this is soooo hard when you don't want DH to wake up, but is there any way you could leave going to her for a little longer? (just for, say, a count of 50)  just to see if she goes back to sleep after making noises in the night?    Reason I ask is DS does this quite a bit.  It sounds like he's gearing up for a cry, then he sort of mumbles and goes back to sleep again.   

Everything I've read says DON'T add cereal at this age! 

Is it possible she could be overstimulated?

I'd give the dreamfeed a whirl for a couple of days.  It ought, at least, to cut out one of the wakings....

Hugs

x
Em

[SylvieA]

Still having lots of NW. I think I've come to understand why it's happening. She will not stop crying/whinning until I put her to the boob. I've become a prop to her for comfort at night, as she doesn't take the soother If I try to give it. Sometimes I wish we had a paci addiction instead of a boob addiction. Then I' know when she's hungry vs comfort. DH is gonna help me tackle this. I'll be pumping a bottle before going to bed and DH will take care of NW for a few nights. I think this might fix the problem, and I'll have a good night sleep in the downstairs bedroom.

[speechie]

Good luck- keep us posted. My only advice is to be consistent for several nights and be prepared for some crying, but it will be to your DD's benefit to tackle this if you have become a prop. My son became much happier, well rested once he was off the paci prop...
Hugs and hoping for some sleep for you!

[yaya]

Sounds like a great plan and it really does sound like a nurse to sleep issue. It's easy to resolve with consistency and you sounds really determined, well done!