Support for dropping the last nap age 2-3 yrs

[rinajack]

Right now, my almost 19mo does his nap starting between 1pm and 2:30pm - so a very very long A time in the morning.  He then falls asleep while we watch TV together - but as you can see has to be very tired for that to happen.  He naps for 30-40 minutes which just helps him get to bed time, and then sleeps pretty much through (except for right now, but he is teething eye teeth).

Just telling you in case you want to try something very different.

[skatty]

Clare he does sound like Leorah, she would never sit and relax in front of the TV and drop off, she has to act out what they are doing on the TV, and snuggling with a blanket is a game  Perhaps he really is ready for no nap but I am guessing he needs an extremely early bedtime to avoid OT. Does he sit in the puschair if you go out walking so you can at least keep him still for an hour? We have the same problem with the car seat, she is like Houdini and can get out of any straps 

[clareharley]

Yes, he'll sit in the pushchair for a while but he won't sleep in it. I can only strap him in around the waist because he still has to move about while he's sitting. At least it keeps him relatively still so, yes, it would give me some sort of rest.

[skatty]

I would take him for a long walk then, at least he will sit in the pushchair, my dd hates the pushchair as well  Maybe you could experiment with different dvds too, the first few times my dd saw Winnie the Poo she was mesmerised and then it was the same when she saw Dumbo but she was older than your ds, after 2 years, anything else and she would still be doing other things as well as watching  Is there any chance you can get him to bed for 6, it may help with the NWs.

[clareharley]

Yes, I might try an earlier bedtime and see how it goes. He goes to playgroup on Thurs and Fri afternoons and we don't usually get back until about 6pm so it wouldn't work then, but the rest of the week could be possible. Thanks for your advice.

[Sarahboosmom]

Hi there!  I think I belong here now.  DD is now 30 months and we are struggling with naps.  For most of the winter season we have been couped up indoors and my little spirited DD has not had the chance to get out her energy.  As a result she has just chatted away quietly mind you on her bed for most of the time.  I have found that if I stand in her room she will stay real quiet and fall asleep.  Sometimes it takes 5 minutes other 20 and other times she just can't fall asleep.

I've extended her A time given the low activity levels and here is our routine:

7/7:15 am Wake
1:30/2 - 3:30/4 pm nap
7:30 in bed usually asleep by 7:45

Now it seems that if she does fall asleep for a short nap it is closer to 2:30 or 3 pm and then she doesn't fall asleep until 8:30!!!!

She is not ready to 'drop' the nap because around 5 pm at dinner she is a little wind up toy and fights bedtime and we have dicipline issues.  Also the next day after a no nap day we have nothing but problems and I put her down at 1:30 and lo and behold she'll nap. 

It is still too cold here to go outside and wear her out.  But my fear is even when it does get nice and warm and I can wear her out playing she is so used to not napping that she will still refuse.  I have noticed though that on weekends when we go to Gymboree or the Zoo (on the RARE 55 degree day!) or a bounce house place she will nap like a champ!  So that is my main concern is that it is an energy issue. 

Every day I do put her in her room for the full 2 hours (honestly I NEED a break) and either she'll sleep or have 'quiet' time talking to her animals on her bed. 

So does it look like we are in the no nap transition?  She's always been a super napper and I'm shocked that she's so young to want to give it up.  And the fact that most times if I am in the room she'll sleep almost feels like a training/dicipline issue.  If mommy is away the mouse will play!  At least she stays on her bed which is my rule. 

So I guess what I need to do is on the no nap days should I move her bedtime up from 7:30 to 6:30?  Usually by 6:30 we are in near meltdown and mommy and daddy are DONE!  Basically that would mean she eats, gets a bath and is in bed.  Like I said I still think she needs more than just her night sleep based on her behaivor but I can't MAKE her sleep. 

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I must admit I've helped many on this board but this is one of the rare times I need help!  She's been an angel sleeper up until now!  Oh boy the joys of the independent toddler!
 

[JulieNG]

Saraboosmom,
The exact same thing happened with my daughter. She hasn't napped in her crib since January (when we took paci away) and she will be 3 April 5. She started fighting naps even before then and was only sleeping 3-4 days per week since maybe last August. BUT, even with a few days a week her behavior was 100% better than it is now. These days she will only sleep in the car and I feel she still needs a nap. I still try to do quiet time in her crib, but like I said she has slept 1 or 2 times since January actually in bed. Today for example she woke at 7, in crib from 1:15-2:15 played quietly for a bit, then yelled for me. Then at 3:30 I did an errand and she ASAP fell asleep in car and I couldn't get her up till 5. That is rare cause normally I can wake her, but totally she wouldn't budge.

My question for everyone else: What is an acceptable amount of A time for a soon to be 3 year old? If I tried for a nap at 2-2:30, isn't that too late? Ideally I'd like bedtime no later than 8-8:30. Right now it's 7 with no nap, but it's a struggle from about 3:30 on with a fussy girl.

[NiknLily]

sarahboosmom - yep your definitly in the transition and there isn't really much you can do about it.  Lily isn't spirited but I have found that even plenty of fresh air and excersise doesn't always guarantee that she will nap.  Just keep putting her down for quiet time/nap if she will.  Something you might want to try is put her down earlier for the nap.  I really didn't think it would work but it does with Lily.  Itry to have her down for 12.45, 1pm at the latest, 12.45 works best she is usually asleep by 1pm then.  I let her sleep for 45min/1hr and she is in bed and asleep almost immediatly at 8pm.

At 2.5yr the average sleep req is 12.5hrs so on no nap days I would try to get her to bed 6.30pm tops, that way hopefully she will extend her night sleep to make up for the lost nap sleep.

Julieng - I guess an acceptable A time can be all day when they are dropping nap to that extent.  Personally I don't let Lily sleep past 2pm that way I can get a 8pm bedtime from her, any later and the short night sleep effects her more than skipping her nap.  Have you tried an earlier nap as I suggested to sarahboosmom.

[Sarahboosmom]

Julieng and NiknLily thank you for the replies.  I definately think the naps are on the way out. 

NiknLily, I will take your advice on the earlier nap time.  12:45 is usually when I get home from picking her up from her part time preschool.  Today I put her down at 1:30 and she fought me hard so my hunch is she was way OT from not napping yesterday.  So 6:30 bedtime tonight!  I don't mind the early bedtime at all, I need my time with my husband! 

Luckily she does not mind the quiet time in her room at all.  She is generally very quiet and stays on her bed with no issues.  Occasionally she will chatter a bit too loudly and I go in and remind her to sleep or rest quietly.  She usually just chats to her animals and talks to them for the whole nap time.

What I don't get is that if I stand in the room she will usually go right to sleep.  But lately even that isn't working so that is why I posted here.  I have to admit it just frustrates me to no end that she's not napping.  I know she needs it and I don't like dealing with the OT monster at the end of the day, it makes it hard to enjoy her!  KWIM? 

I wonder too, since I've been working at home she can sleep in until 7 am so with a 10 or 11 hr night that would mean a 6 to 6:30 wake up or a later bedtime, yikes!  I'm not an early riser and with the new baby coming in Sep I need her to sleep a bit longer so I can nurse the baby first thing.  Does it work if you split up the total sleep requirement in an 11 hour night and 1.5 hour nap?  So if she goes to sleep at 7:30 that would mean I would wake her at 6:30 or 8 pm bedtime wake at 7?  Then maybe that will give her the extra room for 1.5 hour nap?  I really miss her good 2-3 hour naps!  She used to sleep 11 hours at night plus 2-3 hours day so I'm totally in shock!  I mean its not overnight this has been going on for months and now its like its almost gone!

Thanks for the help, I'll try the earlier nap and just stay with the quiet time anyway with the early nighttime. 

[Hester]

Earlier naptime did the trick for us as well! And IF no nap, earlier bedtime, otherwise OT hits and we have a laaate bedtime and NW

[musicmumma]

Hi All, this sounds like it might be the place for me "support for dropping the NAP"
My 23 month old DD has started taking ages to go to bed at night and just acting not tired in general at bedtime.
I think she may be getting to much sleep. 
The problem is I need the sleep! I am 8 months pregnant with our second so I want the nap and the 12+ hours at night! BUT I want it all cause I want her to go to sleep easily like she used to instead of getting up and down for 2 hours.
Whinge whinge whinge...
I am pretty sure I know what I need to do cut back the sleep time.
She was getting about 12 hours at night and then 1-2 hours during the day quite often with me waking her up from her nap.
Last night we tried 10.5 hours and .45 for a nap today it is nearly 6 and she is getting really grumpy I am thinking it might be time for bath ect...
Does that seem like enough sleep for her I dont think it is then what time will she wake tomorrow morning?
So many questions am I doing the right thing...

[NiknLily]

sarahboosmom, its ok to split the day/night sleep in whatever arrangement suits you, as long as LO will be ok on whatever split you try.  Lily was always a 12hr night girl, so I know she thrives on a long night.  As such I have always tried to make sure she gets max night sleep, even if it means a shorter nap.

musicmumma - at 23m the average sleep req is 13hrs.  So I'd be aiming for either a 12hr night plus 1hr nap or an 11.5hr night with 1.5hr nap.  The messing about at bedtime is likely to be because she needs longer A time before bed.  So you are right, you do need to tweak her routine but I wouldn't go anywhere near as far as you tried already, its too big a jump.  I think at that age Lily would do 7am wake up, 12.30nap for 1-1.15hrs tops 7pm bedtime.  By 2.5yrs she was doing 7am wake, 1pm nap for 1-1.5hrs bedtime 7.30pm.  The trouble you get at bedtime when they need just a small amount more A time is that they can then play/talk/sing/whine... right past their window and then take ages to get to sleep.  So all though she has been taking upto 2hrs to get to sleep at night it doesn't mean she really needs to go to bed 2hrs later than before.

[Sarahboosmom]

NiknLilly

Thank you for your replies they do help.  I think I'm going to stick with the longer nights and just move that nap up to 12:45 -1 pm and see what I get.  If she falls asleep I'll get her up at 1.5 hours max and the normal 7:30 bed, if no nap then 6:30 bed. 

She's always been both good day and night sleeper but always been consistant in a 11.5 to 12 hour night so I'd much rather keep with that.  Thanks for all your help!

FYI, I put her down at 1:05 pm (I had a conference call until 1 today ugh) and she is napping right now!  Even with the lack of activity today (no school today and I was working so she was playing with babies and blocks) she is napping!  I could tell though as we were getting ready for nap that she was a bit keyed up and starting to act a bit like a wind up toy so that told me I almost missed it.  Thanks for your help!

[Mama2boys]

am listening in as we can't get aour breakup right and nighhts are awfiul righht now.

[rinajack]

GGRRR. DH gave DS some cold meds before his "quiet time" yesterday and he slept for 1.5 hrs (or was it 2)...anyway, result is me up with DS for 2 whole hours during the night.  I am completely shattered.  He can only have a short nap if he naps at all - yes it sucks as we don't get much down time if any, but boy when I am up for a couple of hours during the night it feels totally worth it!