Thank you for your prayers.
Since she lived far away, I never got to see her too often. We would see her every few years as kids when my grandparents were still alive, but after they passed away in 95/96, Granny had no reason to visit anymore, plus she was getting too old to fly. So I don't think I saw her between then and last year, and she had no idea who we were. I know my mom had often said she was a bit of a harsh woman, but I'll always have fond, sweet memories of her.
I hope you get a chance to talk to DH this week Alyssa. I know it's so hard to talk about these sorts of things, but I've really learned over the years that it's important to speak from the heart. Best address the issue before it becomes a bigger problem 0 avoided issues only harbour resentment if left to fester. But some things I've learned over the years (mostly from watching my parents
) is that there is a right and a wrong way to go about these things. You want to approach the situation from an objective point of view, not a hurt or angry one. It's important to be fair when addressing serious relationship issues, be firm with how you feel but also take responsibility for the things you might not see that your DH does. After all, raw emotions like anger and resentment are counterproductive, as is pointing fingers. I like to approach things with the mentality 'what needs to be done to make this situation better?' rather than 'these are the things you've done wrong and this is why I'm angry' (this second approach is always the one I took in the past, and it's how my mom and my brother think - they can't ever let go of past actions and refuse to move forward). I like to think of it this way - I tell you one thing that bothers me, we talk about it, you tell me one thing that bothers you, we talk about it, etc. Hopefully he doesn't get defensive, or you too, because that's why people start to butt heads. Actually, my DH has taught me to think like this. He is very reasonable, and almost never lets his emotions get the better of him, gets angry or stays angry. He is the one who made me a better person.
I guess the way I see it is, what has happened is history, so it's important to look to the future to be happy. I hope everything goes well, and of course we're always here to help.
