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Offline gabriels mum

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Feeling sad and nervous
« on: March 15, 2009, 10:06:30 am »
Hi fellow mummies

DS is a few days off 11 months and I am returning to work in 1 week.  He will be starting full time nursery on Tuesday.

I needed to write, as I am feeling sooooooooo sad at having to stop the daytime feeds, and I Will miss the special time soooooo much.  DS has never had any bottles or formula, so I am quite nervous that he will take what he needs from me morning and night, as I will be asking nursery to give him a little cows milk in a cup if he will take it?!

We are not that advanced on solids either yet, as he tends to gag and vomit quite a lot on lumps/finger foods.  All in all I am feeling very sad and nervous at how this will all work out!?

To make things worse, his 1 hour settling in visits have not gone well, and he has cried for the duration of the time.

I can't believe how quick the last 11 months have gone, and how much I have enjoyed our bf relationship.  I feel so sad.
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Offline mumto5cuddlebugs

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Re: Feeling sad and nervous
« Reply #1 on: March 15, 2009, 10:33:30 am »
Huge (((((hugs)))))).

Time flies by so quickly doesn't it?
I know how hard it is to make these changes and don't have any advice apart from try not to worry. (sorry,  know much easier said then done)
My little one is 11months next week. I am currently a supply teacher so work an erratic routine. He has a morning bf and a night bf everyday and drinks water throughout the day. He seems to get plenty of bm in those two feeds and i'm sure he gets as much as he needs and those times are really special so try to remember your bf relationship is not over but is just changing.

sorry i have not been much help but wanted to offer hugs.
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Offline mum101

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Re: Feeling sad and nervous
« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2009, 10:56:04 am »
HUGS. I am going back to work part time soon and I'm feeling concerned about Leo's day at day care too. Will he wait for me to get there to get his food intake for the day, will he take cows milk in a cup... He drank cows milk from a cup once, and since then has refused it!  I start back at work in about 2 weeks time.

I hope your LO settles quickly and I'm sure he will value those lovely feeds from you.  It might be a nice comfort for him at the end of his busy new day  :-*
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Offline A pair of Charlies

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Re: Feeling sad and nervous
« Reply #3 on: March 15, 2009, 11:33:23 am »
Huge hugs.  :'(

Lots of Mamas here continue successfully with 2 feeds a day. And as pps said, your beautiful BFg relationship with him isn't over, it is developing just like he is.  ;)  And if 2 feeds a day work for both of you, then continue as long as you're happy! The WHO recommended BF for the first 2 years for the health benefits of babes.

I hope nursery is okay for both of you. I think those special morning and night feeds from you will be superb in giving him closeness and reassurance too.

Wishing you the best of luck and lots of hugs

Charlotte
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Offline Erin (redstarfalling)

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Re: Feeling sad and nervous
« Reply #4 on: March 15, 2009, 20:17:19 pm »
Big hugs from me too.

I remember going through the same worries...he'll settle in at daycare soon - once he's there for longer, it'll be easier for him to get on to the routine.  I know I tried to keep our weekends as close as possible to the routine my kids had during the week.  One of the best things is to be happy and matter-of-fact when you see him - both when you leave him and pick him up.  If he picks up on your upset, it'll just make it harder for him.

With the food - I found my kids ate better when surrounded by their peers, so you might find he's the same way.

As for the BF - well, I continued with just morning and night bf's from 1 year to 2 years old with my second - with an occasional nursing on holidays and weekends during the day too.  It can be done!
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Offline mum101

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Re: Feeling sad and nervous
« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2009, 21:54:03 pm »
oh yeah I should have said that too... most kids settle really well and it definitely pays to be (outwardly!) calm and relaxed with drop offs and pick ups.

Thinking back to Rory, she started just before 1 and after the first day there she decided she was determined to feed herself after watching the other kids in her group, big motivating factor. 

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Offline gabriels mum

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Re: Feeling sad and nervous
« Reply #6 on: March 16, 2009, 13:55:31 pm »
Thank you all so much for your lovely and supportive words - I nearly burst into tears reading them!

I also hadn't thought of it as a change in our bf relationship rather than it ending, so thanks, that's a really good way to look at it!

I really hope he settles quickly, I can't bare the thought of him crying all day.  DS1 settled soo easily, but had started nursery by 7 months, and was bottle fed by then.  You'd think I would have found it easier second time around rather than harder wouldn't you?!

Mumto3cuddlebugs - really pleased to hear it all works out well for you, that is a good motivator!  Mum101, best of luck to you too, I hope it all goes well!!!

Thanks once again - you ladies are the best!
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Offline mum101

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Re: Feeling sad and nervous
« Reply #7 on: March 16, 2009, 23:29:39 pm »
I agree with thinking it would be easier the second time. I keep thinking about Leo and hoping he settles easily, even though he has the same easy going temperament as Rory (in fact probably a little less clingy) but I still worry!

I think in a couple of months time we'll have forgotten all about the worry  :-*
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