Hi there
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Just to offer my two cents' worth in addition to Wendy...if you could nap when he does and go to bed as soon as you can at night after both kids are down, I think that would help even just a *tiny* bit...to help you feel more refreshed.
Re: you wanting to try CIO...I understand that you feel like you're at your wit's end and that nothing is working, so why not just do it, right? Been there, too. It's rough, especially when LOs aren't sleeping at night. Can I suggest that you not go down that path? CIO doesn't teach him anything except that no one is coming when he cries. We're here to help you use techniques that will help him learn to sleep better. Plus, if it's discomfort from teething or him getting stuck at the bottom on his crib, he's crying because he needs some help/comfort. I know you probably don't really want to do CIO (or maybe, you really do), but I think we can figure this out--or at least help you cope with it all--in a much gentler way *hugs* I really do sympathize with how you're feeling, though; I really do.
So, I was wondering, hon, if you could post what his entire day looked like. A full EASY (24h time frame), in the EAS format. I'm thinking he might need a bit of tweaking overall.
Also, at night...you said that he can replug his own pacifier, yet you and DH often go back in and replug it for him? Do you think it might help to view these NWs in terms of a prop issue?
Related to that, his formula intake during the whole day/night. Could you put that in the EAS routine? I'm wondering if not only the feeding at night is a prop issue, but might also need to be shifted so that he's consuming more during the day.
I often feel like the A time after DS's second nap is a food fest. He gets a bottle (6-7 oz), then solids 30 minutes later, and then he gets a bedtime bottle (~6 oz). That's 12-13 oz plus solids in under 3h! I feel just like you...must be a TON of food; but if you treat the first bottle as the meal and the bedtime bottle as the top-off, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Lastly, teething can wreak havoc with even the most textbook of routines. If you notice that pain meds/teething gel help him settle and sleep better, then it's probably a good idea to offer them as long as he needs them (and in a way that you feel comfortable doing). Before naps, give it 30 minutes prior; then 30 minutes before bed. Might need a top off at night.
HTH a bit.
P.S. Not all LOs are alike, but I thought you might want to see how our days look; if for nothing other than how we fit in the Es
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Awake 7
E: 7--bottle (usually 7-8 oz); solids at 8
A: 3h15
S: 10:15 (1.5h)
Awake 11:45
E: 12 (7 oz); solids at 1
A: 3h25
S: 3:10 (between 1h15-1h30)
Awake ~4:30
E: bottle (~6 oz); solids at 5ish
A:
E: bottle 30 minutes before bed (~6 oz)
S: asleep by 7:45