I'm a human snack bar and late night entertainer - PLEASE HELP!

[gabsybaby]

Hi,

I am a new mother of a 3 1/2 week old baby and trying to get to grips with establishing some form of routine (as I have more energy now to do so).

I demand (breast) feed my little boy, from every 20 minutes to every 1 1/2 hours for maybe 5 to 12 minutes max. I cannot get him to eat longer and on the rare occasions when he has eaten longer, not more than 15-18 minutes, he will most likely vomit (a lot). This means that night time is party time and it is an ongoing process of feed, poop, change, feed, poop, change, walk around to calm him, play music, try to put him down, cry, feed, poop, change and so on. Last night this went on from 11.30pm till 4.30am nonstop and I was at my wits end.  What am I doing wrong and how can I change this? I am simply not recognising his needs at all.

I have just started reading "The baby whisperer", but for the moment I really need a quick answer.

Please help,
Gaby

[Jocasta]

First off, Hugs to you!!!

Second, have you ruled out reflux?

http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=654.0

If you are sure this isn't the issue, let us know but it does sound awfully familiar to me - my youngest suffered badly and we turned a massive corner as soon as we found meds that worked for her - in our case Gaviscon. 

If you are sure that reflux isn't an issue, it'd be my guess that you're not necessarily interpreting his cues accurately.  It is true that some breast fed babies do in fact need to eat more regularly (some as often as every 1.5 hrs when very young), but 20 minutes...  Kudos to you for retaining your sanity!  

It is also common for babies to want to feed for ours non-stop in those early weeks.  This is to help establish your supply and although you may feel desperate and frustrated, it really, really doesn't last that long.

There is a section in The Secrets of The Babywhisperer where Tracy highlights body language and how to interpret certan cues and what certain behaviours in small babies actually mean.  My first two I could read like a book but this section got doggeared with my youngest lol - it was so helpful as I found Mae so difficult to understand!  She went from content to severely over tired in 0.3 seconds

It does sound like your nights are probably a routine issue so it may also be worth popping over to the EASY board for some advice as there are some real experts over there.

http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?board=41.0

As for the feeding, please stick with it.  It's so, so worth it.  It's often bloody hard work in those early weeks but it so pays off once everything is established. 

Hugs!

Jo x

[gabsybaby]

Hi Jo,

Thank you for replying to my message.  I had not considered acid reflux, but will look into that as he does show some signs of it, except he is gaining weight thank goodness, but i suppose that is due to the small, frequent meals.

I will check out the E.A.S.Y forum to, in order to get tips on establishing some sort of routine. Really, thank you so much.

Have a great weekend.

Gaby

[deb]

Weight gain does not rule out reflux - this I can say from our own sad experience with Josie. She was "comfort-feeding" - the milk soothed the burn of the reflux - almost constantly and gaining weight to the point that our 50th-percentile baby was up to 80%ile in weight, but she was still projectile-refluxing by 6 weeks. This lasted till 3 months when we finally got a clue AND convinced her doctor to take her screaming seriously AND give her meds. (Zantac was her med.)

A lot of new moms, myself included, have a hard time distinguishing the "feed me" cries from any other cries, so "feeding on demand" for a baby who always *seemed* to be "demanding" means a lot more feeding than actual demanding. If you do have a refluxer, he might want a feed for comfort's sake, making the cues even harder to read. (Again, this I know from hard experience.  ) By all means, cut yourself some slack while we help you sort this out. This new-baby stuff is HARD!

[~*~Louisa~*~]

Do you use a paci? your baby might be wanting to suckle instead of feed If your not sure if its suckle or feed that they want you could give your finger to suck on if they are hungry after a few sucks they will still cry as they are not having there belly filled iykwim

[Jocasta]

I second the weight gain thing - Mae continued to gain well as she never stopped feeding due to reflux.  Within 24 hrs of starting Gaviscon, she was a completely different baby!  Definitely worth exploring further.

Hugs honey.