Sleeps at door & kicks door

[willowonyx]

Two issues.

My DD is 29 months and has been sleeping against her closed door for the last 4 months.  We converted her crib to a toddler bed w/guard rail when she was 2.  She slept in it for maybe 2 weeks (which was after a few months of SA/OT). If we put her in the bed in the middle of the night, she just gets back out to her spot on the floor whenever she wakes up.

The other issue is that whenever she wakes up she constantly kicks the door until we go in or tell her to stop (can take a couple of times).  Sometimes she is lightly crying (whining) or talking.

Is this just a phase?  Do we just "ignore it" and wait for it to pass?

[RyansMum]

Does she just not like the bed?  Is it not very comfy?  Have you tried to let her take ownership of the bed, like picking out bedding, what toys go on and in the bed with her, where it is in the room? Perhaps move it closer to the door?

[Fiona (Leah & Kians Mom)]

Maybe she is scared of sleeping in the bed? too high off the ground? could you try putting the mattress on the floor and see if she will sleep on it. Is there maybe a light shining in under the door which she likes to see but cant from her bed? DD liked to see the light coming from the night light on the landing at her age.

[willowonyx]

Does she just not like the bed?  Is it not very comfy?  Have you tried to let her take ownership of the bed, like picking out bedding, what toys go on and in the bed with her, where it is in the room? Perhaps move it closer to the door?

That was one thing that we thought about too, but it is the same mattress that she has had since birth.  I just made her some Tinkerbell sheets and pillow cover to see if that would entice her, since she LOVES TInkerbell.  She has like 6 stuffed animals she insists on being in her bed with her, but she snuggles with two stuffed kitties and a blanket. We have thought about moving it closer to the door....that was our next attempt.

[willowonyx]

Maybe she is scared of sleeping in the bed? too high off the ground? could you try putting the mattress on the floor and see if she will sleep on it. Is there maybe a light shining in under the door which she likes to see but cant from her bed? DD liked to see the light coming from the night light on the landing at her age.

It is the same bed she has had since birth and is only a foot off the ground.  Yeah, I could try to put the mattress on the floor and see if that changes anything. There is a night light in the hall but she also has one in her room. 

We have tried asking her why she doesn't sleep in her bed and she completely ignores us like she does hear us.

[clh]

We have tried asking her why she doesn't sleep in her bed and she completely ignores us like she does hear us.

FWIW, I still have only limited success getting James to tell me *why* about something. 

No advice about your original questions, though. 

[willowonyx]

Okay, so we have tried the mattress on the floor where she normally lays by the door, and she will just sleep on the floor next to it or move it out of the way.

We have tried moving her converted crib next to the door and now all she does is play with the light switch and still sleeps on the floor, right up on the door crack.

I have made special Tinker Bell sheets, we have talks about no sleeping on the floor, no kicking the door, no turning on the light (it is almost a song), but she just does not implement it. 

And then last night, she took an hour to go to sleep between calling out for us, turning on the light, kicking the door, taking off her clothes (which she made us put on a 2 piece PJ's instead of her sleeper) and then after all of this, she woke up and starting yelling/kicking the door at 1:30, 2:30 etc....until it was time to get her up at 6:30.

What should I do?  Move her bed back to where it was, so she can not get to the light? Just ignore her not sleeping in her bed?

I am getting a little desperate here.  We went through 2 months of NO sleep right after she turned 2 due to SA issues and had about a month of peace and now we are back to getting no sleep again.

[Zoey]

Hmmmm

What would happen if you opened the door and put a gate up?

Perhaps a real twin bed?  Maybe she is over sleeping in the toddler bed?

What happens when she is crying or yelling out for you and DH?

When she is kicking the door, what do you do?

What's her routine like?  When exactly did this begin and can you think of ANYTHING the is different now about her room or her routine or things in the house, people ect?

When she was having SA and was OT what was her bedtime like then?  How did you help her through that period?

[Leesa]

We have the exact same problem!
Before we retire for the night, we go in her room and put her back into bed.
It's taken 6 mths of this but she now stays in bed.

Lisa

[willowonyx]

Hmmmm

What would happen if you opened the door and put a gate up?

Perhaps a real twin bed?  Maybe she is over sleeping in the toddler bed?

What happens when she is crying or yelling out for you and DH?

When she is kicking the door, what do you do?

What's her routine like?  When exactly did this begin and can you think of ANYTHING the is different now about her room or her routine or things in the house, people ect?

When she was having SA and was OT what was her bedtime like then?  How did you help her through that period?

I think that if we put up a gate, she would either try to climb out over it or stand there and yell for us.  But it is worth a try.....

I was thinking about her possibly not likeing her toddler bed but was hoping to be able to wait on going shopping for a new one with her when we were sure a new one was coming......which will hopefully be this year.

When she cries out for either one of us, unless it is a cry that is real, we just "ignore it". If I go in at any point she gets worse if I try to leave.  DH is the one who usually has to tend to her.

When she kicks the door, we either tell her to stop through the doorway and remind her that she is not to do that, or go in and tell her to stop.  Again, DH has to do a majority of this, because if I even speak to her, she gets upset or more upset.

She has been on basically the same routine since she was born, with some changes along the way....
wake 6:30am
nap 12-2pm
bedtime (after bath & wind-down) 7pm (usually asleep by 7:30pm) 

It is hard to pin point exactly when it started because she has been having issues one way or the other since she turned 2....that is when we took off the one side of the crib to make a toddler bed and put on the guard rail.  The not wanting to sleep in the bed definitely came after the 2 months of SA and got gradually worse and then the kicking started 3 weeks ago. Nothing at all had changed in her room....until last week when I moved the bed closer to the door.  Nothing has changed in the house at all through the last 5 months of her having issues. She is not cutting any molars, there are no signs of any of them, she is not sick.......

When she was having SA & OT, I did the gradual withdraw method and then had to go away for business for 5 days and when I came back, everything was "better".

[willowonyx]

We have the exact same problem!
Before we retire for the night, we go in her room and put her back into bed.
It's taken 6 mths of this but she now stays in bed.

Lisa

Lisa,

We have tried that ourselves and then when she wakes up and finds herself in the bed, she starts crying and calling out for us.

[RyansMum]

Do you think she is actually tired when she goes to bed. I only ask as my son dropped his naps just after he turned 2.5. I wonder if she still has bags of energy and is also testing her boundaries at the moment.

I also wonder if the mattress is the factor if she won't sleep on it even on the floor?

[Leesa]

We have the exact same problem!
Before we retire for the night, we go in her room and put her back into bed.
It's taken 6 mths of this but she now stays in bed.

Lisa

Lisa,

We have tried that ourselves and then when she wakes up and finds herself in the bed, she starts crying and calling out for us.

Yes Maddy does that too.  She's getting better though.  We are going to be buying her a double bed on boxing day in hopes that it is more cozy.  I frankly think that her toddler bed is just too small and cramped feeling for her to enjoy staying in it.

Lisa

[willowonyx]

Do you think she is actually tired when she goes to bed. I only ask as my son dropped his naps just after he turned 2.5. I wonder if she still has bags of energy and is also testing her boundaries at the moment.

I also wonder if the mattress is the factor if she won't sleep on it even on the floor?

I think she still needs her nap, even when she sleeps a good night, she usually tanks for her nap at daycare. One thought I have about her naps during the weekend is that she may not be as tired or wornout as she gets at daycare.

Yeah, the mattress may be too soft for her.

[willowonyx]

We have the exact same problem!
Before we retire for the night, we go in her room and put her back into bed.
It's taken 6 mths of this but she now stays in bed.

Lisa

Lisa,

We have tried that ourselves and then when she wakes up and finds herself in the bed, she starts crying and calling out for us.

Yes Maddy does that too.  She's getting better though.  We are going to be buying her a double bed on boxing day in hopes that it is more cozy.  I frankly think that her toddler bed is just too small and cramped feeling for her to enjoy staying in it.

Lisa

Yeah, I can see the toddler bed with the guard rail feeling too small for her now.