3 month old - should I feed on schedule or on waking?

[AndyMummy]

Hi there,

My DD is 3 months old this coming Tuesday.  She is a 45 min catnapper, which I plan to fix in the future when I can do PUPD.  I also have a 19 m DS, which makes extended shh-pat sessions impossible.  She goes down every 1.5 hrs for 45 mins.

I would like to extend her feeding "schedule" to 3 or 4 hours, and am not sure if I should stick to certain times of the day, and ignore her nap routine (for the most part, but maybe give her a bit of a feed if her nap would overlap with a feed time).

I read in the "how to deal with 2 under 2" that sometimes a 45 min nap will just have to be enough.  And for now, I was so thankful to read that.  I was beating myself up for not helping DD nap longer.  (She is swaddled, has white noise, room is dim but not dark which could be a problem).

Anyway, this is similar to Lauraelizabeth's question in another topic, except I'm pretty sure I can't fix naps until PUPD becomes an option.  PUPD worked a dream with my son when he was 5.5 months and a catnapper.

[anielasmommy]

shes too young for 4hr schedule at this point but you can defiantely do a 3 hr. if shes still sleeping i would just wait till she wakes when the 3 hr mark comes along. just go by the clock otherwise you will have a wicked snacker on your hands lol

[WhisperingHush]

Hi.  I know what you mean.  I abandoned shh-pat or anything similar when I had my second.  Still, I think it is important to keep to Tracy's order of things (EASY) and stick with a 3 hour schedule/routine at this point or else you risk not just getting a snacker, but also letting this one think she runs the show (bad for you and DS).  My second DD definitely had more issues than my first due to her personality and also my inability to try a lot of things with her due to having a 2 year old in the house, but she straightened up just fine with pu/pd as you said.  Do you think you cannot do pu/pd at 3 months?  I think I did it at 3 months with her, but no sooner (I think that is what Tracy says in BW Solves Your Problems??).  Also, are you anti-thumb sucking?  I have found that thumb sucking is a really great thing to help them learn to soothe themselves through the 45 minute mark when that is a problem.  If you are okay with that, help her to find her thumb by spending some time with her putting her thumb in her mouth for her.  She will love it.  Anyway, I know things are rough now, but I do think you can pull this one through as you did your first.  I'm on number three now and telling myself the same thing!  Good luck to you.

[AndyMummy]

Thanks to both of you.  I will start sticking to a feeding routine.

Isn't it between 3 and 4 months that they move to a 4 hour routine?

As far as PU/PD at this age, that's possible, I my instinct says she's quite ready for that.  She was a colicky baby until about 8 weeks, so we've only had 4 weeks without screaming and relatively easy put downs with shh-pat (while I'm standing) to sleep.  I've only just stopped lunging with her (trying to get rid of motion as a prop).  When all this settles in, I'll try PU/PD.  I may not be able to wait until Feb 1st!

Re: the thumb.  I'm not anti thumb, but that would mean I would swaddle her with one arm out, right?  She seems comforted by a good tight swaddle and then sucks her tougue (apparently I was a tongue sucker too).

[anielasmommy]

yeah 4 months goes to 4 hours. idk if you breastfed...my LO just turned 12 weeks and im doing a shh/pat pu/pd combo lol shes getting the hint that she needs to sleep when i put her down. shes a spirited angel baby and fortunately her angel kicks in with pu/pd b/c i only have to do it once literally and shes just like oh ok and nods off lol but shes a wicked problem napper too. im doing httj right now but its a pain in the u know what and its been three weeks and shes not getting through them on her own...

[~ Vik ~]

Just wanted to pop in with a little extra information for you You absolutely do want toget on a more structured feeding routine to ensure that she takes full feeds and avoids a snacking habit. However, it's very important to follow feeding cues, especially with breastfed babies.  During growth spurts you will likely need to feed more frequently to help your supply match her growing demand.  Check out http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=66001.0 for more info

Isn't it between 3 and 4 months that they move to a 4 hour routine?

Generally at 4mo a bunch of things happen that allow babies to move to a 4h routine: they can handle longer A times, their stomachs are bigger and they can take more per feed, leading them to last longer between feeds. However, many breastfed babies take longer to reach a 4h feeding routine due to the composition and digestibility of breastmilk. For example, my ds moved to a 3.5h feeding routine by around 4.5mo, and stayed there until we got to a 4h feeding routine at 5.5mo. And that's quite normal for ebf babies!

Hth

[AndyMummy]

DD is exclusively breastfed (EBF?).  I'll stick to a 3 hour feeding routine and just roll with her naps for now.  She just went through a bit of a growth spurt and was feeding more frequently, so I'm just trying to get her back on track.

I'm still a bit shell shocked from the colic, so I have a hard time believing she'll be able to self-soothe!  Her sleep was a LOT of work for the first 7 or 8 weeks.  I know she will one day.  In the next week or so I'll change to some more shh-pat in the crib (I do it all on my shoulder right now) and the modified Pu/Pd.

Thank you!