My 5 month old wakes every hour and wont nap through the day - I am so confused

[Samsmum14]

ps can you tell me which book I should read. I have the pink one with a baby on the front is that it or do I need to get a specific sleep one ? xx

[anna*]

Can you write out what an 'average' day - or even just today - looks like ie

awake: what time, how long
sleep: what time how long
etc for the whole day?

[Samsmum14]

Hi Anna

Today was a total mess up and it was our fault - he was soooooo OT

My oh is supposed to feed my lo at 7am when I am in bed until he goes to work, then I get up.

He popped his head in at 8.30am to say good bye and he hadnt got my ds up as he usually wakes up but he had a broken nights sleep so he was left in bed

Today It looked like


E 8.30 8oz
A 8.45 - 11.15 ( too long me thinks but we were at his playgroup )
S Fell asleep in his carseat in a snowsuit 11.15 so I had to get him out of it as he would have burned up . Ended up having a meltdown and tried to put him down twice - he had broken sleep of about 50 mins.

E 13.15 8oz
A 13.30 - 14.30
S 14.30 - 15.10 had to abandon as he woke and he went past 15 pu/pd

E 15.15 8oz
A 15.30 - 17.15
S 17 .25 -18.00

A 18.00 - soft play, bath , story , bottle
S - asleep 19.30 after 10m mins shhh/pat pu/pd ( dont think he will stay down tonight )


For the last few days his naps have been broken and I am doing pu/pd half way through and sometimes having to stop it altogether. Think I need to try get the wake to sleep correct. I have got a little note book to try write everything down so I can look back.

Another thing thats confusing me is - if my ds is due a sleep/feed when his group is on what do I do - he has swimming at 1 pm on tuesdat which will coincide with a feed and then baby massage on wednesday which will coincide with a sleep - ohhhh the mind boggles .

ps Do I have the correct book - i have just been using that as reference but guess I need to read it all x

[anna*]

Well I think you hit the nail on the head saying he's overtired. Basically, at 5 months old he's not going to manage more than two hours MAXIMUM awake without getting overtired. Also, it's very common for the first A time to need to be the shortest of the day. While he is struggling with naps and getting OT, I would start putting him down for his first nap after he has been awake 1.5hrs.

Do remember that after a short nap, he will manage even less awake time. So after his 11am nap (waking at 12.05ish) he had 2.5hrs awake, which is too long even after a good nap. In that scenario, I'd recommend putting him down for his next nap after 1.5hrs or even less if he is showing tired signs.

Looking at your routine as a whole, I really think the key is going to be cut those awake times WAY back.

S 14.30 - 15.10 had to abandon as he woke and he went past 15 pu/pd

can you tell me what you mean by this?

Another thing thats confusing me is - if my ds is due a sleep/feed when his group is on what do I do - he has swimming at 1 pm on tuesdat which will coincide with a feed and then baby massage on wednesday which will coincide with a sleep - ohhhh the mind boggles .

I know this sounds really killjoy, but while you're struggling with huge overtiredness it really is advisable to spend 2-3 days at home catching up on sleep and getting into a better routine. When he is well rested, he will be better able to be a bit flexible without it causing overtiredness. When he's not OT, you'll be able to look at a day's routine and say OK on tuesdays I can wake him up half an hour earlier so that everything fits, or I can wake him a little early from this nap and then do his next nap a bit earlier etc. Also when he's not overtired he may find it easier to sleep in his pram if necessary when you are on the go.

ps Do I have the correct book - i have just been using that as reference but guess I need to read it all x

All of the books are great, there's none which is specifically about sleep - because E impacts on A and S, and S impacts on E and A - etc

[Samsmum14]

hi Anna

can you tell me what you mean by this?

When he woke from is nap early I did the pu/pd but he still wasnt settled by 15 mins so I stopped.

You are right about his groups - I just feel bad keeping him in the house but until I know what I am doing then I should stay home and let him catch up. Bad mummy 

Thank you I will give it a really good go tomorrow xx

[anna*]

Oh OK I see. In my experience it's really, really hard to extend overtired naps - the key is to getting the A time right. ((((hugs)))) don't feel bad about keeping him in the house. A few songs with you, a little time under his baby gym, that is plenty of stimulation and in fact while he is so OT it is probably a good idea to keep the stimulation really low anyway.

Keep posting for support, and have a read of your BW book if you can, there's loads of good stuff in there.

[Samsmum14]

Thanks for my hugs and support

I have been taking him out lots because a hv told me that he seemed to need lots of simulation and I needed to wear him out. I was upset when she said that to me as even if we are in I play with him , sing , read most of our day and I felt like she was accussing me of just not bothering. It wont be too much of hassle not going - I have been the only person in the groups anyway - just good to get out and let him play with different toys .. 

better go catch up on some sleep now xx

[Katet]

You are right about his groups - I just feel bad keeping him in the house but until I know what I am doing then I should stay home and let him catch up.

Honestly at 5mo he will probably get as much out of looking out the window at trees blowing in the wind as he will from a group, getting out of the house is good (mostly for Mum when they are young) but not when you spend the whole rest of the day with a tired grumpy child.

also from my experience information from HV/child nurses can often be take with a grain of salt... some of them are fantastic, others are completely annoying & information is decades out of date... the most knowledgable person on your child is YOU & you sound like someone who has great instincts, so trust your self first & it is ok to question what an HV says & if it feels wrong to you/ your child, then it probably is KWIM.

[anna*]

Honestly, for a HV to say a 5 months old needs to be 'worn out' is just ridiculous. A busy toddler, yes, maybe.

[Samsmum14]

Thanks guys

Well I put him down a 1.25 after getting up atticipating it would take him 15mins to settle and his first nap has got to 1 hour and 40 mins so far - I am sat on the egde of my seat waiting for the cries  cant beleive it . I am going to concetrate on his naps this week and like you mentioned - i can tweak it when its established x

[anna*]

That is excellent. So good! What a little star you have there, 1hr 40 mins is an excellent nap!

[Samsmum14]

He did 2 hours !!! oh my goodness  I am so proud - its milk time and baby rice - I will keep you updated .

PS he has NEVER slept like that in the day in his cot x