19 months...back again for advice!!!

[babyboy26]

Hello all!

My son will be 19 mos on the 25th.  I was having some nap and EW issues about 2 months ago, but a month ago stopped posting because I felt like obsessing over it was taking over my life!  Things settled down, and his current routine has been like this:

7:00 wake
12:15-2:15 nap (on average the nap is about 2 hrs, sometimes I only get 1.5, sometimes 2.5)
7:45 bed

It varies by 15m or so anywhere throughout the day depending on activities, wake up times, etc., but for the most part it has been pretty consistent.

Here is our current issue.  He has suddenly started screaming when I put him down for his nap.  Last Thursday, he went down as normal, but woke after 45m screaming.  I couldn't get him back to sleep, so he had an early bedtime.  On Friday, he fell asleep for 30m in the car on the way home, and I was able to transfer him to crib.  He whined for 5m or so (not real crying) but then went to sleep for an additional 45m.  Yesterday, (Saturday), he fell asleep for about 10m on the way home from an errand, but then screamed when I tried to put him in the crib.  I went in and APOP to sleep for 10m, tried to put him down, he screamed again.  I APOP again, and got another 25m out of him, but that's all.  Early bedtime last night, and slept 12hrs15m, which is rare for him these days. 

Today, he was fine during winddown, and fine when I put him in the crib, but as soon as I left the room, crying began.  Not as bad as it was yesterday, though. 

I should also mention that he is cutting canines.  2 have come through already this week, and the other 2 are right there.  I don't think the teeth are bothering him, though, as he seems fine during A time and I made sure to give meds 45m prior to nap time.  It seems he just wants me...could this be SA? 

One more thing...he is not doing this at bedtime, just for naps.

Any thoughts???

[LucySol]

i would try extending that A time a little before his nap.maybe he isnt quite ready to nap.Especially as he is only doing it for naps.
we do 5.5/6 before a nap and my dd is just 19 months too x

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Spencer is 19 months too, and we do 5.5/6 A before the am nap most days and get about a 2h+ nap out of her. On days where we have something exciting going on (even just a quick visit from Grandma is OS to Spencer!) I do the nap 1/2 h earlier.

[babyboy26]

Ok...may try that today.  I was wondering if I should cut back the A since he is teething.  I am def. thinking it is SA, since he has been very clingy and wanting to be held a lot.  Strange that he isn't doing it at night, though.  

I am having such a hard time with this, as I cannot stand to listen to him cry like that.  It is clear that he wants me, as he stops immediately when I pick him up.  Is APOP the wrong thing to do here?  I don't want him to get used to me rocking/holding him while he sleeps, but that is better than no nap at all, right?  

I am really dreading nap time today.  Yesterday I ended up doing APOP and he slept on me for 1 hr.  Went to bed at 7 and slept until 7 this am.  No crying at bedtime, no NWs.

Should I be doing WI/WO?

[babyboy26]

So I tried WI/WO, but didn't work.  I cannot comfort him in the crib.  He will not calm down and stop crying unless I hold him.  As soon as I put him down, he starts crying again.  At one point, it seemed to be a quiet cry where he would settle himself, on and off for about 20m, but then the screaming began again. 

Please help!  What do I do??  I don't understand why this is happening.  Although his naps have not always been the longest or consistent, he has been an independent sleeper since 5 months.  I have no idea where this is coming from or how to fix it.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Did you try a longer A time? Even when she is teething Spencer sticks to the same routine, though I know some kids need more sleep then. What about meds for the pain?

WI/WO was never something I tried with Spencer, always did GW when she needed extra help sleeping, before her crib was a toddler bed I would reach my arm between the bars and pat her bum as I sat beside her. Now that I can get in bed with her I will snuggle her until she settles down, which so far has worked.

[babyboy26]

No, I didn't actually try a longer A, as I was pretty sure he was tired.  In fact, he started to fall asleep in the car around 10:45 when we were on our way home from an errand.  So, I tried for his normal A. 

I don't even think I could sit on the floor and pat him through the crib, as he is standing up and crying.  I try to lay him down and pat him, but he is wiggling all around and putting his arms out for me.  I know he is tired, as he is falling asleep when I pick him up and rock him.  As soon as I get up out of the chair, though, the crying begins.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Spencer used to stand up too, to see if I would pick her up, but once she realized I wasn't budging she would lay down and fuss while I patted her. If he knows you will pick him up, he probably wouldn't give up so easy. Is he still going down at bedtime okay? Could you keep his A time very low key and try to extend it to see if it helps? That way at least you would know if that was the issue. Which teeth is he getting? We are on canines right now and they are the worst!

[babyboy26]

You are probably right about the picking up thing, but it is soooo hard not to pick him up when he is so desparately wanting me to. 

Yes, bedtime has had no issues...no crying, no NWs, no EWs.  In fact, he's sleeping 12+ hrs due to shorter naps.

Yes, I can try and extend his A and see if that helps...I just don't want to push too much too fast, you know?

We are also on canines.  Has gotten 2 already, 2 more on the way...they are right there.  And yes, I have been giving pain meds before sleep.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

ugh canines are the worst, we have one down and three to go! Maybe push his A time in small increments and see how that goes.