Please help me with my 11 week old son!!

[charlie_0]

Hi,

New to the forum, and getting desperate!!!!!

My son is 11 weeks old, will be 12 weeks old on Friday, and will not sleep past 3-3:30am.

Our routine is that he has a 2 hour nap around lunchtime, and all other naps no longer than 15 mins. He has 7oz formula every 3-4 hours through the day.
We try to base our day on a 7-7, Up at 7, bathed and and fed and in his cot for 7pm, he will usually then go to sleep in around 10 mins, we wake him at 10:30pm for a feed, then he sleeps till 2-2:30, we feed, and he will go back to sleep for a maximum of one hour, and that is it. We keep the night time feeds calm and do not put bright lights on etc.

Last night, he woke at 3:15, and cried and cried, I got up and patted him shh shh etc etc, winded him etc, and he cried until 6am this morning, when I gave in and put him in his bouncer. He will not sleep past this time, please can anyone help?

Thanks in advance
Charlie

[deb]

I would NOT wake him for his feeds. Interrupted sleep can mess with their sleep cycles and then they wake when they'd otherwise be sleeping and end up OT and cranky, which is likely leading to those 15-minute non-naps during the day and then to an unsettled night. Think when you're wakened in the night for no reason you can think of and can't get back to sleep - sme kind of thing, only on baby terms. I'd either do a Dream Feed without waking him (if he DOES wake, then he does, but you're not doing the waking), or I'd wait for him to waken and feed him then IF he needs it.

Right about now he'll be going thru a growth spurt which will completely mess with the Sleep and Eat routines for a few days, so probably best to follow cues as best you can and then try afterward to settle on the schedule.

[anielasmommy]

you mentioned one two hour nap are you even having him on easy?

[anna*]

If he's only having 1 x long nap and all the others are 15 mins, I'd say he's massively overtired and that won't be helping with his early waking. Can you post his routine in EASY format?

[charlie_0]

Deb - We started off not waking him for a feed, he would sleep from 7 till 1ish, we then left him, but he was hungry, fed him, then again he would only sleep until 3 and no more after that. We only started waking him at 10:30 2 nights ago thinking it was the hunger that was keeping him awake.

Anna - Sorry think I put that wrong, he has an early morning nap around 9 ish of an hour, and then 2 hour sleep at lunchtime then maybe half an hour at 4, i meant other naps are kept to a minimum of 15 mins when he is sleepy.

Dont know what EASY is, but I will try and do his routine.

7am Awake and feed
9am sleep for an hour
11am Feed
12pm Sleep for 2 hours
2:30pm Feed
4pm Nap for 30 mins
6pm Bath
6:30pm Feed
7pm Bed in his cot
10:30pm Feed (we only started waking him 2 nights ago, before he used to sleep 7pm till 1am then feed, awake at 3, will not go back to sleep)
Next feed is when he wakes usually 2am
Then he is awake from 3-3:30am and will not go back to sleep

Hope that explains it, thanks
Charlie

[anna*]

Charlie, you mind if I recommend you get hold of one of the Babywhisperer books? Everything on these forums is set up to support those methods, so you'll really get the most out of being here if you know a bit of the background. They're really great methods for teaching independent sleep.

OK so at 11 weeks, 2 hours awake time is way too much. And before bed he is awake 2.5hrs which is definitely leaving him overtired at bedtime. I would try to make sure he is never awake more than 1hr20-30 mins max. That's total awake time, everything from eyes open to eyes shut. I'd also feed every 3 hours, to make sure he's getting as much as possible during the day. So your routine might go like:

7am awake and feed
8.30am nap
10am awake and feed
11.30am nap
1pm awake and feed
2.30pm nap
4pm awake and feed
5.30pm catnap 30 mins
6pm awake, start bath/bed routine
6.45pm last feed
7pm asleep for the night
10.30pm dreamfeed (try not to wake him, you want to really feed him in his sleep).

When he's getting a bit more daytime sleep you might find he's sleeping better in the early hours.

[deb]

One more question: breastfed, bottle (milk or formula - there's a difference! , or some of each?

[charlie_0]

Sorry, bottle forumla fed, SMA

Last night same, routine from 7 perfect, slept till I gave him a feed at 10:30 he was still very sleepy, woke at 2:10am, had a full feed, and went back to sleep for 20 minutes, and that was it. He will not go back to sleep in his cot after this bottle, if i put him in his bouncer or on me, he sleeps fine, but will not sleep in his cot at this time. Another night of crying from 2:30 till 5:30, when I eventually got him to sleep on my chest.

He sleeps in his cot like an angel from 7-2 with a feed inbetween, he knows he is going in cot as he is always slighlty awake, and after 5-10 mins is asleep.

It's as if at 3am he is saying right thats it mummy, time to get up, no more cot, i want to get up...

He has had problems with wind, maybe a bit colicky, but I don't understand how he sleeps so well in his cot from 7-2, but then refuses to sleep or even be in his cot after that feed.

Charlie

[deb]

Hmmmmm.... How about Wake2Sleep? The idea is that you go in a while before the habitual wake-up time and GENTLY stir the baby, just enough to get him to stir slightly, maybe do a bigger breath and roll over. This can sometimes help them re-set the sleep cycles and sleep thru a habitual wake-up. I was always too darned tired to get it right (even if I set an alarm I wouldn't hear it and would sleep thru till baby woke me, needed an alarm that sounded like a fussy baby LOL) , but many other moms here have had success with this. So you aren't FULLY waking the baby, just sort of stroking his hair perhaps, or one stroke on his arm.

If nothing else has worked, this can't hurt to try.

One other thought: my second DD still likes to snuggle with us at 4-1/2; it's only recently she stopped climbing into bed with DH and me during the night, and still will come to snuggle if she has a bad dream. She's very cuddly and kitten-like so we actually don't mind, kinda like it, but as a baby when she DID wake, she very much NEEDED to have human contact to get back to sleep. Stuffed animal just didn't cut it till she was about a year old, and even then not so much. I know, it's very AP and not so BW, but at the same time we had to do what worked for THAT baby.

[anna*]

How was his daytime sleep yesterday? Good days definitely beget good nights...