do you have structured activities all day?

[mmom]

I am feeling like a bad/lazy mom in general.  There are some days where my LO and I don't leave the house at all and I have to admit, that I don't do creative things on those days either.  I am lucky that my LO will play independently for ages, as long as he can check in with me from time to time.  I was just reading through the activities for toddlers sticky to get some ideas and I am wondering what other moms of 18 month olds do all day.  Are you spending a lot of time on the floor interacting? I am wondering if I am hindering development in any way by not providing more learning activities for my LO to do with me while he is home.  We go to toddler classes 2 days per week and a toddler group at least 1x per week.  But on the days were are home and stuck in the house, I am thinking I need to do more for him.  Yesterday I was wasn't feeling well and pretty much laid around while he entertained himself. 

[Sarah - Enfys' Mum]

I do very very little in the way of structured activities with Enfys, and never have.  I do work 4 long days a week and I have lots to catch up with when we are home.  Like you, I am lucky that she will play by herself for a long time.  She likes to help do stuff around the house, like cooking, and I like to think she is learning by living.

[deb]

If it worries you, maybe you could set up a time during the day where you and your LO do something together, whether it's a craft project or play-doh or reading together or dancing to music in the living room or whatever. I also find that just including my kids in whatever I'm doing helps us connect; Josie never did take to folding laundry, but she'll do it grudgingly if we're talking girl-talk or listening to fun music in the background while we fold. Natalie is a champion napkin-folder, tho, and will even *gasp* wash dishes now! Both girls can sweep crumbs with a brush into a dustpan, clean the bathroom (mostly - I still do some steps), and even help in the kitchen now after the time they've spent standing on stepstools when I say, "Hey, guys, check this out!"

But structured? Nope, not even at 4-1/2 and 8, except for the homeschooling we do with Josie, and even that is a pretty loose structure.

[~inbalance~]

Hi Kara, following along as I am pretty much the same here too.     T is SO good at entertaining himself, I think I've gotten rather lazy about finding new things for him to do.  Am interested in what others say as well.

[Mrs. A]

I'm going to jump in as well. I always feel like I *should* be doing something structured but it doesn't seem to happen very much if at all.  Now that DD2 has arrived we're not going to be structured for a LONG time! LOL.   I like what Sarah said about learning by living. It's a good way to think about it without bringing on the mommy guilt.

[Mashi]

Kara I have wondered this same thing many times!  I like that "learning by living" as well - a good way to think about it!

We do very little on Mondays and Tuesdays.  And Fridays.  And most afternoons.    But before the snow we really did have a much better "outings" schedule and I hope that we are able to get back into it in the spring, that the winter hasn't made me lazy.

The reality here is that in the mornings I sit on the floor and let DS dictate what we are playing.  Which is everything from Little People to play kitchen to colouring, to DVDs (which means getting all of the DVDs out, him choosing one, pushing the buttons on the DVD player and then changing his mind.  So we can play DVDs for an hour without actually watching any of them  ), to playdoh, and so on. When he does get into something I leave him but he lasts 5-10 minutes before dragging me back.   

In the afternoons we tidy up and do some house work and get dinner ready - he'll play in the kitchen sink full of water or stand at the counter and throw veggies or dump a bag of rice on the floor (ie/ help mommy) but that's really it - there isn't much time from the end of his nap at 230 until we eat dinner at 430 so it's pretty frazzled.

I make sure we go into town one morning a week, we go to the pet store, have a run around the mall, maybe sit in the bakery and have a snack, and chase the pigeons around the town square.  We used to do this like 3-4 days a week but with the weather, no.

We only have one playgroup during the week 

So at home, no....we are very unstructured and I don't plan much out. I would like to, I think I should, as we are both getting bored, but don't know where to start, kwim?

[mmom]

It actually makes me feel better to know that others aren't 'doing' things all day long.  I don't know why I feel as if I have to.  I just feel that if he was at a day care, he would be around other kids and learning more.  Plus, nowadays day cares are like mini schools with how structured they are. 

I do like the learning from living.  Although, my LO likes destroying more than helping...lol.  If a laundry basket is out, he takes all of the clothes out and throws them on the floor.  He also likes to throw papers everywhere, so if I am going through bills and stuff, forget it.  Mashi, like you, we used to get out every day when it was nice out.   Right now it is so cold and windy, that I have no interest in being outside at all.  I fee like once my LO can run around outside, it will be so much better.

I notice that play dough is suggested a lot.  Is that something a lot of you do with LO's this age?  I feel bad because I haven't even given my LO crayons to play with yet.

[~inbalance~]

I JUST gave DS some playdough today for the first time!  I've had some that was part of a birthday loot bag from last year, but haven't wanted to let him have it for awhile.  It does say 2+, but I thought I'd try it.  He was pretty good with it, kept him happy for awhile but really all he did was walk around squishing it in his hands.   

I think I have a fear of messy things, and so haven't busted out any type of artsy stuff yet, but am thinking I really should.  We haven't tried crayons yet either, but just the other day I thought I should get him some and some paper to colour on.  I'd love to get him an easel one day soon.

[mmom]

Martina, my SIL has this kid sized table and chairs and she puts a large sheet of white paper over the table.  My nephew LOVES drawing all over it.  He walks around the house all day with crayons in his hands.  I would have never have thought to give a toddler this age crayons had I not seen this.

[~inbalance~]

I do have a kid table that FIL made DS for Christmas which is supposed to be for art and craft stuff!!  I should pick some up.  A few weeks ago when we were at a playgroup DS spent half the time walking around with the cup of crayons.  Not colouring with them, he just liked holding them.  lol   

[deb]

Oooh, around this same age I remembered that one favorite Montessori activities is pouring water from one thing into another. They often start out messy, but usually will refine what they're doing and get surprisingly precise once they get into it.

We set up a small cabinet with a waterproof piece of plastic, a small dry cloth for wiping spills (sometimes several cloths ), a medium-sized cup of water, and a bunch of plastic cups you could see through (so yo could see how high the water was) and showed Nat a couple of things with pouring back and forth. This occupied her for a good half-hour or more while I cooked dinner, lasted a couple weeks till she was "finished" with that activity!

As far as Play-Doh and crayons, basically anything that they can make DO something, or anything they can get sensory input from, is GOOD. With Play-Doh they can feel it (and see it), with crayons they make a movement with it and the result is something they can see. Same principle behind noisemaking toys: they shake it or hit it or blow it and sound comes out! Oooh, a cookie sheet with shaving cream is primo fun! (This can be done at a sink or in a bathtub too.)And in the summer for two years running, Nat's favorite activity was pouring finger paint onto a big plastic mat we had on the patio and rolling naked in it.

Here's a picture of Natalie "tending bar" with her plastic cups:

[mmom]

Deb, that is so cute!!

Martina - That is what my LO does with crayons too!  But I bet if I exposed him to them more often, he might actually do something like color with them right?

[squeakersmum]

I'm rubbish at structured activities (although I definitely wouldn't label them as actually structured ATM) but do have bursts of inspiration every couple of weeks!!

We have, in the last week or so,
 - played with flour and water - sounds daft but it was GREAT fun!!  Started with just flour on his highchair tray and then once he (ok we) had played, drawn shapes, and smeared it over everything - I added water bit by bit so that it went from dry - to a dough like consistency and then a wet paste.  The great thing was that even though it was all over the kitchen floor - as soon as it was dry I just swept it up!

- made gingerbread - he did all the putting in the bowl and mixing up until the egg as I wouldn't want him to eat raw egg!  There was definitely more on the floor than in the bowl by the end but the end product that was left was pretty tasty.

- Used felt tips for the first time - I had an old exercise book and let him go wild.  TBH he spent a good 15 minutes looking at all the different colours of the pens and putting them in and taking them out of the box.

The week before...we did nothing...at all!!!

Other than that, he has a favourite nursery rhyme DVD that he watches pretty much every day, and like pps have said DS is fabulous at entertaining himself!!!!

[Mashi]

Re the crayons and playdoh...

I first gave DS a pen and coloured pencil to play with at about 14ish months...taped paper to his highchair try and showed him how to scribble, and then taped it to the fridge and he was SOOO proud of it!  I got my dad to send toddler (ie/ fat) Crayola crayons and a colouring book for Christmas, (I can only find pastels here really, crayons are for older kids not toddlers it seems?) and now we get them out every day. Basically we sit on the floor and he flips through his colouring book, scribbles for a second and turns the page. The crayons are all broken stumps now but once he got over it, he seems happier that there are 16 instead of just 8

For playdoh, we actually have modelling clay instead.  I picked it up one day on a whim, and now that he likes it I will get real plahydoh.  He just likes to push it and squeeze it, cut it with his plastic knife and make me make things for him.  We made homemade playdoh one day but he wanted nothing to do with it once it was done. No clue why!!

And funny about the table - we have just been browsing online picking one out!  We've talked of it for a while but have only managed to shuffle some space around for where we can put it.  Little wooden table and two chairs - I like it because he can colour, eat a snack, play with his toys etc.  But we also found a mini sofa and plush arm chair set, and he loves the one at the library so I want that, too!! 

We do a lot of water play in the kitchen sink....

But I would like to have my days more structured...more organised. More of an "its monday, we're going to play with playdoh and make rice shakers" and "tuesday, lets colour and play matching cards..." and that kind of thing.  But I sort of think that 18 months is a bit young for that, as he drops one thing and runs to something else as soon as it catches his eye. So it doesn't really matter what I plan...he dictates!

[nwmm]

When kids are old enough, consider playing with dry rice.  Mine do a lot of "pouring" with dry rice.  Give them any sort of container you can think of to play with - ice cream scooper, dry measurer, measuring spoons.