toddler waking at night

[olivermum]

My son is nearly 3 years old and has always slept well. He doesn't nap during the day anymore and goes to bed at 7pm and usually wakes up between 6-7am. We had another baby in November and my son loves his little sister. We are still able to give him attention and he has never shown any jealousy even when i'm breastfeeding he kisses her. When she was about 5 weeks old he started to come into our bedroom in the middle of the night for no particular reason. He wouldn't cry until he came in our room and has not complained of any nightmares or any excuse to come in to our room. I walk him back to his bed without giving him too much attention and he settles again. This can happen once or up to 5 times a night! He asks for the light to be left on and the door open which we have done. ( He used to sleep with no problems with the door shut and no lights) We have brought a night light for him which we leave on all night and leave the door open. I wondered if he was doing it to see me during the night so my husband tried walking him back to bed but he kept getting up and I ended up having to settle him as my husband got so frustrated with him. I have threatened to shut the door and turn off the light which upsets him. He did sleep through last night and I gave him lots and lots of praise so i'm hoping he will continue to do so. Any suggestions on what to do when he gets up? x x x

[Colin Macs Mom]

Bumping up for you

[Caroline-Charlies Mummy]

To be perfectly honest, I think you are doing all the right things. I would have suggested you do the low-key taking him back to bed, tuck in, quick cuddle and night night. I would also have suggested the night light.

It does sound like he's reacting to his little sister being born, perhaps he just needs the reassurance that Mum is still there for him, maybe he feels more vulnerable at night?

I can only suggest that you are consistent with what you are doing, gently and firmly, and he will be reassured that nothing has changed, Mum and Dad are still there for him, and it should pass.

The only thing I would suggest is to stay away from threats of doors being shut, etc. This will probably only serve to unsettle him, and may well prolong the issue.

[olivermum]

Thank you for your reply. He got up once the next night before I received your message and I walked him back and said quietly that I was shutting the door as he had got up and he amazingly stayed in bed. I waited outside the door expecting him to cry and planned to keep walking him back. The next morning he was very pleased with himself for staying in bed. We both gave him lots of praise and the first thing he says as he comes in the morning is... I stayed in my bed and mummy and daddy very happy with me!!! Fingers crossed things continue. Thanks for your help xxx

[Colin Macs Mom]

Way to go!!

[Cory'stiredmommy]

We had the same problem:

What we did was explain that A) the door needs to stay closed bc baby brother cries in the night and we don't want him to wake you

B) If he wakes, it may be legit .. sometimes (bathroom) - make it uneventful as the others have suggested and right back to sleep

C) I tell my son every night a bedtime... if you wake in the middle of the night "go back to sleep." Now my son, who just turned 3, says it back to me ..."I'll go back to sleep."

D) Make a calendar in his room - every X nights, if you sleep through until 7am (or 6am) you get a sticker for your calendar - at the end of 7 stickers earned, you get a treat. This has worked magic - our son is sleeping past 7am. But to do this, get a digital clock radio and cover the "minute" numbers with a piece of paper, leaving the hour Number showing - teach your son what 6 looks like and what 7 looks like - and make sure he can see it from his bed.  I actually drew a big 6 and a 7 on a piece of paper and taped it to his wall - I point to the numbers each night and say, "If you sleep until 6 - you get one sticker and if you sleep until 7 you get 2 stickers. Once you have 7 stickers, you get a bite of chocolate...

It has gotten to the point that he has woken up during 6am, went pee and asked to go back to bed - so he can sleep until 7 to get 2 stickers. It takes a few nights for them to understand the concept... but ti works great!

Good luck... I think that is all I have:-)