I think we may need tweaking, suggestions please!

[jrmommyx2]

Well, bedtime was 6:30 tonight. I hadn't read your post yet, but the wheels were on there way to falling off the wagon! Neither of them are ready to go 6 hrs yet. 5, maybe 5.5 seems to be our max! And if he is OT he may or may not have NW's but will wake at the same time or even a little earlier and then he's OT the next day too!

As for DD, she actually woke up a few minutes after DS today- And since she is actually been sleeping fine, with that short nap, she really lost it tonight! I really haven't necessarily been putting DD to bed at the same time. She has been just riding along through all of this! The last few days she has been really tired (she is teething)- so she has been going to bed early too, but other than this week, she has been going down at normal time and he has been going down earlier. She  really isn't the issue. She will usually do a 2-3 hr nap no problem!

Ok, for my sanity I would like to have them on the same schedule... but tomorrow I'll try 11 for him and keep her at noon unless she is ultra tired for some reason (like today, she went down at the same time as him). But what do I do if he only sleeps 1.5 hrs again? That means he'll be up at 12:30!!! He'll never make it to even 6pm!!!!!

Things were so good there for a while... What causes the magic time to change?? It feels so strange for me to be having such issues with sleep. I guess it is payback for my kiddies being such good sleepers their first year!

Had to hop back on this am. They both slept from 6:30 last night until.... maybe 7:30ish this am. I'm not sure exactly, but I didn't hear either of them until 7:45! Should I still try the 11 am nap for DS? DD seems to be rubbing her eyes a bit this am. I'm wondering if she was actually up earlier and dozed off again. Do you think I should put her down at normal noon time or earlier too?

[becky1969]

Hmmm. I'd watch those sleepy signs, but this may be your big break! LOL!

If they woke up at 7:30, then I'd probably try for a noon nap.  That 4.5 hours A time and when my son is having issues, that usually is short enough to set him right again.  However, if you see sleepy signs earlier then by all means do earlier.  But, if we can get him to make it to noon then a 1.5 hour nap will at least get you to 1:30.  And maybe, just maybe, we'll beat this OT monster and get him sleeping 2 hours again!

Now there's always the possibility that here is where your DS starts diverging from DD.  Since they aren't identical twins, it only stands to reason that they have different sleep needs.  1.5 hour nap for many toddlers this age is perfectly normal and natural.  So, there may come a point where you simply decide this is who he is and stop worrying about it.  However, if he seems out of sorts and just not himself then you know he does need that extra sleep but is having trouble getting it.  Only you as the mom can tell.  But I'm asking you to look at the situation with new eyes and decide whether your DS is just growing into his personality, and 1.5 hour naps is just part of that package.  It does seem AWFUL lucky for you to have 2 AWESOME sleepers like this! I wonder -- is it possible that he's woken earlier before but you just haven't heard him? In other words, maybe he's ALWAYS slept less than DD but just was quiet when he woke? My son is so very very quiet when he wakes.  IT wasn't until he had a BBB and we started putting books next to him to read that we could tell he was awake -- we could hear the pages turning! LOL! In fact, he's been awake for 30 min this morning but the only way I know is because I heard 2 rustlings and one word.  That's it for 30 min!  But he's def. awake.  Anyway, just some things to think about -- we don't want to drive you nuts trying to fix something that ain't broken.  But I trust your instincts -- if you think he truly needs more sleep, then we'll keep trying to get it!    I know lots of moms would have given up on my son's sleep needs at times when he went over bumps, but I knew my boy and here we are at almost 4 with 2-3 hour naps and 12 hour nights.  Tweaking got us here. 

[jrmommyx2]

You have so much wisdom, I love it! I don't mean to pry but where did you get all this good stuff from??

Yes, I have thought about their needs taking different paths- But I can honestly say this boy is tired!!! If he does less than 2 hours he seems to be miserable upon waking. Then he manages to pull it together, gets a second wind, but then loses it before bed time. He wasn't doing this before, only since the shorter naps started...

I have been really lucky in the fact that their schedules have been so similar. With that being said, DD has always taken about a 15 min- 1/2 hour longer nap than DS! They also have pretty much gone to bed at the same time and woken up around the same time too. I've counted my lucky stars more than once for this!

So today, I was thinking going back to noon- But the tired signs were rolling in like crazy... So I put them down at 11:30. It's 1:10 right now... keep your fingers crossed!!!

Thought I would just add the update to yesterday's post! I slept for 2 hours (up at 1:30) so again, improvement, it was a stretch to bedtime.  He did ok until a little before 6. I was going to put him down at 6:30 again, but then he got a second wind so I though I would try closer to 7. He was in bed a few minutes before 7, and I think asleep right away! He did have one NW around 9pm, but that was it. I didn't hear him until a little before 8am (but i do think he was up earlier.) I think I"ll shoot for noon again today, but watch his signs. DD on the other hand, who also went down at 11:30... I woke her at 2:30 and she too went to bed around 7 (a little later than her brother though)! We'll see what happens today! 2 hrs is great, I just thing it needs to be a tad later in the day now...

[jrmommyx2]

update:

first off in my last post I meant he slept, not I slept! hahaha!! Anyway, yesterday was pretty good! They were both up between 7:30-8am (more normal for us!) I put them down a few minutes before noon. He slept until 2:10, she slept until 2:45! I put him to bed at 6:45, he didn't fall apart, but I could tell he was ready. She was actually ready a little after 7. I was surprised, thought she would have lasted a little longer. Oh well! This is the odd part, he seemed to have gone right to sleep, but then around 7:45 he started crying like crazy! I thought maybe ha had launched his lovey, so I went in. He still had it but was standing up screaming I gave him a hug, he laid back down, but the minute I left the room he started to scream again. He cried for about 10 minutes and then feel asleep. I didn't hear him at all this am- I figured I would let him sleep since he went to bed a little later. I went in at 8, he was standing up (had pooped) so I'm not sure what time he actually woke.  They both went down for a nap at noon again today. He protested a little, but again, I could tell he was tired. I'm keeping my fingers crossed again for at least 2 hours... I think we're moving in the right direction

I should probably stop being so sleep obsessed! In thinking about it- I can't figure out what exactly I am doing that is really any different then before. We have been doing a noon nap for a while now. The only thing I can think of is that for a stint there, they started to wake up earlier, but I was still doing the noon nap and a 7pm bedtime. Maybe they (well, I say they but really it has only been him) really weren't ready for 5 hrs pre and post nap and it all finally caught up with him. Do you think I should focus more now on 4.5 hr A time, 5 at the max, but not for both A times during the day?

[becky1969]

It's really hard to say.  DS was fighting teeth and illness right? That may have been enough to get him in an OT cycle that was hard to break.  The sleepy kids just have a tough time getting back out of those OT cycles!

I think I'd keep the A time on the lower end for a bit and see what happens.  If he has trouble falling asleep then you know it's time to increase As.

[jrmommyx2]

Just wanted to give you an update. Things finally seem back to "normal" for us! DS has done a 2 hr nap for the past few days now!!!! DD is still doing her normal 2.5-3 hrs, so things are good! They are both getting up between
7:30-8am, nap at noon and bedtime is 7 or even a few minutes before for DS. He had that one night of crying after being quiet for 45 min. I actually think something woke him as opposed to him taking a long time to nod off.

It was a rough stretch there but I think we've turned the corner... for now! They just turned 20 months, I can't believe it! Thanks for all of your help and support again Let's hope things stay put for a while now!

[becky1969]

Yay!!!!  So glad things are righting themselves! If it helps you any, 18 months is a bugger for almost every child.  Now that you've gotten over this hump you should have smooth sailing until about 26-27 months when you'll probably see them hankering for a change in routine again.  Can you imagine going 6 months without change?!?!?    That was the best part of 1 nap land for me!

And also thank you so much for your kind words about my wisdom.    I have a touchy child that also had reflux and food allergies as a baby.  That means I became sleep OBSESSED! LOL! I have chronic migraines so when I don't sleep I get awful h/a's.  I'm just so glad this website gives me a chance to pass on my obsession to others. LOL! It makes all those sleepless nights worth it to know that something I learned from my experience helps someone else get a little shut eye.

Hope you have a smooth 6 months!