Sleep help, night wakings and naps, help please!!

[PYPF]

Hey everyone, I'm quite new to this but in my desperation I thought I would aks other Mums for their help and having watched every episode of the Baby Whisperer on Discovery I figure this is the best place for me! My DD is 15mths old and never been a great sleeper, but after so long we're really exhausted by her wakings. She goes down at 7am with a bottle and no fuss, she's awake when I put her down, she rolls over with her bunny and she's asleep. Then at some point in the night she wakes and screams and screams and screams, often she's thrown her bunny out of the cot which makes things worse, often we'll leave her but she screams so hard she either poos or is sick so we have to go in and then there's no getting her back off, the cycle just begins again. If we go in at the beginning she goes mental when we leave her.
She's at nursery 4 days a week and seems to be in a good routine there, sleeps for about 2hrs in one nap, but the 3 days with me she won't nap longer than 30mins. Heeelp!!

[babybarr]

Can you write down her routine at nursery and at home and we can see if there are any obvious things a miss.

often we'll leave her but she screams so hard she either poos or is sick

The babywhisperer doesn't condone leaving a child to cry, there are 2 different methods you can use if they won't settle quickly on their own.  They are Walk in walk out or gradual withdrawal.  Have you got any of the BW books they are a good place to start.  The baby whisperer solves all your problems in particular.

Here is a link about the 2 methods I mentioned above
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=80750.0
Have a read and see what you think.
Hope that helps

Laura

[PYPF]

Thank for replying Laura, I feel like I'm at my wits end! I have got the original BW book and the solves all your problems but I couldn't find much on night waking other than keeping a good bedtime routine and putting her down awake etc which we already do. I think we've got so exasperated we leave her to cry which I know we shouldn't, if we go in and pat her she calms down, even drifts off but as soon as the hand is taken away and we edge to the door she shoots up, and if we dare to leave the room she goes loopy 
Her nursery routine is as follows:
8-8.30 arrive & breakfast
11.30 lunch
12-2 nap (she naps for anything from 1 to 2 hrs, usually around 1.5 apparently.)
3 tea
5.30 home
6 dinner
6.30 bath
7 bottle & bed

When she's with me she needs a nap by 9amish, lunch is at midday and then at some point in the afternoon she needs to nap again but really fights this one and it's rarely for anythng more than 30mins if that, and then I find her grumpy til bedtime. She's always been a very light sleeper, and she's quite spririted. It's been like this since birth to be honest. Any advice or help I would so appreciate, thanks so much.

[babybarr]

Ok a couple of thoughts. Firstly I would stick to the same routine at home as she has at nursery, it's obviously working for her there and then hopefully you'll stop getting the nap refusal,  I would try not to let her fall asleep before 11.30am and then hopefully she'll nap well.

I would also bring bedtime forward, to be asleep for 6.30pm and just see if any if that helps.  I would stick to this for a good few days.  What time is she waking in the morning?

During the night I would do the same for each NW, you need to decide what works for you.  We do WI PUPD WO which is a little tiring with a nearly 2 year old but he'll settle with one of these so it's worth it.  He doesn't settle if I'm in the room and he doesn't settle if I don't do the PUPD.

[PYPF]

Thanks Laura I will give it a go next Friday when she's off nursery next, today we managed two naps, neither for longer than 30mins and both began with screaming and I eventually patted her to sleep and crept out :-( when you to the PUPD how many times do you do this? Every time he cries? And do you PU, reassure and PD or wait for them to calm down before PD? Usually she's screaming before I lay her back down again, so then how long do I wait to pick her up again?!

[babybarr]

What time did you try for the nap today?

I only need to do the routine once with him to settle him now, but I have been using the same thing since he was little and he'll go quiet straight away when I put him down. 

I think you need to do as you have been - sitting with her until she is calm and asleep.  I wonder if she's getting herself worked up because she's had the negative experience of being left and then being sick.  I think she probably needs the reassurance.  Have a read of the link I posted above.

I do really think the timing of the naps is key.  Do early bedtime only if she naps badly otherwise the 7pm bedtime should be fine on nursery days when she naps 2hrs.

[PYPF]

She napped at 9.30am and 12.30, maybe she wasn't as tired as I thought?! Both she screamed so I pated her asleep and neither were longer than 30mins - for the lunchtime nap she defintiely needed longer as she was shattered all afternoon but I couldn't get her down again. I'll have a read now, thank you everso much for your support and advice.

[babybarr]

When at home I definitely wouldn't do nap before 11.30 and if at nursery 12 works then do that.  She probably looks tired but isn't tired enough, we get that a lot here too.  Sometimes you just have to push through instead of following her cues all the time.  Hope that makes sense.