Author Topic: Please will you review my gradual withdrawal plan? any new/old eyes on this? (Read 4432 times)

franchick · « **Reply #30 on:** November 06, 2009, 14:40:08 pm »

Just wanted to say I have read your thread through and really, truly, you have made amazing progress! I think you will notice significant improvement over the next week or so, I really do. Keep it up - you're doing so well!! And you will be glad you have done it once it all 'works' 100% of the time

(of course, you could do what I did and chickened out and only recently has our 4.5 yr old kicked us out of her bedroom to 'let' her get to sleep - lol! - only joking, please don't do this, especially as you have another on the way)

(((hugs))) xxx

Roseii · « **Reply #31 on:** November 06, 2009, 15:50:34 pm »

Ah thanks so much Franchick, it's really good to get reassurance that I am getting somewhere! 2 weeks ago I could definitely see myself with a 4yo still sharing my bed!! But I can see the light now

Thanks for the support. x

franchick · « **Reply #32 on:** November 06, 2009, 16:06:56 pm »

No worries - hope tonight goes well!

Roseii · « **Reply #33 on:** November 07, 2009, 07:30:36 am »

Hey, hope everyone is ok

Just wanted to say night 7 has probably been the best so far! Had a bit of a strange start in that she took agggges to go to sleep, she barely cried and was actually lying down very still, but she just wasn't closing her eyes! The good thing was I lay far enough away that she couldn't touch me and she didn't object at all, after about half an hour I was starting to get really uncomfy so was debating whether to move or not, I didn't want to disturb her, in the end I did sit up, still next to her cot, and she didn't move a muscle. It was so weird, she was breathing like she was asleep but her eyes were still wide open

...! Anyway she wasn't even looking at me, I got closer to the end of the mattress and just sneaked out of her room! I was expecting tears at any point as I walked down the stairs but nothing! Got downstairs just after 9pm and I am pretty sure she was asleep very soon after that.
She then woke at midnight but I walked in, pointed out her dummy and she lay back down and was flat out, it took a matter of seconds. THEN...she slept til 6.30am!! 6 and a half hours!!!!!!!!!!

I did push my luck and try and get her back off to sleep at 6.30 seeing as she had only had about 9 1/2 hours, but then again there was a good solid block of sleep in that time, so she wasn't having any of it so we got up.

I can't tell you how happy I am

If I could always get a good block between 12 and 6.30 I would be happy, I would settle for that! I mean obviously it would be great if she slept longer before that, but still it was only one NW in 9 1/2 hours which took me a matter of seconds to resolve

Anyhoo sorry for rambling on, feel on a bit of a high!! (Although the m/s was full on this morning, felt like I could cope with it better!!)

Have lovely weekends ladies and kiddies xxx

MummyToBen · « **Reply #34 on:** November 08, 2009, 19:30:14 pm »

wooohooo!!! That is so amazing - well done!!

louis-mummy · « **Reply #35 on:** November 08, 2009, 20:58:20 pm »

Amazing

Roseii · « **Reply #36 on:** November 08, 2009, 22:11:22 pm »

Thanks guys

Unfortunately last night was awful

DH settled her really quickly by 8.15pm and she slept til 11.15pm without a peep. But from then til about half 1 she kept coughing and waking herself up

I felt really sorry for her, she kept drifting off to sleep then would cough and start crying. DH was in with her til about 1, then I went in and gave her some cough med and she was still drifting in and out, coughing and crying, I ended up spending all night on her floor. Although it's no improvement, I don't feel like it's a regression as such because she wasn't monkeying around or refusing to go to sleep, she simply couldn't because of this blessed cough, poor bub.

Anyway her nap was all disrupted today for the same reason, she only slept about 50 mins, then a half hour catnap at about 6.45pm, consequently she only went to bed at 9.15, already woken once...So I don't really have any idea what to expect from tonight!!

Hope everyone had lovely weekends.

jordiwes · « **Reply #37 on:** November 09, 2009, 16:43:24 pm »

Of course! As soon as you're almost sorted, the cough starts!
That's always how it is for me.
((hugs)) You guys are doing great.
We are a big fan of cough medicine before bed.

franchick · « **Reply #38 on:** November 09, 2009, 16:46:51 pm »

You are doing great - she is really getting the hang of it and it's just a shame that she has a cough and it is interrupting her just now - well done!!!! xxx

Roseii · « **Reply #39 on:** November 11, 2009, 21:52:54 pm »

Hi ladies

GW is going really well, we hardly have any crying and dad is able to settle and put her to bed which is brill.

I don't know if I am expecting too much too soon but we seem to be a bit *stuck* now...

Tonight was night 12, fpr the past 2 nights I have withdrawn any physical contact when putting her to bed and she hasn't really objected. But I have still given her contact with the NWs...

Tonight I tried sitting on the mattress next to her cot rather than lying down and she just thought it was a great joke! She kept laughing, poking her cheeky face through the bars, throwing her dummy on the floor and proclaiming "ohhhh noooo" very dramatically (it was quite hilarious I must admit) So anyway I ended up caving and lying down next to her. She kept messing around, then after 40 mins she lay down, turned her back on me and I just sneaked out the room! That was 40 mins ago now and I haven't heard a peep...I don't think she was UT, she kept rubbing her eyes and yawning and had had 5 hours A time before bed...

Any ideas on how to move on from lying by the mattress? Might I be best to start trying WI/WO?? If so, hwo does that work?

Thanks so much in advance, any advice greatly appreciated. xxx

jordiwes · « **Reply #40 on:** November 11, 2009, 23:28:14 pm »

Hi Charli,
You could try WIWO, or moving closer and closer to the door. Obviously WIWO would work faster but the gradual moving would be gentler.
With WIWO, it's lying your babe down, saying a phrase like "night night" and walking out of the room. If babe starts crying count to 10 and walk back in, say your phrase and walk right back out. I personally lay my girl back down, but some LOs find that too stimulating.
Also, re-start your counting if there is a break in crying or if your LO seems to be calming down.
That's so great dad is able to put her to bed. We're not there yet!
Congrats on doing so well!

Roseii · « **Reply #41 on:** November 12, 2009, 08:14:20 am »

Thanks Jordiwes

Admittedly it is still harder when dad puts her to bed or settles her, she really screams, therefore I would always rush in and take over, but when I waited a bit it turned out she only made a fuss for a couple of mins then would settle for him. This has only been since the last 2 weeks, he never put her to bed prior to that. And if I go to settle her in the night she doesn't cry, just lies down, but she really cries when dad goes in but again it is for no more than a minute. I so hope you get there soon so you can have a break!!
Thanks so much for the WI/WO advice...I am scared that if I start it I will break the trust that I have built up with her doing GW....so maybe I need to stick to that for a bit, and just try sitting again tonight and hope she doesn't think it's a big joke! Or maybe I could still lie down but further from her bed...I'll end up like some sort of snake sliding across her bedroom floor!!

franchick · « **Reply #42 on:** November 12, 2009, 09:53:09 am »

What about doing what you did the other night and lying down a little bit closer and closer to the door each night, but with your back turned to her so she doesn't get any eye contact and knows that she is expected to go back to sleep, even if she messes around for ages this should eventually sink in (albeit you might get OT for a while....). This kind of thing is never easy, for sure!

I know that when our DD was going through a phase of messing about (which drove me nuts!! lol), lying with my back to her did work really well, especially if I pretended I was asleep. What I had to do (to keep my sanity) was deliberately think of things other than her sleep (e.g. work, the house, holidays, anything!) and not worry about how long it was taking her to get to sleep.

Think back to 12 days or so ago and what a tremendous difference you have made already!

louis-mummy · « **Reply #43 on:** November 13, 2009, 15:02:00 pm »

Hi Charli

How was last night?

Roseii · « **Reply #44 on:** November 13, 2009, 21:11:53 pm »

Hey ladies

Thanks for that suggestion Franchick, I think still lying down but turning round is a really good idea. We kina regressed again a bit...eek. Only slightly, and overall the improvement is so great. Last night DH put her to bed cos I just felt so ill and shattered with m/s, so anyway she screamed, wouldn't drink much of her milk, took a while to settle but she did eventually at about 9.30pm...The she was awake at 11.15pm, 2am, 6am then we got up at 7.30am after I slept in her room from 6am...So it was quite a bad night, but still I managed to go back to my bed til 6am which is good....And it's been nearly 2 weeks since she came anywhere near our bed, yay!!

Tonight I put her to bed, she didn't finish her milk which is unusual, but then she was straining to get into her bed! So I put her in, she found her dummy and she was asleep in minutes...So fingers crossed tonight might be better.

We still haven't had more than 6 hours in a block...I mean 6 hours is a lot better than it was, bt do you think she will ever STTN?? Do some babies just not possess the ability?! If I wasn't having another one I don't think I would mind so much, it's tiring but not stressful getting up to her in the night, not like it used to be...

Hmmm. Anyhoo have lovely weekends everyone thanks for listening to me ramble on

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