given up paci but spiralling downwards on sleep - guidance needed

[Mama2boys]

Hello all,

A lot of you know of our continued struggles with DS and sleep.

Well finally it got a lot better and he was becoming flexible enough for us to actually start doing things and have an occasional late evening with him and then we gave up the pacifier lats week and its been hell since then.

his good routine was
7ish wake-up
12-1:30 nap
8ish sleep

this was working like a charm

Now after having given up the pacifier last Friday the issues we are facing are
1. Taking atleast 1 hr to fall asleep for the night - this inlcudes endless singinmg and chatter and then a lot of sucking of his lovey before he falls asleep
2. Insisting on me holding his hand/standing by his bed till he falls asleep - major tears if not maybe its to replace the pacifier comfort?
3. EW - am guessing its because he is heading towards OT
4. naps he falls asleep quicker maybe 15 minutes instead of the older 5

So not sure how to start resolving this issue. If I let him sleep as long as he likes in the afternoon to make up for his lost sleep, the night becomes later still as he normally needs 6hrs at least between nap and bedtime. On days we have a catnap (if we are out and about) this can be 5 hrs but no lesser,
Also have tried putting him in bed as early as 7:15 and he still would not fall asleep till 8:30/9, he throws a fit if I even talk about sleep any eralier than 7:30 and insists he needs to play/wants to play.

so current scheudle looks like
wake up - 5:30-6:30, sometimes I can cuddle with him and prolong his sleep to prevent OT but not always
nap 12/12:30 - 1:30/2
sleep 8:30-9

would love some guidance so I can stop this downard spiral we are hedaing towards. We really worked hard at his sleep and now I am almost regretting having given up the pacifier

many thanks

[speechie]

Hi Mukta-
I'm wondering if it's just a learning curve going on...he's having to relearn how to settle himself without the paci- it may take a while for him to figure out how to soothe himself to sleep. When you think of it- taking a paci away at 2.5 years is a lot different then at 9 mos...their memory is longer, the sucking habit is more entrenched.
He may just switch to sucking on lovey for comfort- that's what Nick does. And if I remember correctly, it's a muslin- so easy to clean, replace, etc..?
FWIW, the EWs may not be OT, may just be him not knowing how to get back to sleep easily without his paci- everyone has a lighter sleep phase/waking right at about that point, and if you are all comfy (have your lovey, environment has not changed etc.) you usually roll over and go right back to sleep. But for him, his habit is changing so he may just be up for a while.
I truly think it will improve with time. He may need extra assurance at bedtime, but it should get better in the next week or so.
Hugs.

[Mama2boys]

Thanks Cathie, you are spot on about his Muslin.

ok will try and bear this out for the next few days and see.

Do you think I should allow for a longer nap say maybe 2 hrs instead of 1.5 to compensate for an EW, today he almost fell aslepe with his nose in his pasta!

[speechie]

Yes- longer nap/earlier nap may help curb the OT monster for a few days.
FWIW, we've got EWs and shortened naps here at the moment...always a battle with spirited kids and their sleep!

[Mama2boys]

you can say that again.

Was up at 5:30, and only wanted to go back to sleep on his floor cushions withe me of course, fell aslepe at 6:30 and then move dhim back to his bed -slept till 7:15....ah life!

[speechie]

yours went back to sleep??? Lucky lady!
Nick was:
wake: 5:40AM
nap:12-1 !!!!!!!!!!!!
bedtime??? dear lord, please let him sleep by 7PM!!
LOL fingers crossed for us both for a good weekend!

[Mama2boys]

actually we might try a slightly later bed time since he did have a 1.5hr nap, i am thinking he needs more A time before night sleep.....so might hit for an 8in bed routine and see if it goes better. Its contrary to BW but he needs lesser sleep so might work..maybe
In the afternoons he says when he is sleepy so maybe he needs to do the same in the pm....

[speechie]

it works for us at times---somedays he just goes and goes, and Mama's tired, but he's not!
Fingers crossed it works.