I need to vent about nursery and naps!

[skatty]

Leorah goes to nursery 5 days a week and up until 2 weeks ago has slept in a pram, we had loads of hiccups but finally they seemed to get that she needed to go down earlier than other kids her age and she started sleeping virtually everyday from 40 mins to 1hr15. Leorah now goes down in a room on a mattress with other children, there are a lot of younger ones that have started and they get put down first and then Leorah and the other indoor kids go, she is one of the first but then lies there  while other kids are coming in, she is very spirited and I imagine this is very OS. In 2 weeks Leorah has had one 40 minute nap after someone stroked her cheek until she slept and a 10 minute nap yesterday. Every night at around 5pm she is screaming so much we have to get her pyjamas on and get her in the cot where she cries herself to sleep, no dinner, no stories, no bath, it is horrible. Anyway my DH tried speaking with them when he picked her up today and they said someone sat with her for 90 minutes and she did not sleep and was not tired, doesn't even yawn and that it isn't the room she just doesn't want to sleep! I just want to scream, she has dark circles around her eyes, is having NWs and EWs. When at home she still naps fine, I wish she was just giving the nap up but this isn't the case. My opinion is that she isn't getting the space she used to get by being on her own in a pram, I am so frustrated because this affecting our lives! Tomorrow DH drops her off and will speak to the social worker there because this is not working for us and they can't just decide she is not tired because she doesn't yawn! I am so worried they will be inflexible on this, I have already told DH we will have to talk to the leader of the whole organisation if they don't agree to help us. What is really bad is that because I don't speak good enough danish I can't fight our corner and have to leave it to DH and then I bark questions at him and get snappy if he hasn't said the right things  I am wondering if she'd even sleep in a pram there now, it has been so long since she regularly napped at nursery I am worried she wont ever do it again. Sorry I don't know what advice you can give but I needed an outlet before I burst 

[clazzat]

(((hugs))) Katt.  I'm afraid I don't have any advice, but I couldn't read and not send you hugs.  Hope you manage to get some answers from them tomorrow.
Cx

[Mashi]

Have to send huge hugs.   On one hand it is nice to hear that they are trying in SOME ways - like stroking her cheek, sitting with her for 90 minutes...at least they aren't just leaving her to be.  So with that kind of attitude from them it really may be that they will be adaptable to what you want them to try.  Maybe they could do something with her like try to wind her down before the nap room, just take her aside and have a cuddle, let all of the other kids get in the room first, and then she can tiptoe in quietly and lie down? 

Huge hugs and lots of fingers crossed that it all works out.

[skatty]

Thank you girls, it was just nice to vent and I feel better now! DH is going to tell them tomorrow that we would prefer she went down in a pram again because even if she doesn't sleep she seems more rested. DH's mum has an old pram that we can take there so it isn't really putting them out, he is also going to ask that she gets to keep her hat because at home she covers her face with her hat and goes to sleep. Mashimaro unfortunately Leorah is very curious and easily stimulated and would not be one for having a quiet cuddle, she would be walking around getting more OT, thing is before she goes down they are really busy putting other kids outside. She loved it when she first went to the room because she is really interested in beds and sleeping but it is almost a game to her, when they tell her to sleep she snores and giggles. I have instructed DH what to say tomorrow lol, he is going to talk to the leader there and say when would be a good time this morning for me to be able to talk to you so we at least get listened to, I mean I am sure they would prefer not to spend 90 mins trying to get her to sleep, this probably OS her more but the thing is we said if she doesn't fall asleep she will sometimes drop off if we hold her hand and tell her to shut her eyes, obviously doesn't work there! We are in a bit of a vicious circle now because L is so tired even if she is down by 12.30 for her nap it is too late, hopefully if we get her rested over the weekned and she sleeps in apram next week we can get back on track. Oh I hate it when I can't control her routine 

Thank you girls for listening 

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

{{{hugs}}} I hear you about not being able to control their routine! I hope they listen and help come up with a way to help her get the sleep she obviously needs! Masyn stopped napping at daycare a long time ago, but she was gearing up for no naps and only missed one nap a week.  I hope it works out and she can get back on track.

Heidi

[clh]

Had to send {{hugs}} Kat.     Waiting to hear how the meeting goes/went.  (I'm bad at the time zone thing.)

[skatty]

Thank you girls, Leorah had a great night, asleep by 5.45pm a brief waking at 10.30pm and then slept through until I woke her after 7am. DH is going in today and saying "If Leorah doesn't sleep today she will stay home tomorrow and I will bring a pram on Monday because I hate getting home to find her screaming and crying herself to sleep and the only time I see her nowadays is when she wakes in the night!" I didn't even need to coach him

Thank you all, it is so good to have people who understand los and sleep and realise that not yawning and evil giggling do not mean thay are fresh 

[Vicku]

Hi sweetie,
just sent you a pm but had to post after reading this.
Is the reason why they put her in the room on the mat that new younger ones have started? I hope they will accept her sleeping in your spare pram. It is a bit change to the routine to all of a sudden sleep in a different room and as L has just gotten used to sleeping there in a pram it might be too much for her. She likes her routine as we know
I hope you and the teachers can find a solution that works and that they are open to listening and adjusting to her needs. I know at Lois' nursery they do their best to get her to sleep, but they wouldn't be flexible on the time as they all go lie down at the same time on separate mattresses, give them about 30 mins to fall asleep and then that's it. I really hope Lois sleeps there today as it's her firstday back for two weeks after being ill.
Can't wait to hear how it went when M spoke to them this morning. Good i hope! It must be so awful to see her so tired in the evenings and not having any nice time together either
Sleepy nap vibes for Leorah ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Love and hugs for you
And some hugs for M too, bet he could do with some too.

[skatty]

Hello, Martin went to the nursery today and they told him again Leorah doesn't look tired and they don't think it is because of the room! Martin then said believe me she is tired and we are sick of the rush of having to get her to bed just after 5pm and deal with NWs, he said the woman looked quite shocked at that! I just can't believe that they cannot see the connection of Leorah going into that room and not napping  Well if she doesn't sleep today then we know it's the room as she has had a very good night sleep and was very happy and fresh this morning, Martin also asked them to let her keep her hat for her nap because at home when she is ready to sleep she puts it over her face, this could really work as I think she needs to block everything out. Fingers crossed she sleeps today because we really would prefer she slept on a mattress indoors because when she starts kindergarten n October this is the only option!

Thank you for the hugs Vick, I know you are having your own nap issues too and I hope they both nap today 

[Vicku]

Thanks for the update. Why do so many people think a baby/toddler can't need sleep if they don't 'look' tired? She is spirited for god's sake! By the time Lois looks tired she's really beyond tired... always has been that way really.
Yes, lets hope they both nap today!

[Mashi]

Fingers are crossed for you and sending sleepy vibes to Leorah!

[skatty]

She napped, she napped, she napped - she napped - she napped to be read in a sing song voice while imagining me dancing  The workers at the nursery tried to say they don't think it was the hat and that she kept taking it on and off and I said "yes and then she puts it over her face and falls asleep?" and they begrudgingly said yes, haha! We have had a most pleasant evening of singing and then stories, Leorah helped get undressed and put her nightie on, I got a kiss and daddy is stuck in her room but he may just be taking precautions against a bad end to the evening! I can't describe how ecstatic I am to get my happy girl back, lets hope she can continue now she has proved she can sleep on the mattress.

Thank you girlies for letting me moan 

[Mashi]

OHHHHHHHHHH I am doing a happy dance with you!  I know the feeling of a spirited baby who needs to nap and how much of a relief it is that it worked! Really happy for you and happy for Leorah that she's rested now!

[clazzat]

Sooo pleased for you - isn't it amazing what a little sleep can do!  Hope she continues to nap well and that you have your happy girl back.
Cx

[shivi]

so happy to hear Katt

have had a horribly awful evening with a totaly OTd Oscar so totally know where you're coming from!!!

S x