A very strange prop that i need help with.

[jellybabe]

My ds is 2.7yrs old and he has developed a liking to physical touch. It use to be tickling his tummy or back, but I can now minimize it to just rubbing his hand or holding it. But I am now sleeptraining, and in the step where I need to move away from his bedside. How do I go about for him not to need this prop to fall asleep. He has such a fixation on tickling, he'll do it to himself in his sleep. Should I encourage him to do it himself to fall asleep?? Or try to distract him instead? I have him a lovey that he never had before as he never really got attached to it. I let him cuddle 'Leo' so that he feels comfort, but I dunno how to go about this prop..

[Shiv52]

I'd probably stay by his bed a few nights more lessening the amount of physical touching I'm doing.  And then once you can sit there without touching him then start to move away.  Just in case he would find no touching and moving away too much to handle at one time?

Giving him something else to cuddle is a great idea too.  Means if he's wanting to hold your hand you could say, 'Awh give 'Leo' a hug. He sleeps with you.' 

[jellybabe]

Hmm, yeh, that might be a good idea. Just gradually stop the physical contact and let him lovies Lovey instead. Thanx for that idea.

[Shiv52]

Hope it works!  My LO had gotten very stuck on ssh pat and found it hard to go to sleep unless we were touching her tummy and we did a similar sort of thing.  First few days were rough as she tried to grab our hands back (amazing how quickly something becomes a prop) but once we gradually reduced the touching then we were able to move further away from the cot.

Good luck! 

[rachel 2009]

Hi my ds is nearly 4. He always likes to have his leg or arm stroked before he falls asleep ( he also shakes his head from side to side to fall asleep). I read him a story and then he always likes hush little baby sang to him before he goes to sleep...I stoke his leg while i sing it and then its a kiss and cuddle before i leave. I find that this is enough and he has learnt that this is the routine and he knows that i wont be sat there all night stroking his leg but i am happy to do it while i sing to him. Then i leave sometimes he might shout me back and i always go in to see what he wants..but i make it clear that its sleep time now if he is persistant i just tell him i am going to do my chores or to the loo but will pop back shortly.... by the time i go back he is fast a sleep... but i always tell him in the morning that i went in and he was sleeping so just gave him a kiss.

I know it can be quite hard..he could be difficult at times when he was younger and he would cry and shout me when i left the room especially if he was OT but i always did the same. Now he is great at bedtimes and doesn't need me there...which is more than can be said for my 10 month old.

[jellybabe]

Hi rachel. I've actually finally broken that prop. Still working on the waking up. Its been 2 weeks and it feels as if he's never gonna sleep better! He wakes about 2 or 3x a nite. But luckly its not coz he wants to be stroked or for any physical contact. He'll just get up, come to my bed and he'll even know that I am taking him back to bed coz he 'leads' the way to his room. Gets in bed and will just turn over and sleep again. I can almost do that with just walk in/walk out coz he doesnt even look to see if i stay there. I am almost at his bedroom door with the GW method, and getting very nervous on the wi/wo method. He does NOT like to be left alone. Its so hard with having a younger child, coz she is 11mths and sleeps pretty good. I am always worried that he wakes her up when he calls/cries for me if I leave. Just have to stick to my guns I guess.

[rachel 2009]

I know exactly how you feel.... i rush into the baby in the night in case he wakes up ds1...and if ds1 wakes in the night as sometimes he does i rush into him so he doesn't wake the baby lol..... i am sure that they would probably go back to sleep if i left them but dare not risk it.... its so reasuring for them to have mummy close by... but it is hard to leave them especially when they are upset.. i must admit i found it easier with my first but i can't do it with my second..must have got soft somewhere along the way.... I have even slept in ds1 bed before when he has had a nightmare or been poorly.... I hope he gets better but at least he goes straight back off to sleep when he goes back in his bed..you must be knackered tho..its a killer having to get up in the night...i can't remember the last time i didn't feel tired

[jellybabe]

lol Yeh rachel. Havent caught up on the 24 lost hours sleep since ds was born lol!!! I find dd easier than ds which is my eldest. She goes down without needing assistance, and likes to sleep. Ds was hard and wouldnt nap by himself till he was 6mths old, and after that not by himself, had to wait till he's fast asleep or he'll wake. I know dd cant sleep with us forever so sooner or later i'll have to move her lol but am waiting till she sleeps through coz she's not a good eater. I had surgery on my hand and doesnt help at the minute as I am even more out of it due to the anethesia I had lol. Kids, what can you do....