Don't worry, I am still in the same boat as you! My DS still has really good days, but MANY more low intake of solids days. The finger feeding/sucking works occasionally, and he will take the odd bite from the spoon. The other day he was playing with the bowl of cereal, so I put it up to his mouth and he "drank" some of the cereal! After about 4-5 times of that he finished the bowl! Sometimes he is not interested in the food when we first start out the meal, but when I am finished my breakfast he will decide that he will let a few bites in. He still likes to take control of the feedings, so if I make the rice cereal a little stickier with pears he can get some of the food into his mouth with "his" spoon. Every day is certainly an adventure. I think tomorrow I might try a bigger spoon and see if that makes any difference. He is really good at swallowing the solids (has not gagged once, even with drinking from the bowl), but it is certainly a challenge just getting that food in there!
Also, he does not eat very much on a good day. The most he has eaten is 5mL of the dry rice cereal mixed with 20-25mL of formula.
FTM - maybe try adding some fruit to the cereal?? I know that the first time I did that even though the pears were just on his lips he noticed a difference in the taste and gave me a reaction. Maybe your DD needs a little "jolt" like that to notice that there is something different going on? Or as some of the other mom's suggested to dip a toy/finger food in the cereal and let her suck it off?