Middle of Night - Won't Go Back to Sleep

[Mom to M&M]

Hi everyone! DS (just over 4 months) is a pretty good sleeper. He puts himself to sleep in his crib usually between 7:15-7:45 pm. Sometimes will stir around 11-12 but usually just needs a quick side rub (he's a side sleeper) and doesn't fully wake (we don't DF). Then lately he wakes once around 3-4am. This morning it was 3:50. Rubbing his back, etc won't calm him down so I usually give him a diluted bottle at this time, change him and put him back in crib. BUT if he's already slept 8 hours or more, I can't get him back to sleep. He'll try for a while, grunting, moaning, talking, fussing and I try a few times to settle him. But he gets more upset. As I don't want him to wake DD (he sleeps in a loft area for now right outside her room), I often then get him and put him in the swing downstairs (still dark) where he will still take a bit but eventually fall asleep (at which point I turn swing off if I remember) until up for day.

Couple questions:

1. Is the swing a bad habit to get into early morning like this? If so, what else should I do?
2. Instead of feeding him at that 3-4 am time should I just try transferring him to the swing first? Maybe he will wake up less that way and maybe the swing is less of a hard prop to break than a middle of night feeding?

He doesn't suck his thumb or pacifier and he does have a muslin and a small teddy he sleeps with...

TIA!

[brenda2]

is he on a 4 hour routine?  he may need a tweak and need less day sleep at this point.  if he is just awake and happy in the middle of the night it may be that he is getting not enough awake time during the day so making up for it at night.

post your routine...

i would avoid the swing for sleeping at night.  he needs to get into the habit of sleeping a full night in his bed.  i would try shh pat in his bed and not pick him up at all as they can get into the habit of waking for cuddles too

also, at 4 mo it is reasonable that he still needs a night feed and could be hungry in which case i would offer the bottle.

[Mom to M&M]

Hi Brenda. Yes, 4 hour routine for most part. His routine is very flexible/dependent upon DD's activities/needs. He is always awake about two hours though, give or take, during the day and never sleeps more than 4-4.5 hours total during day, sometimes less (yesterday only about 3.25 hours naps total). He HATES shush pat but tends to respond well to having his side/legs rubbed in crib (he's a side sleeper). But last night from his feed at 3:50 (diluted feed) on he seemed wide awake - hence why I finally put him in the swing at 4:50. Tonight if it happens will do a less diluted/more full feed and keep trying to rub his side/back - just hesitant to let him get too worked up/loud as I don't want him to wake his big sister - who hasn't been sleeping well lately either!

[brenda2]

i know it's tough to let them be loud and fuss/cry a bit with a second one in the house...luckily my older one will sleep through anything.

just wonder about the A times if he is awake and HAPPY during the night.  maybe increase A time a bit if he is taking good naps and see?  try 2 hours 10 min and see if he still does a long nap.  this may help a bit.

rubbing his back if he is crying rather than shh pat is the right thing to do if this is what calms him down.  my dd2 is a side sleeper to and likes her back patted while on her side so she can suck her thumb.  but if he is just lying there awake and not crying i would just leave him be in his crib.  sounds like you are in a small place and no alternative to getting him further away from dd's room?

[Mom to M&M]

Thanks again. No alternative for now - we are renting a townhouse and his "room" is really an open loft like area literally right outside her bedroom. We are in the process of buying a house and if it goes through he'll have his own room (albeit it pretty close to hers) before end of the year.

His A times are a bit dependent upon picking up/dropping DD at school, etc (sometimes he falls asleep on way to/from these trips) but I've been trying to extend them a bit.

I wish he would suck his thumb! DD was a thumb sucker and it really made sleep easier.

[brenda2]

yes daycare runs have made  dd2s routine a bit of a mess too, but luckily it can be more flexible than school.  now that dd2 is awake longer it is making it easier to get there and back without her getting OT.  she will not fall asleep in the car, i wish she would!