Why does my LO cry during his feeds?

[~Jen~]

Hello.. I was hoping for some advice.  My DS is 19wks and his behaviour during BF'ing has changed dramatically in the past few weeks.  I'm finding it really distressing but maybe I'm just reading his cues wrong.  We are on 4 hour EASY and so I only feed him 4x a day (7,11,3 and 7, he gets a bottle of EBM for DF at 11).  As the day goes on, with each feed, he gets increasingly fussy and impatient at feeds.  For the last two feeds of the day, he ends up crying after feeding 5 mins on each side.  He will latch on, feed 5 mins, come off but look to go right back on. So he goes back on, sucks for a few seconds and then pulls off, cries.  I'll offer him the other side, he'll settle for 5 mins and we go back to same pattern as other side with on/off and cries.  I'll offer both sides again but he won't really feed anymore (maybe a few sucks) and just keeps crying.  Is he trying to tell me he is finished feeding?  I'm not sure because he keeps trying to latch back on.  But then when I offer him my boob, he sucks for a few seconds and he just comes off and cries.  I'm so confused and find it so upsetting when I try and feed him.  I used to love our time BF'ing but now it is just so stressful when he cries!

[Shiv52]

Sorry to hear you are having a rough time xx

Is there any chance your LO could have thrush?  My LO had it about this age and it was a nightmare.  She ate first thing in the morning as she was hungry after not eating all night but as day went on she only took a little (I assume to stave her hunger) but then stopped and cried.  Used to latch back on but I think it was too sore to keep on feeding.

[Shiv52]

Just thinking at this time my LO's feeds also went from 30 minute session to 10 minutes.  At this age LO can be much more efficient feeders and can get all they need in a short space of time.  Have you notice length of feeds decreasing the last few weeks??

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

How is your pumping going?  Any trouble getting the same amount of milk out as you usually do?  Is he still having lots of wet and dirty, diapers and is he gaining weight well?  Does he sleep well overnight? 

If all that's okay, I'd wonder at things like thrush or maybe teeth. Another possibility would be that if he's not napping well, could he getting overtired as the day goes on?

[EloysH]

is he unsettled with getting to sleep also? I ask that because refulx can present itself at this late stage, one sign is uncomfortable during feeding because their throat is burning with acid, they can actually reject the boob vecuase they associate feeding with pain, but you would expcet him to have trouble settleing for sleep, especially laying flat on his back.


Also, another thing, my LO used to cry and and off the boob when he was tired, he would be too tired to feed, and sometimes I just read his cues wrong and would offer a feed after 2 to 2.5 hours.. really he just wanted to nap.

[~Jen~]

Thanks for all the replies!

EloysH - He is actually doing really well with sleeping. He goes down very easily for both naps and bedtime with little help from us to go to sleep. I thought it could be reflux but he doesn't seem to have any other symptoms and is very comfortable when laying on his back.  I do suspect being tired might have something do with it when he is fussy during his bedtime feed but the other feeds during the day all happen right after a nap (typically good 2 hr nap)

Erin - pumping is going fine, I pump both sides in the AM and get 8oz consistently.  He is still having wet and dirty diapers and is gaining weight.  His weight gain is steady (slow... but steady).  I also think it could be teeth.. he is definitely teething and when he comes off my boob he often wants to suck on his fingers immediately.  Maybe he is uncomfortable during feeding?  He naps really well usually 2 hrs in both AM and PM so I don't think he would be too tired although maybe before bedtime feeding as it is the end of the day and he has just had enough.  I fed him right after his catnap yesterday and he had a much better feed and didn't seem so frustrated so maybe it is related to being tired. 

Shiv - I think you are totally right about getting more efficient.  I've noticed his feeds have been getting much faster. Part of that is b/c he comes off and does the cry/fuss thing but maybe he is just saying - hey, i'm done now.  He used to be 30mins a session but now we are averaging 10/15mins so maybe is just getting quicker and the crying is b/c he is done and wants to move on.  I didn't think about thrush.  What should I look for? He takes his DF bottle at night without any problems and tries to guzzle the entire bottle from DH.

this has been really helpful.  I think this might be a combination of getting tired at end of day, a bit of teething and being a much quicker and efficient feeder.  I;ll keep an eye on his weight and make sure no dips.  Otherwise, I'll try not to stress too much.  Thank you!!

[Shiv52]

Thrush usually shows with white spots in the baby's mouth.  Have you tried letting him feed for 10 minutes and stopping feeding him when he starts to fuss and see how he goes??

Have you given any teething meds before feeds to see if that helps?

[~Jen~]

I checked and no white spots in his mouth so I don't think it is thrush.  I tried stopping the feed once he started fussing yesterday and he was ok initially.  But then he was hungry much earlier for his next feed.  He usually can go 4hrs b/w feeds without a problem but he was definitely hungry early for that next feed.  But maybe it was because I didn't offer him the other side before we finished.  He'll usually take the other side and then get fussy on that side after 5 mins/10mins. I'll try doing both sides today and then stopping and see how it goes. 

I've tried some teething meds a few times for his bedtime feed but I don't think I gave it to him early enough.  Didn't really make a differnce.  How early do you usually give meds before feeds? Is it also ok to give the meds to them during the day before feeds? 

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

I would give meds regularly when I thought it was teething.  So Tylenol every 4-6 hrs or after 6 months, motrin every 6-8 hrs.

[mum6791]

My lo gets fussy during feeds when he is gassy.  Maybe if he is taking in more air since he is eating faster - have you tried burping once he gets fussy?  I find a dummy really helps calm him while trying to get the burps out.  Just another thought...

[Shiv52]

Thank goodness no thrush then!

Prob a combination of teething and being more efficient feeder and being more alert.  Where are you feeding your LO?

In the first few months I loved that I was able to feed while watching tv or reading a mag but I did find at the 4-5 month mark she started to be VERY distracted by any thing else going on while feeding.  Seems like your LO is hungry especially if he got hungry earlier before his next feed.  Have you tried feeding somewhere quieter?

Just throwing out suggestions.  With teething I generally only used the teething gel unless she was really fussy.  I put it on about 20 minutes before a feed and it seemed to help.