Support for dropping the last nap age 2-3 yrs

[sherry lynn]

Well at least for once teething is going in your favor, right

YEY to the later wake up. We had two good days like that last week. But we are back to about 5:15-5:45 again. For no apparent reason. The last two days nap has only been 2 hours. Both mornings he seemed OT. Sigh. Oh well.

[EloysH]

short lived sleep ins but well appreciated eh? 

[jcsmom]

Hi ladies,
It has been awhile since I have been here. Mostly just lurking. My DS is now almost 3 (will be in March) and I think he is beginning to drop his nap. I am going insane trying to get him to nap and go to bed at night and I need some advice for how to deal with it. Here is what our routine was until a few weeks ago:

7-8am wake usually 7am
1-2:30 nap
9pm bed asleep anywhere btw 9 and 10 usually 9pm
So generally 10 at night 1.5 in the day. He has always needed less sleep than average. He used to go right to sleep and sleep more in the day but he has shortened his nap and now his night. Some nights he is getting only 9-9.5 and is an absolute nightmare to get to sleep at night. He has started to fight naps now too. As we speak, after an hour of wi/wo I decided to let him have some quiet time in his room watching a DVD. He is staying there so I guess that is ok.
My questions:

Do I drop the nap cold turkey since he is refusing at home anyway?
Do I let him continue to nap at daycare? If so do I keep bedtime late?
On no nap days what time is bedtime?
What in the world do you do all day with a pre-schooler when they don't nap?

Thanks!

[EloysH]

Sounds like he is more than ready for a short nap or no nap.  I would ease into it by letting him nap for 30 mins or so most days.  Personally I would not go cold turkey, I have eben finding by day 3 of no nap LO is an absolute mess!!   

If he is fighting the nap --- can you work it so that  he will rest in bed without fighting it?  Make it out to him that it's rest time, set some firm rules about what he is allowed to do at rest time. Talk about the new rest time rules for a few days so he gets the hang of it.  For example  he just needs to lie down in his bed with his books, he only has to rest, not sleep. He can have an extra pillow so he can be propped up and read, but must stay in bed.  That way, no matter what he is still getting down time and even a short nap.  At least if he doesn't sleep he is getting some time out.

On the no nap day you should be able to bring the bedtime foward .. hopefully by an hour.
I would do the same at daycar. Tell them he still needs the down time and should rest, and to wake him after 30 mins or so.


On a  no nap day, things are pretty shakey in our house by 5pm. On day 2 or 3 or no nap is is meltdown after meltdown.   I bring dinner forward an hour, bath time forward, and bedtime forward one hour.   We just do low key activities, like puzzles, books, pretend games like shops, playing naimals in the jungle etc. TV is used if desperate, he can help mum  pepare food in the kitchen, no visitors, no outings, no running games, no rumbling with Dad, no riding the bike outside. Bascially any activites that will trigger a tantrum or frustration is avoided.

[OliverRowland]

Eloise, my ds is a mess as well after 2 straight days of no nap.  Do you have any idea how long it might take for greater tolerance for more consecutive no nap days?

[EloysH]

I think it depends alot on temperament .  Some kids seem to be ok after few weeks,  but most take a few months I think. We have been going for a few months now, missing naps every other day.  If he is teething, he is alot worse.  If not teething, he is still ok on Day 2.   But DS is a touchy temperament and is less able to tolerate tiredness than others, and needs to go to sleep the same time every night and wake same time every day.   If he has one hour less sleep at night, it comes out in his behaviour the next day.  Even as baby he would be  screaming and carrying on for a good 30 min's if he was tired.  So I would say my DS will take longer than others to adjust.

[heidiruthie]

i too have a touchy ds and when he dropped his last nap about 3 months ago, it was really tough for awhile. i would say it took about 1 or 2 months until he adjusted without needing to nap at all. he still will occasionally fall asleep in the car or even sometimes on the couch, but that only happens once a week at the most. both dh and i are so relieved that he has gotten over being such a bear from mid-afternoon on! so there is hope

[EloysH]

well we are getting naps more often than not now. The later nap time and bedtime is working well for us, now that J is not teething.
6am wake
1:30pm nap (asleep by 2pm)
4pm wake
8:15pm bed

he's been sleeping in till 6:45am for the last week which was lovely, but now that he's not teething, back to 6am on the dot!  So looking to cut the nap again, so the nights don't get too short.

[mylittlelovelies]

hi everyone,

love some nap dropping advice!

my dd is 2 years 7 months and has always needed less sleep than average. A typical day for her is...

7am wake
2pm nap (for 1.5 to 2 hrs)
8pm bedtime

only problem is that her 8pm bedtime is turning into 9pm or later as she is taking so long to go to sleep. We are getting HEAPS of stalling, calling out, asking for extra drinks etc. etc. as she simply isn't tired enough at bedtime to go to sleep. I feel bad getting cranky at her for calling out when i know that she prob just isn't tired enough yet.

We are also getting some NWs that we've not had for months and months. She usually never wakes at night, but now if she does wake (if she does it will only be once a night, but its happening more and more often) it can take her up to 2 hrs to get back to sleep. She stays in her bed and is being very patient really, she'll jsut call out every 30 mins or so and i go in tuck her back in, sing a lullaby and leave, but she will still be awake another 30mins later. This can go on for 2hrs! Are NWs like this a sign its time to drop or cut the nap???

For a little while she was skipping her nap quite often, but by moving her nap later and later in the day i've been able to get her to keep it, but now i'm thinking its getting too late and i need to make a change. Today it was 2-4pm, and she's still awake at 9:15pm..has been in bed for an hour

It seems like because her nap is so late she's having longer naps than ever (she used to only do 1hr 20) but thats too much for her.

Should i put the nap earlier in the day eg, 1:30 instead of 2pm, so that some days she doesn't nap...just ends up resting. Or should i keep a late nap at 2pm so she will definitely fall asleep, but wake her after just an hour or something??

Its SO HARD to let the nap go, but i feel bad for her at bedtime when it takes forever for her to fall asleep or in the night when she's wide awake in her room by herself for ages.

what do people think???

thanks
Jessie

[katemom]

Jessie - my dd is 3 years, 2 months and we're still in this too...but we've had a lot of success with cutting the nap length.  I don't let her sleep longer than an hour anymore, unless she had an unusually short night or something.  Our schedule looks like this:

7:00 awake
1:00 in her room
1:30 asleep if she's going to fall asleep
2:15 or 2:30 I wake her
7:30 bedtime

She is not napping a lot of the days now - like she'll sleep one or two days in a row, and not for 2 days, etc.  It seems like she handles it all a lot better if she can just have a little nap when she can.  But yeah, if she slept for 1.5-2 hours every day, it would rob her night sleep.  I'd rather have her be awake on her own during the day for quiet time than down for bed way before she was ready to go to sleep.

I hope that helps...

katemom

[mylittlelovelies]

thanks katemom for your advice and encouragement

Its been pretty difficult at bedtime at the moment. Lots of tears and difficulty letting me go, wanting mummy a LOT. I think some nap dropping issues combined with a delayed reaction to her 7 month old younger sister who has just started crawling, pulling up to stand, teething, etc and is all of a sudden very demanding after being quite a placid angel baby up to this point.

I definitly think the nap needs to be shortened, but its confusing as she is so clingy and insecure at the moment its hard to work out what bedtime issues are routine related, and which are relational. Last night it took two hours of crying and protesting - with us right there with her (not CIO or anything) - for her to go to sleep. She was so miserable and beside herself.

Anyway, still love to hear others advice about the timing of the nap, nap length etc as per my first post. Thanks katemom for your ideas, i might try the earlier nap time again, rather than leaving it to 2pm, and if she naps great, if not then she'll hopefully have a good solid night sleep following and maybe nap another day.

Jessie

[sherry lynn]

I think going to 1:30 is probably a good idea - if she is willing to go to sleep at least some days of the week. That way when you wake her an hour later she isn't quite so tired and grumpy. If she is napping 2 hours with a 2:00 nap time she might be grumpy and a little OT when you wake her.

[louis-mummy]

Hello Ladies

Have just read through the last few pages, i need to try to head off another sleep problem before things gets too bad (again). 

Louis (29 months) has started to refuse his nap some days over the past few weeks, he still will nap at nursery (but he's always more easy going with things there than for me  ) but at home he gets mad when it's mentioned or when we head off upstairs - same with night bedtime too but that's always been an issue.  Sometimes he will eventually go to sleep and need to be woken after an hour but the last 2 days he's been really furious and upset so i've let him back up after 30 mins or so, he seems happy to be up.  I liked the idea back there about having down time but will deffo need to do the explaining that he can read, play etc and doesn't have to go to sleep - he's a busy thing and sitting down anywhere for more than 2 mins doesn't appeal unless the tv is on  i can rarely remember him playing in his bed for more than a few mins at a time.........

current routine is/was

WU 7.30-8am
S 1.30-2.30 (if at all)
S 8.30-9.00

He is only having the odd nw and rarely wakes before 7am (lucky me i know) but he is grouchy and wild in the afternoon when he hasn't napped.  I'm wondering whether to wake him no later than 7.30am and try to keep the nap but cut it to 45 mins - or less?

To date we have struggled with nw's and independant sleeping and although things seem great for us right now (very occasional nw's) we are sliding into unhappily going to bed again - maybe OT?

any thoughts appreciated

[mylittlelovelies]

aaahhh!!
our day started at 3:58am today! earliest start ever

I am definitely going to take sherry lyn's advice and move the nap earlier and accept that some days she will sleep and some not. My guess is she will nap less than fifty percent of the time, but it will be better than todays EW!

Yesterday we had people for dinner so i wanted to be sure we definitely got a nap so put her down at 2pm, asleep by 2.15 and she woke at 4pm. Went to sleep at about 8:30pm (normal bedtime is 8pm so not much later), then she woke at 3:58 wanting to go to the toilet and then that was it, couldn't get back to sleep at all!

is that EW because of the late nap??
if it is then the nap is gotta go!! (or be eariler as prev mentioned)

Jessie

[mylittlelovelies]

also, sorry Laura that you're in the same messy nap boat!! its horrid. Hope you get some good advice.