1 nap still not working

[babybarr]

Bless him - he looks like he is having so much fun.

It looks like 12.5 (max 13) hrs is what he needs now.  Maybe you'll only be able to push that nap with a 12hr night??

I think - if you can - then do the daycare thing.  I wish I could send DS to daycare and not work to be able to clean our house too, boy does it get to me. I don't feel I should be doing it when DS is around as I feel guilty but equally it's a mess!!

[*Jo*]

oh its so depressing looking at all the sample routines for the 13+months, they all do 2 hour naps and have 12 hour nights waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh, its so not fair!

when we were out in the car today he yawned twice at 4 hours 15mins A time but i thought it was just cos we were in the car and its so relaxing and thats why he yawned, what do you think? ugh, never mind me, im just grasping at straws again! at least we know he doesnt need more A time after todays little fiasco why do have to have this all figured out? why does it bother me so much>?

[babybarr]

oh its so depressing looking at all the sample routines for the 13+months, they all do 2 hour naps and have 12 hour nights waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh, its so not fair!

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh from me too!!!  I know DS is older but I feel depressed hearning about toddlers who do 11.5hr nights and 1.5hr naps...sigh...

I don't know why we need to figure it out, I guess because we want our child to sleep to be rested and develop well.  Do you think Caleb would manage on a morning nap and a longer A till bed? How has he typically been - more of a morning or afternoon boy?  I know DS always won't settle to bed without a certain amount of time and would never do a long morning and a 4hr A till bed - not that anything works with my boy! - but just wondered naturally which category Caleb fell into? if that actually makes any sense to you!!

[*Jo*]

Yes that makes sense, he used to have the first A time being critical and exact but then after his nap he could do up to 7 hours before bedtime and that worked well, however once we went to NZ it all went crazy and I haven't found an A time that works for him yet, so when I say I'm looking for an A time I only need it for the morning one because after his nap (as long as it's a decent one) hecan pretty much handle anything. So my original concerns in all these posts were about having only a 1.5 hour nap, however since the NZ trip we just haven't been able to get back on track and it's been three weeks since we went away. It was only a two hour time difference so I can't figure out why it's affected him this way if it is indeed the real issue here. He was fine in NZ and napped fantastically with a 5 hour 20min A time doing up to 1 hour 50min naps some days but from the day we arrived home it's been all over the place

[babybarr]

napped fantastically with a 5 hour 20min A time

Then go back to this maybe??  So even if you get an EW do nap after this time and then whatever bt you think...

[*Jo*]

Ive already tried that, he cried the house down and refused to go to sleep, but im gonna give it another try... right about now i will dance naked in the front yard if it means he will go back to great sleeping lol

[babybarr]

right about now i will dance naked in the front yard if it means he will go back to great sleeping lol

Bet your neighbours would like that!!  I expect that'd at least make Caleb chuckle too failing all else!!

I reckon stick with it for a few days - if you can bear it and see what happens?

[*Jo*]

hahaha, yes Caleb would crack up laughing seeing that, he thinks his mum is a funny dancer hehehe

Ok, so i will try that once again and see what happens, im hoping you will be rid of my moaning soon enough! lol

[babybarr]

im hoping you will be rid of my moaning soon enough!

It's a nice change from my moaning!!

[Tweakster]

He was fine in NZ and napped fantastically with a 5 hour 20min A time doing up to 1 hour 50min naps some days but from the day we arrived home it's been all over the place

This is my plug for the whole stimulation factor.  I've seen some of the vids, highly stimulating and peer stimulation for Caleb.  It may have actually helped him sleep better.

At this point, I would aim for 1 nap and at a set time and see if you can even him out a bit.  Choose your last known decent A time, and like Laura said before, accept the nap, whatever nap he gives and just keep offering it at the same time.  Then as you said, slowly push bedtime back so that you can get to a decent wake time.  Then you may have to wake him 30 mins earlier than he would normally wake and you may get that longer nap back.  I think he's definitely telling you something with his attempt at self-regulating and the amount of sleep he is actually pulling in a 24 hr period.

Great sandbox!

[katie80]

Completely agree with Wendy.

I know you don't think much of set nap times for Caleb, so if you don't want to go there, that's ok.  But you've tried so many different A times and are getting so frustrated.  It's not worth it, in my book.  I think if he's not teething or ill, set that nap time and maybe bedtime too and see how he regulates.  At 17.5 mo, this is what I did with my LO, and it was pretty easy to see what times were going to work best for her after a couple weeks.  I think this is the only way you'll get to push bedtime back eventually.

[alohahellokitty]

If you have them opportunity to send your lo to daycare a couple days a week or mornings he might love it! When I had lo#2 I sent our (then 18 months) lo#1 to nursery 2 days a week. she LOVED it and begs every day to go. She also sleeps better on those days. (naps there and nights at home with no nw's or ew's) It used to make me SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO mad to no end when they would tell me she had a 2hr nap at nursery. B/c I could NOT get her to sleep past 50 min. I asked them how they did it and even came in and looked at where they nap and they told me how they put them all down exc... Anyway, after many frustrating days of not getting much nap out of her here (and tears during nap time... by me LOL) I just figured out she needs that social interaction and has lots of energy she needs to burn off. And I guess they do it. She also sleeps great after church (playing with the kids in nursery).

Every LO has a different personality. And if you have the ability to you might just give it a go to see how he does. My lo cried the first couple times but then loved it. It just took a week or two for her to adjust.

My second lo is very different and will not need daycare/nursery until quite older. He's much more laid back than #1.

[Tweakster]

If it helps Finn was a nightmare for naps on the weekend, didn't want to, even though he was ill, DH even had to drive him around.  Today back at daycare, he napped without issue for 2 hrs.  I don't know how they do it, they must have magic napping fairy dust they sprinkle in the milk lol.

[*Jo*]

Ok had a 12 hour nght which brings wakeup to 7am (yay!!) I will do the last known best A time at 5 hours 20mins so the time will be 12.20 for a nap (strangely enough this is what time I've been putting him to bed for the past three days anyway) and I will make that my set time and I will try and stick with it. I know you ladies have encouraged me many many times to do set naps and it may seem as though I've been ignoring it but I haven't, I have tried them a couple of times and it has scared me to see some of the results, however I've never really been consistant long enough with them so yes I am going to try and do that now
I'm going to take Caleb to a tiny tots playgroup this morning to help stimulate him as well. I really do appreciate you all hanging in there with me for this.

[babybarr]

We know you haven't been ignoring us we also know that Caleb *appears* to do better with A times.  Glad you had another good night though - that is at least something to hold onto.  Hope you get a good nap today.

I don't know how they do it, they must have magic napping fairy dust they sprinkle in the milk lol.

I wonder if it's because ALL of the children are sleeping together - they all know they have to go to sleep, also probably cos there are no mummies around to "play" !!  It makes you wonder though how much crying went on at the beginning - do you think?